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Self image post op

Posted , 22 users are following.

DawnDedee
DawnDedee

This is a sensitive topic for me, but I wonder how others are dealing with the body changes post op?  Right now my body is in the worst shape, and in fact, it is in the shape that I fought succesfully my whole adult life to avoid.  I have lost my figure.  I do not think, at my age, that I will ever get it back.  I had to lay around for a year and a half in agony with a failed THR, and there was nothing I could do.

I cannot relax into this, yet I lack the energy and drive to work out and I wonder if at my age, nearly 58, I can even turn this around.

I do not like what I see in the mirror.

Dawn, USA

 

7 likes, 133 replies

133 Replies

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  • HipsDontLie
    HipsDontLie DawnDedee

    Posted

    You are not alone on this, believe me, I'm 44 and at 40 I was in my prime, then my world collapse and I'm 50lbs heavier.

    We are winning this battle, in 6, 12 or more months, but we'll get there. I know that in my case I'll be able to walk! That's my goal go out of my bed and go for a stroll with my children's and enjoy my life, is the little things. Start with small goals, and you'll make it, because our minds are the most powerful tools, and prayers, and confidence, believe in yourself...someone very special to me said that long ago and now are my motto. You are getting healthier, you are getting stronger, you are brave, and you can do this!!

    Wish you the best

    Paula, Okinawa

    • DawnDedee
      DawnDedee HipsDontLie

      Posted

      Thank you Paula!  You have such an optimistic attitude and I actually believed what you said, that I am getting healthier, getting stronger, am brave and can do this!  Amazing how we can lift each other up!  And also the point that it is the little things that matter the most it very powerful thinking instead of me wishing I was already to the larger goal.  What a relief!
  • sarah1996
    sarah1996 DawnDedee

    Posted

    Im 20 and cant wait for my thr to change my body. Because of the 5cm leg discrepency when i stand flat footed my legs stick out oddly. Cant wear anything that shoes my legs or heels. Cant wear any shoes without my shoe raise in without a horrendous limp. Really hope the surgery helps.

    But im sure you dont look as bad as you think. Having bad hips means a lot of us cannot exercise or even walk much without the pain which means obvious body changes but im sure when your recovered you will be able to do all sorts you couldnt

    • DawnDedee
      DawnDedee sarah1996

      Posted

      Thanks you Sarah, and yes, thanks to you and all the others, I think I can truly change my attitude and truly sort this out.

      I am so sorry that you are so young and have to go through this surgery, but your attitide of being thankful for it, I know you will rejoice in being able to have even legs. And I pray that your surgery will go well and you will be wearing gorgeous shoes!  You will have to post a picture of you in beautiful shoes so we can rejoice with you!

  • donnarhi303
    donnarhi303 DawnDedee

    Posted

    We ladies understand the 'hit' to the ego with the hip replacement and recovery. I was expecting to be 110% perfect with the new hip and it has been a bit of a shock that's it's not. The support and friendship of this forum is fantastic and certainly helped me realise I was not alone in feeling crappy. Menopause had kicked in here too which is another 'hit' to the ego! My advise is pedicures and lovely makeup and perfume! It sounds pants I know but the advise you have been given is brill but just be kind to yourself for now and as your recovery improves and time goes by, you will feel better about yourself I'm sure. Weight loss and exercise regimes will be needed in the future for most of us but let's just be kind to ourselves for surviving the brutal operations xxx
    • DawnDedee
      DawnDedee donnarhi303

      Posted

      Thank you donnarhi303.  I do tend to beat myself up instead of being kind to myself.  I need to just allow myself to relax a bit and be grateful that, as you said, survived the brutal operations.  Menopause luckily hit me a couple of years prior to my surgeries, but it sure does change a person.  I have lost my self confidence.  Perhaps time will allow me to adjust to this "new" me and once I can grab a hold of who I am now, I will feel more confident.  I was one of those women who could eat absolutely anything that I wanted and as much as I wanted and I never gained a pound from it.  I was spoiled.  Now I have to work at my figure.  What a change.

      All of this is forcing me to redefine myself.  Maybe that is not so bad, after all.

  • LDW
    LDW DawnDedee

    Posted

    Oh the dreaded menopause!

    just to check .... Were the hormonal symptoms already there before the op, or have they come on since?

    it might be worth getting your adrenal glands checked out (a simple saliva test - not available on the NHS though)

    if symptoms are new, it could be that the op has left you depleted in the adrenal arena. This in turn affects the oestrogen and progesterone output/balance.

    its pretty straightforward to address the adrenal issue, which in turn makes menopause symptoms MUCH easier.

    am happy to give more details if anyone wants them ....

    • donnarhi303
      donnarhi303 LDW

      Posted

      Sadly the menopause symptoms started before the op. Mainly it's feeling hot hot hot during the night. Not in a sexy way haha! 🎭tell me more about the adrenal issue please x
    • DawnDedee
      DawnDedee LDW

      Posted

      Thank you LDW.  Interesting about the adrenal gland angle. Menopause began for me about two years prior to my surgeries. I too still feel hot at night and have been wondering if those cooling pillows really work.  I keep one pillow under my head and the other in front of the open window so I can keep rotating them all night.  I keep my window cracked open no matter how cold it is.  

      I could not take anything to help me through menopause because of a pulmonary embolism history.  

      I would like to know more about the adrenal gland.

  • linnet2015
    linnet2015 DawnDedee

    Posted

    Dawn

    Im standing next to you looking in the mirror and all I see is a lovely woman who has been through a long and difficult journey but who still finds time to support others on this forum with kindness and warmth.

    My grandmother used to say Beauty is as Beauty does and thats so true. 58 is no age at all, you are a strong, amazing woman and you will soon get your drive back to work out.

    In the mean time as Rose has said pamper yourself, be kind to yourself, you deserve it!

    Love

    Linnet xx

    • DawnDedee
      DawnDedee linnet2015

      Posted

      Thank you Linnet and I like your view of yourself better than the view I have been seeing of myself.  I have heard your grandmothers saying but had forgotten it.  "Beauty is as Beauty does".  How perfect and timely to be reminded of this truth.  I have begun some pampering on and off, nothing consistent though.  It is very uplifting. 
  • Rocketman_SG6UK
    Rocketman_SG6UK DawnDedee

    Posted

    Dawn,

    Actually, I'm probably in the best shape I've been for over 40 years .... but only because I got down to some serious dieting before my operation.  Not that I'm any film star, but I lost 70 pounds in weight (5 stone) over an 18 month period.

    My wife and I spent some of yesterday sending old clothes that were 12 inches too big for me now off to a local charity.  That felt seriously good.

    Over my recovery, I have put on afew pounds - how could I not put on weight with Christmas festivities, and a lack of exercise due to this hip?  I will be back to my pre-operation eating and exercise regime as soon as I am back to work.

    So for me, my bad body changes were pre-op, and at 60 I decided that I had to seriously change it, so I had to alter my eating habits to stop the carb, calorie and fizzy drink (beer) intake.  Instead of sandwiches and pies, I took salads to work every day.  Instead of beer, I drank wine or spirits. They have calories too, so in moderation.  Instead of bottles of drink on my commute I took fruit, which helps with any constipation due to any reduced fibre intake.

    Good luck Dawn

    Graham - 🚀💃

    • sandra16826
      sandra16826 Rocketman_SG6UK

      Posted

      Thanks.....my birthday is this Friday, I know I'll blow it then but I'm already cutting out carbs and eating more fruits and veggies....it's hard living with someone that continually tries to sabotage my efforts...I just have to be tough. 
    • renee01952
      renee01952 Rocketman_SG6UK

      Posted

      see Graham , there is this difference between male and female body - 

      it is well known that men tend to lose weight faster than women - not saying that it weas a piece of cake for you --- I am actually very impressed that you lost all that weight pre-surgery 

    • Rocketman_SG6UK
      Rocketman_SG6UK sandra16826

      Posted

      It's doubly hard now, my wife is here, insisting on 'elevensies', and other snacks.  Then there's our rescue cat Tobias, he eats around the clock, and is stil as small and fluffy as ever he was.  He's a British Long Hair, and oh is he cute, and has a 'meow' for every occasion.  I even caught him sitting on the parrot's cage, and she was trying to get to him to feel his tail.

      Graham - 🚀💃

    • Rocketman_SG6UK
      Rocketman_SG6UK renee01952

      Posted

      Um ... I knew there was a difference ............ twisted 

      Yes, apparently it is easier for us, don't know why.  Also we shed more pounds if you eat before or after exercise depending on gender.

      Graham - 🚀💃

    • AnnieK
      AnnieK Rocketman_SG6UK

      Posted

      What beautiful pets you have, Graham! Love the kitty trying to commune with the parrot.
    • Rocketman_SG6UK
      Rocketman_SG6UK AnnieK

      Posted

      Yes, she loves him, not sure what the outcome would be if he was left alone with her though, mind you, her beak is pointed and strong.
    • DawnDedee
      DawnDedee Rocketman_SG6UK

      Posted

      What I have learned in my studies at university is that men can lose weight easier because they have less fat cells to begin with.  We women have more fat cells because that is what creates those wonderful curves that drive men wild!  Ha!
    • DawnDedee
      DawnDedee Rocketman_SG6UK

      Posted

      Thank you Graham and congratulations on your fantastic weight loss!  I will admit to some comfort food binges during my year and a half of little mobility and lots of pain.  Cheeze-it crackers soothe my soul. But overall, I eat healthy and so do my children.  I was 20 pounds overweight and fit prior to my three THR's which is nothing compared to the 25 additional pounds I carry now.  I have lost 12 pounds since my surgery, and am not gaining any more weight, but cannot get below where I am right now.

      For me it is not just the extra weight, it is how flabby and loose I feel from not having any muscle tone.  And the cellulite.  I have never had cellulite before and it is everywhere!  

    • Rocketman_SG6UK
      Rocketman_SG6UK DawnDedee

      Posted

      But you are still a wonderful person inside that body.

      The body is just the cladding around the real 'you'.

    • DawnDedee
      DawnDedee Rocketman_SG6UK

      Posted

      Thank you Graham for your encouragement and thank you for all the wonderful you contribute to all of us!
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