Sorry it's me again.

Posted , 5 users are following.

Hello Archiemedes & co.  i have suffered for years from severe anxiety due to being 69 years of age & still a virgin plus never had a girlfriend. But we've covered all this in other posts.......What I want to know is why doctors won't prescribe strong tranquillized to people of my age. I mean we haven't got enough time left to become addicted plus they might help us with our problems. Why make the drugs if there not going to use them.....hello milly.....ROY.

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  • Posted

    I was going to finish the sentence with "we haven't got the titime left to become addicted" plus might help us with our problems & make our final years relaxed at last......hello Milly.......ROY.
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  • Posted

    Hi Roy

    I haven't seen any of your previous posts so don't know the background.  Could you fill me in? why do you think you need tranquilsers? which ones? Major tranquilsers like the anti-psychotics or the minor tranquisers like the benzodiazepines?  Also, I think you'll find that it is possible to get addicted, by which I presume you mean toleranace and dependence, really quickly, especially with the benzo's

    Hope you are Ok

    xxxxx

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    • Posted

      Hi Liz, I have a couple of previous posts on here about my problems.....the thing is I am 69 years old & have never had sex or a girlfriend due to (love shyness) severe social phobia. Talking therapy doesn't help & when I asked my doctor recently about it he said I would probably die a virgin. The only thing that might help are STRONG tranquilizers but he won't give me any because (he says) getting addicted to them. As you can imagine I get highly frustrated& depressed. I can't even watch the t/v if a really beautiful woman is on there I have to turn it off.   He gave me Ciprolex & all it did was kill my libido so now I can't even pleasure myself. I get the sexy feelings but now I can't even masturbate..it is highly frustrating but he doesn't seem to understand........Roy
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    • Posted

      Hi Roy

      Your dr.is quite right about the dangers of addiction, it can happen really quickly with the withdrawal effects being horrendous when you come off them.  Do you have an actual diagnosis of anxiety? what other meds have you tried over the years for anxiety?  I don't suppose there is much your gp can do about a lack of a love life.  I haven't had sex for years and count it as a blessing.  I used to be sexually active but the meds I take for bipolar put paid to that and I find, the oppopsite to you, that it makes me feel freed from my base instincts and much happier.

      Lizzie

      xxxx

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    • Posted

      Well it doesn't work like that for me. I feel severely frustrated. I was addicted to lorazepam for 19 years since I was in my twenties thirties etc so I know what withdrawal feels like......it was horrendous so why didn't he just keep me on them.maybe not when I was twenty but at my age now have I got another 19 years?
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  • Posted

    Hello Roy,

    Welcome back into the fold ,it is nice to see you again ,I don`t have an answer as to why Dr`s won`t prescribe drugs. Maybe some one maybe able to come up with an answer for you ,I hope so ,

    Take Care

      (((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

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    • Posted

      Sorry I have not replied before now Roy ,as I have just seen your posting

      Milly

      (((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

       

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    • Posted

      Hello milly,nice to hear from you again. How are you health wise the last time you wrote you weren't feeling very well. As you know I've tried viagra & it didn't work. Today I tried cialias unfortunately that didn't work either so you can imagine I'm more depressed than ever. I don't really know what to do next,the lead weight in my stomach gets heavier everyday.just wish I had the guts to go to a prostitute,not for sex just for a cuddle. It's something I've never done before.
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    • Posted

      Hello Roy,

      I am sorry you are no further foward in getting what you are wanting.

      I am meaning the right person in your life.Yes Roy I do remember all you said and of how you have tried over the past years and it seemsed to be all to no avail.

      I am sorry this is still the case,I do feel it for you .But there is something in what Alan 67001,says in his post ,he too is an older man ,as you are Roy. He is not just some young man/teenager trying to tell you what to do Roy. He is giving you what I see as sound advice,I know you have gone out,in the past. But why not try again Roy,get in touch with the two men who were in the same situation as you (those I told you about ) .

      They have been where you are and have now got themselves married and happily so . You may just want a cuddle as you say Roy,and I am very aware you cannot just go up to someone and give them a cuddle.So may I suggest to you ,you try going to an afternon tea dance ,you will find there are so many more ladies there ,than there are men.These ladies will undoubtably be willing to dance with you ,(you may say you cannot dance ) ok,but you could find you meet a lovely lady who is also there just for company ,and strike up a friendship with each other.

      I know Roy you have said how being in the company makes you feel ,but ,please give it another try.

      At the moment I am not doing to bad ,but my H has been very poorly ,and still is not yet better ,so that is taking me down somewhat ,thank you for asking how I am Roy ,it is very kind of you .

      Take Care

      Milly

       ((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((hugs hugs hugs))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

       

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  • Posted

    Roy, addiction can come to anyone at any age. So your doctor might be afraid of that. You also said you were addicted to lorezam at one time. As far as your need to meet someone you need to get yourself out. I too have never been married, 56 years old, but still trying. I was supposed to be engaged years ago but it didn't work out. 

    Where do you go to meet women?  What age are you looking at?  My suggestions is to find a place which has people who are close to your age and might be interested in you. 

    Just keep on trying, you will eventually find that special someone. 

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    • Posted

      Hi Alan. Although I was on lorazepam for nineteen years it was the best I've ever felt. TILL THEY STOPPED IT. When I asked why? He said we don't want you getting addicted & if I had been older they would have kept me on it forever( I was about thirty at the time I started it) Well I'm now nearly 70 so why don't the put me back on it........I doubt I've got another nineteen years left.
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    • Posted

      Roy, I understand how you feel. I myself take paxil with diazpam when needed, but trying to cut down. Medications are great, but not the totall answer. Besides being on medicine, I also go to therapy to talk about my issues and it has helped me rely less on my medicines. In fact, there are days when I don't really need anything. Are you seeing a therapist? If not, why? 

      My other question is if you have any hobbies or interests which might help you meet others. I enjoy playing golf for example and if I see someone interesting I ask them if they would like to play a round with me.   If it's a female and we have a good time I will ask her if she would like to go out, talk a bit more over a cup of coffee. Sometimes she says yes, sometimes no, but I tired. I also will try to start a conversation with someone in a supermarket or store and that sometimes leads to something. 

      My point is that you have to try things without being afraid for relying on medication. It's the best way to get over your fears. 

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    • Posted

      I don't belive in talking therapy. I am 69 years old & have done plenty of it. It doesn't work for me. As for meeting girls I am terrified of them in a social situation & would shake with fear. My doctor says I will probably die a virgin.
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    • Posted

      Roy, first of all I doubt it that a professional of any type would tell you that you are going to "die a virgin". Yes, I have had several relationships in my life, but that only happened after getting out and trying to look for someone. I know it's difficult but you have to do something to make things happen. 

      You also ask why they make the medications if they won't use them?  Being in mental health myself, medicines are only a way of dealing with your anxiety but should not be used in the long term or a crutch.  I know you say that you don't believe in talk therapy, but a good therapist can help you. 

      Lastly, you seem to be more intersted in having sex rather than forming a relationship with a woman. I don't know how you approach women if you do, but sex shouldn't be the overall goal of meeting someone. You should want to form a relationship where you can share life with each other and want to do things together outside of the bedroom. 

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