Suicidal Ex. Help pls :(

Posted , 10 users are following.

I broke up with my ex in August of last year. Now I have a new boyfriend and ever since my ex found out he is texting me saying he wants to suicide. He said quite a few different methods and it's really scarting me. I had been wanting to break up with him for over a year and couldn't bc of this behaviour. When I finally broke up with him he was ok for a few months until I met someone else. Now he is "forcing" me to say stuff like "I love you" by saying if I don't give him some type of hope that I will take him back he will kill himself. I already called 911 on him once for this suicidal threats but they didn't do anything about it. Pls help sad what should I do?

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14 Replies

  • Posted

    He is being manipulative, not suicidal. Tell him if he continues to say these things you'll call the police and let them take him to hospital, end it there. The more your in contact the worse it'll become

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  • Posted

    Keep the texts that your ex sends to you. Next time he threatens you with suicide show these messages to police officers and insist on sectioning him under the Mental Health Act for further evaluation. You had every right to break up with your ex, people make these choices every day. Don’t blame yourself. The guy probably tries to manipulate you and a non-consented injection of haloperidol on a mental ward should teach him the lesson.
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  • Posted

    Hello emilia47047.

    Sorry your ex is putting you in this situation, it must be super stressful on you, my gosh. I agree with the other posters and also it does sound as if your ex might genuinely be struggling with suicidal feelings - which absolutely isn't your fault. Tell him he needs to see a doctor about his depression and then, whoosh, cut him off just like that. He needs to deal with it in a proper manner, not by emotionally blackmailing you. All the best. He'll be okay, don't worry.  

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  • Posted

    Hi Emilia - sorry to read of your situation. I wholeheartedly agree with the other posters here: this man is manipulating you. Great advice from johnkov about keeping the texts he is sending and any replies you have given. Next time, inform him you have alerted the authorities and that if he continues this harrassment you will take measures to stop him, including through the courts. After that warning don't respond to his texts. Block his number. His suicidal ideation is not your responsibilty. Finding him "hope" is not your job. It's his. I'm wondering what your new man has to say about this matter? Have you told him?

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  • Posted

    Hi and thank you everyone for your support. All my friends are telling me the same (that he is being manipulative) and to block him. But I'm just so afraid and if something would happen to him bc of this I would never be able to forgive myself for it. I care for him still but only as I would for a good friend. I haven't told my boyfriend about this, he is very sensitive and it woukd totally destroy him. I have no feelings at all for my ex but I'm being forced to reply to him because he makes me feel guilty and says he wants to die. He came to see me at my work after not seeing me for months and broke down immidiately as he he saw me. I'm just so afraid that he might not be lying about harming himself. sad what am I supposed to do?

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    • Posted

      If your not very careful you are going to find your new relationship is ruined because of this. Contact the police yourself, tell them an ex is threatening suicide if you don't attend to them and your finding it threatening - which is true, leave it in their hands and stop all contact with him

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    • Posted

      I did. He told me he drank bleach a few days ago so i called 911 immediately. He said he soon threw it up and that it was just a small amount. When 911 got there they didn't do anything about it. This makes me believe he lied about his suicide attempt. I really wish I could block him but he threatens me with saying stuff like "you will regret it when you find a corpse on your doorstep". He is driving me insane I don't know what to do sad

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    • Posted

      He told me he drank bleach a few days ago so i called 911 immediately. He said he soon threw it up and that it was just a small amount.

      Burst into laughter. If he drank bleach, his tong, throat and airways would be seriously injured and the paramedics would certainly take him to the ER. Emilia, for your own sanity, you need to detach emotionally from this person. Everyone here tells you the same thing but somehow you’re not willing to listen. Do you know what is the biggest challenge in preventing suicides? People who choose to commit such act usually don’t speak about it. Their behaviour changes, but they don’t go to their ex partners and say ‘oh, I’m gonna kill myself’. Your ex uses the fact that you would feel guilty to keep in touch and manipulate you. You need to understand that you are not responsible for his fate. Should he choose to kill himself – tough, but it would be still his choice and not your fault.

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  • Posted

    Hi Emilia

    It sounds like he's having a hard time getting over you! The blackmail he's trying to hit you with is his way of trying to get you to feel the way you are now in hope to somehow reconciliate with him.

    The best thing you can do in my opinion is to tell him that you will contact the police if he gets in touch. If he still contacts you saying similar things, ring the police Telling them he has become a risk to himself then block him and don't respond if he manages to get in touch by any other means.

    It's important for you to realise that this isn't in any way your fault. you shouldn't feel bad Because it's his problem that he has with himself, not you or anything you have done.

    i hope this helps smile

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  • Posted

    You can't keep interacting with him . Can you contact his parents? Try that .He is totally being manipulative . You are not responsible for his life . I would notify his parents and then have 1 more closing discussion,let him know you care ,but his future depends on his choices for which you are not responsible ,period .Know that in your heart also .

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  • Posted

    Hi again Emilia. This man is using your gentle disposition to blackmail you. You need to be tough about this and end it quickly and once and for all - like ripping off a band aid. Alarms should be screaming in your head when he is threatening things like "finding a corpse at your door" and "you be sorry" etc. Do it today. Be prepared to make a statement to police if he persists.

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  • Posted

    Hi emilia i went thru the same in 2001. Whilst i didnt have a new partner the threats continued at my job at home i was absolutely terrified ecspec as i dont handle emotions well and have suffered depression for yrs also which made it worse. I spole to a dr at work and they convinced me u cant control someone elses destiny. Only yr own. He may be hurting but my ex was and he is now happily married and i was forgotten once his depression and anger ceased. I had to put the phone down down one day no matter what the outcome as you cant control what path he chooses to take.. its hard but its not your fault if he goes thru with any threat. & its emotional bkackmail pure & simple.thts hard for me to say as i know how being suicidal feels truly... but we make that choice it should never be put on another persons shoulders. Thats not yr cross to bear. Ur in a tough situation but u have to put u first. Xx

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