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I have suffered with bouts of severe depression for so long now and I have always feared it is genetic as my mother has also always suffered with no relief or cure just shovelled the pile of pills her whole life. Well those pills
have served her well as they provided her with the means to end it all 4
days ago when she took them all and ended her life. The last 10 years
of my life have been hell, my baby boy died unexpectedly , my partner
disappeared without a trace and I dont know if he is alive or dead and now my mother has took her own life. She started the process on sat night
and she was found barely alive but too late on tues covered in her own
vomit, it had taken 3 days for her to die - alone. I am so racked with guilt
and pain I am tortured. I am scared I will go the same way as I am
tormented with the same demons as the ones which killed her.
She was found with a suicide note and a pile of cash by her body
to pay for her own funeral, how sad and pathetic is that? She sent me a
letter through the post and because we had fell out I sent it back to her
unopened out of petty spite, now I know what she was planning and
I am haunted by that letter, what did she say? Hindsight is an ugly thing.
Depression is a KILLER, it has murdered my mum and is slowly murdering
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