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I'm 28 and I take zoloft 200mg. That's honestly how I can only write to define myself at this moment. The past week--I went off of the zoloft and I feel like I should hang myself every day I get home. I know going off cold turkey is the worst idea possible, but I wake up everyday wishing that I didn't have to face another day. I know I have to solve my own issues--try again. I know that i am in control of my future and my actions.
I've been through a lot- and now that I'm approaching my 30's I feel like all of it was for nothing. Everyone I have loved has left me- dealing with an eating disorder since I was 16 I have been unable to achieve what I wanted in undergrad- as I was hooked up to a feeding tube for a year when graduating high school and then my parents shipped me off to college and changed home in a new state. This was during the financial crash and now I'm reading more about how wall street and big banks are being funded again. I just can't see a future in which I am satisfied, not lonely, healthy and thriving in any way. History keeps repeating itself and I feel and keep fighting off the fact that I am fundamentally- alone. I probably won't have many people who can address this post with constructive feedback- if at all. I'm just typing into a void.
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