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Hi everyone. I saw my CPN yesterday and told her about how I'd tried to end my life last friday, and that the only reason it didnt work out was that unfortunately someone arrived in the same place in the forrest as me, realised what I was doing and chased me off. I became so angry at the passer by that it just completely threw me and I've been in a state of dispare, unable to do anything, since.
I've got no energy at the moment as I am so caught up in still being here, angry and confused at my failure. I'm in purgatory. I cant move one way or the other. This is why I spoke to her about it, but she didnt really have anything to say other than "oh so you actually went somewhere to do something?" and that was it. She then glossed over it and gave me some worksheets to complete around paranoia (a sperate issue) for our next session.. and said "Thanks, see you again in 2 weeks".
She offered me no help or support at all. I know I didnt actually kill myself but I would have if it wasnt for the passer by. I made that clear to her. But because I didnt die or fail in some other way, is this a normal reaction to recieve? If anyone has any advice on how else I may get help I'd really appreciate it, as I am just so so stuck.
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