Single ladies and dating problems? ?

Posted , 7 users are following.

Are any of you ladies in Peri that are single and are trying to date having a hard time with it or is it just me?

I try, I can talk to a man for a couple of weeks then anxiety takes over and I turn into a freak. I'm also way more emotional and needy and I hate that, I do my best not to show it but it always comes out, it's like Im insecure.

Bothers me as I'd like to have companionship and of course sex but I ruin things before they even start. I'm scared this is going to last forever.

I also find that some hurts from the past creep up but I hadn't thought of them in years.... Im so moody with all these hormones going up and down.

just wondering if any of you have noticed this going on or is it just me?

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11 Replies

  • Posted

    i was there about 3 yrs ago!! full of nervous energy and wanting to please them !! best bet is be yourself cause i found someone who im now married to and he is 7 yrs younger than me im 41 and he is 34 so just just know its not you and you have to find someone who understands and loves your ways!! i am seriously going through all the ups and downs with this peri and and the pasts its Terrible I know !! i dont know if it gets better just 4yrs deep into this peri thing but just wanted to let you know your not the only one!!

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  • Posted

    I can't even date at all . Feels way to risky with all the turmoil, even though I am technically post menopause, by 3 years. My confidence is very low about the changes in my body and ageing. Besides even still having the hot flushes and the brain fog!

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  • Posted

    YES! I feel like I'm just invisible to men at my age, even online. I don't know what's wrong with me. I only attract like hobos and weirdos. I was on like 4 dating sites at 41 so gave up after no one responded to me. 😦 For me it's even getting a date let alone keeping interest. I also like another woman who responded feel so ugly and out of sorts. I'm not rich so don't have a lot of extra right now for botox etc and I have a giant fibroid that makes me look pregnant that I'm trying to get my insurance to cover a treatment for. Men can be fat, bald whatever and still get gorgeous women so I don't know what's wrong with me. But I'm so lonely I spend like every weekend by myself as all my friends are married and/or have kids now. My ex boyfriend from years ago also pointed out a lot of men still want to have kids so that's why they'd avoid a 47 year old like me. 😦 You're doing a great job if you're even attracting men and going on dates! And kudos to the lady who got a 34 year old. You go lady!!! I wish I know what I'm doing wrong or where/how to look. Thanks for bringing this up.

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    • Posted

      I wouldn't say I'm absolutely beautiful but I am thin and somewhat attractive. I still only get weirdos, I've even got to the point that I try to accept some of their weirdness as obviously I have stuff going on....but they get too weird. So it's not just you ☺

      our self confidence is low during this time, it's just part of it all.

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    • Posted

      Well you've avoided the peri weight gain!! That's a plus. 😃 I know what you mean about lowering your standards for weirdos. I've def done that. A little old mexican dude hit on me in a coffee shop so I thought I'll give him a shot, because what else is out there? And he turned into a creepy stalker who I had to block on my phone. 😦 Do you do online dating? Or how do you meet men? I could use any help at least getting dates. 😃

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  • Posted

    thank you girls for your reply.

    It kind of makes me feel a little bit better knowing others feel the same way. It's hard to have nobody else to talk about this peri stuff. I feel like a freak of nature at times.

    I even tried to explain to a couple of them about anxiety and how I may act weird, but they can't get it.

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    • Posted

      No men do NOT get it. They think menopause is a joke because they don't deal with it. They can have kids at 70. Did you watch actress Viola Davis on Kimmel? He actually had to ask her what menopause was. WTF Jimmy? She said "it's hell Jimmy" lol.

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    • Posted

      im glad you feel a little better knowing your not the only one!! believe me one will come your way that will get you in all ways of your life be patient !! kinda hard to do with anxiety I KNOW but it will happen stay positive an great luck to ya

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  • Posted

    Hi Samantha, I am not single and dating, but I can tell you that this phase sure takes its toll on a marriage as well, the mood swings, lack of sex drive and a husband who just can't understand any of it makes it a tough go among everything else. I could not even imagine what dating would be like seeing I have anxiety half the time to just sit and have conversations with people in general. Best of luck to you and all the ladies on here, I give you all credit for fighting through it.

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