Some advice would be really great :(

I am an anxious person and a worrier.  I especially get anxious on trips away from my familiar area.  It's hard to push it away while on the trips.  I just do my best to really focus on what's going on, the activity we are doing, the people we are around, I've even cleaned my girlfriends mother's kitchen while we were there to keep busy lol.  Just anything you can do to keep occupied really helps.  If you have some earbuds, try listening to some relaxation type music or water/nature sounds when you can.  That reallys seems to help me just sort of calm down some.  And of course, read posts on here when you can to get reassurance that it's not just you.  We all get that way and there is nothing more than your anxiety messing with you.  I hope you feel better soon!

That's a long time to try to blend in with someone else's family. You are probably wondering how serious this relationship is. Try to share their joy.

Hi Katie, you've done a massive thing by posting on here.

Try not to think about how far ur away from home and turn it around and think of it differently as in its just a car journey home, don't dwell on how long the car journey is.

Have u called ur family at home as maybe talking to them daily or even twice a day will make u feel more settled? Let them know how ur feeling and a few texts from them again may help

Whenever I feel like u I just break my day into hours and think about what I'm going to do in those hrs. Before u know the day has passed.

Ur doing great, keep going xxx

Dear Katie. Just know that you're not alone. I made it out of anxiety just fine. There were times when I thought, "this is it!", and made peace with the fact that God had taken everything. From sleepless nights of inexplicable nightmares, to pacing heart and confused mind, double vision, losing stretch of time, brain-fogginess, memory loss, depersonalisation and derealisation, all of that and many other symptoms. Took me two full weeks to recover from the worst symptoms, and it was really hard I must say. The last, and probably worst symptoms is depersonalisation. I still struggle with it, but made promising progress since seeing a specialist.

I decided to seek psychiatric help, and let loose on my condition. I must say, being an outside observer of one's life and reality really sucks; it used to annoy me a lot, especially when my heart started pacing and I had to shift my focus to monitor my heart rate. You also pay attention to your inner being, start to question your own existence and reality. It gets so bad to a point that you even wanna curse the Creator of life. Sometimes you really just wanna die for a while.

Remember that only you can set yourself free from those chains of mental illness, but it's going to take time. Most people don't know this, but things like alcohol, drugs, meds, caffeine, sodas, and junk have taken our peace away from us. I had caffeine withdrawal before the anxiety, and it was the worst ever time of my life. I realised that I had brought in a fake energy (caffeine) to make me efficient, but nature wasn't having any of that. The psychiatrist I went to see confirmed that I in fact had a lot of caffeine in my blood, and it was only natural for my body to detox at that time. I don't ever wanna go back there hey!!

Hang on in there, well, at least for a couple of weeks. You will make it out just fine. What you're going through is natural and human.

"God has not promised only good; that's not how it's going to be. But a little rain mixed with God's sunshine; a little pain, makes me appreciate the good times." Walter Hawkins - Be Grateful ?

You are doing a very good job whatever it is you are using to get thru this. Just remind yourself you are safe and surrounded by kind and loving people. It is so healthy and good for you to get away sometimes and see you can and are fine.  The trip is just about over now anyway. Bri had some good thoughts and idea as well. Be very proud of yourself here.