Taking my life
Posted , 5 users are following.
Earlier this week i experienced an all time low, i went to work i couldnt deal with people there but i held it together until my boss said something to me and it sent me into a downward spiral and i kept thinking why am i here ? why am i living this life if i am hiding from everyone ? am i here just to benefit everyone else ? i am always over thinkig things and they play on my mind alot! however i have been fighting the urge to take my own life for awhile now until this week where i tried and sadly it did not work! i have recently been able to go home where i have someone staying with me, i have made out that everything is fine but really i was hoping that i wouldnt have to come back here! i am getting help but i dont feel any different. i just do not want to live life like this anymore and now i have no idea what to do!
1 like, 5 replies
ros23426 jess44253
Posted
Everyone on here understands and we can only comfort each other the best way we can, Identification with the dreaded feeling of wanting to die. We can't trust our own selves any more...BUT, it gets better, so hold on, take 3 mins at a time and breathe, it will get better & better until it's just a horrid memory. What has the doctor said? If you feel awful call the Samaritans they are great to talk to. Or keep writing on here, just spill it out!!! Rx
jemimah88932 jess44253
Posted
vikki47875 jess44253
Posted
Having been in your situation and knowing how you feel ...
Let me tell you a bit about my back ground.
I tried this last year .. I couldn't even tell you why I did it but I did. My 1 year old son was in the house and until I was passing out I didn't even consider it. So I rang my mum and told her to come and pick him up. An ambulance arrived 5 mins later and burst in my house.
The doing it is easy but the bit afterwards is the scariest thing in the world !!. I not only had 6 people in my house that I didn't no I also had my husband called home from tour so the whole camp knew I had social services tell me I wasn't fit to look after my children !!
Everyone has a reason to be here !! Is what I'm trying to say !!. Everyone has some reason they would regret it !!.
You need to let go of your why and keep hold of your why not 😳.
On a 'good day' you need to get rid of your triggers .. So for me it was getting rid of any tablets in the house !!. Someone close to you will always have a couple of pain killers so no need to stock up.
I don't no if any of that helped but a big one chat on here !!. Talk to people anyone.
I really hope things get better for you
Xx
anne240 vikki47875
Posted
anne240 jess44253
Posted
I am still here and battling. You will find that hiudden strength. I am not a strong person but I will not let depression win. I hope, like me, you will be glad the overdose did not work. Take one day at a time, like me. There are so many people here who know what you are going through. You are not alone. We all care about each other. I would not forgive myself if I thought you could not go on. Please try and find that hidden strength within you like IU did. Don't let depression win.
I know you feel now that life is not worth living, but it is, and I hope you will see that when you are in a better place with your mental health.
Keep posting as I think it will help you knowing you have our support and can help you through this dark patch. I have been where you are, and I know what it is like.