Scared for my heart I DONT WANT TO DIE

Posted , 4 users are following.

Hi everyone

I'm a 20 year old female who is a bit overweight and for the past month I have been dealing with panicy thoughts concerning my health. It started back when I had caffeine and my heart start clenching so I went to the ER that same night. Blood Tests, EKG, and X ray came out fine but for the past month the feeling of anxiety overwhelmed me. I also went to the ER in October for the same thing and everything came out fine too.

Fast forward to now and I have been getting really bad chest pains that shoot into my arms and I clench my jaw because of it and create jaw pain. Everyone around me including my PCP and mental health person at the office thinks it is panic disorder because I fear when the next chest pain will be. I am terrified that I am going to die because I also get muscle twitches and spasms on the left side of my chest as well. Last week my mental health specialist told me that if i feel like something is wrong with my heart is to check my pulse and that was a huge mistake because ever since. I have had such an obsession constantly checking it to make sure its below 100 bpm and I am absolutely terrified to do anything because I dont want my heart rate to go up. Sometimes I feel my heart pounding my chest whenever I do something like walk around or go upstairs and its horrifying. Its all I ever think about any more and everyone around me is getting tired of telling me that I'm fine. Sometimes I feel a drop or a rush in my chest that scares me as well.

One thing I should mention that scares me the most is going to sleep because when I wake up my bpm is high when I check my pulse and I wake up practically every hour shaking from it. I just want to know that I'm not alone and that this is truly anxiety/panic disorder like everyone has told me it is.

Also I am currently taking half a xanax when I feel like its an emergency and I usually take it during the evening. I was put on Zoloft for a 4 days but didnt like how dizzy it made me feel so I stopped taking it too.

I just want to be assured that I'm not gonna die. I have a cardiologist appointment on March 18th and its torture waiting for it because I just want that affirmation from a cardiologist that I'm okay but until then I'm scared that I'm gonna die and I really am tempted to have my mom take me to the ER again. I got an EKG yesterday and my BPM was 103 and it said that it was a normal EKG but sinus tarcarydia came up and that makes me more terrifed.

To those that read this far thank you so much. I would love to hear your thoughts and reassurances. This is such a new overwhelming feeling for me that causes me to break down nearly every hour of the day.

1 like, 2 replies

2 Replies

  • Posted

    Hi there, sorry to hear you are having a rough time. I have suffered with chest & arm pain for the past 20 odd years, im 35 now. I also get occasional dizzyness, nausea and all the other crap aniexty brings up. Despite numerous examinations by machines and doctors over the years nothing out of the ordinary has ever been found. I know from bitter experience that it is incredibly hard to tell yourself nothing is wrong when your body seems to be screaming out to the contrary. Have you tried breathing into a paper bag when these feelings come on, it does help? You may find going for walks and getting some fresh air helps with the sleeping. Try to go before dinner in the evening if you find that is the most difficult time of day for you. I also find things like crosswords or wordsearches are a good distraction for the mind when it starts to go into overdrive. I hope once the cardiologist has given you the all clear it will ease your worries somewhat and you can concertrate on coping with the mental aspects. Aniexty is a terrible thing and one of the worst parts is that its invisible, so no one knows when you are suffereing a lot of the time.

  • Posted

    hello. my name is Eugene, im 38. i was diagnosed with GAD a few years back but have been experiencing issues since 2015. i went to ER because i was sure i was dying. i went to cardiologist as well to get a second opinion, everything was normal. i read your post and have the exact same feelings. i currently feel like i will die in my sleep or i feel like I'm waiting to have a heart attack. i was feeling super good up until three weeks back. i was on keto diet and felt dizzy one day. and that triggered my anxiety. im fairly healthy. lost around 20 lbs but anxiety really doesnt care. i feel really fearful of my health and it really consumes me. i feel talking about it and being open has really helped me. so once i saw your post i was like i need to reply. hope you seek the help you need. if you would like to chat more, im happy too. let me know if this helps.

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