Scared to leave hospital

Posted , 6 users are following.

I was hospitalised after a suicide attempt last weeks Monday, in which I broke two vertebrae. CAMHS kept me in the hospital until Monday/today (which they had told me on Friday). I've now been told for definite that I'm going home and I'm really really scared.

Being in hospital has been the most stress-free week of my life. All I've had to worry about is getting better and finishing puzzles etc. I've had the option of 24/7 help from the nurses. I made friends and wasn't around my family all the time (which I enjoyed the most). And obviously since I broke two bones, I've been able to have everything near me and been able to make myself as comfy as possible, which I'm worried will be a problem at home.

I'm not going to fight going home, I just can't stop crying. I know I need to go home because I have no reason to be here anymore and they need the bed.

Anyone else felt like this and what did you do to make it better?

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6 Replies

  • Posted

    Yes I can totally understand that , it shows that being stress free is what you really need, it sounds like a blessing in disguise, you needed that time in hospital , not just for the broken bones but for the depression leave you alone for a bit. I don’t know what your situation is at home? It would be good to know a bit about that, so I can offer some advise for when you go home. Xx
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    • Posted

      I have an autistic brother that has meltdowns most days, a narcissistic mother and a teenager sister. It is quite stressful. Today is my second full day home. When I first came home, I broke down crying for 2 hours and then had anxiety. Last night I had anxiety and crying again. Distractions help but not for too long.
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  • Posted

    Hi Evamore - sorry to read of your situation. The issue of two broken vertebrae has my mind boggling. Have you told your doctor of your fears re: going home? There may be alternatives somewhere - it sounds like you need a long, care-free break from the trials and tribulations of life. 
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    • Posted

      Unfortunately I haven’t been given any sort of option so I’m stuck being at home. Additionally, I’m in the last year of college so taking any further time off (I’m already off for 2 weeks on doctors orders, otherwise I’d be back sooner) would endanger my already-failing grades more.

      I have been home for 2 days now and doubt they would do anything/take me anywhere now.

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  • Posted

    Hello Evamore...two years ago I went in for a big surgery while in there the surgeon cut my colon and put me in a colonoscopy bag. That's how I woke up. I was in the hospital for 7 days and an assisted nursing place for 7. They wanted me there for 30-60 days but they had no knowledge of how to assist me with  the bag attachment. I wanted to go home but like you I had so..many fears how could I make it alone...I am single?? When I got home one minute at a time one day at a time things worked out. Will you have access to home health where they come to your house and help for a while. I had them come for a week and I let them go. But I could have had them for a long period. With 2 broken vertebrae I would think you might need help bathing, etc. just a thought. Try to keep your  thoughts in the present that helps me. Good luck!!

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