Thank goodness for this well moderated site
Posted , 6 users are following.
I am on another couple of depression sites (not on here) where foul language including the f word and even the c one seem to be acceptable to most of the members and even the admin.
Today someone even posted a very sexually explicit account of their sexual adventures which some members replied to and seemed to see as acceptable! Others agreed with me that it wasn't apart from the fact it isn't allowed in the rules either. The admin let it stay up with some modifications though it is still pretty bad.
I had a smile when I thought of it happening on this site and precisely how long it would be allowed to stay up (5 minutes). Thank goodness for this well and properly moderated site.
Would any of you have felt comfortable or thought the above was acceptable? Just curious. Thanks.
1 like, 13 replies
phyllis11904 hypercat
Posted
I agree. Some people share too much. If they really feel the need to be so graphic, they should find another venue to do it. I'm far from prudish, but I think there is a time and place to share sexual exploits and this site is not it.
hypercat phyllis11904
Posted
unforgiven hypercat
Posted
Love you hypercat, however I'm sure you're 100% wrong on this one.
One thing we have in common here is going through difficult stuff that pushes us to our limits. We look for any therapeutic outlet we can find. And there's the rub: What's offensive to you can be truly therapeutic to others.
For example, I believe prohibiting all profane language to describe something as insidious depression is tantamount to censorship. Sometimes these feelings demand colorful language to enable us to be true to ourselves. Did you know the highest courts decided that the f word is an essential part of free speech?
The question becomes how to accommodate everyone and I think the answer is an easy one. Just let people have the option to choose.
For example, profanity options could to be offered to each user like this:
Please choose what If a forum message contains the f word:
a). Show the message uncensored
b). Show the message, f words replaced with {....}
c). Don't show the message at all
d). Don't show the entire message thread
e). Block all messages from the author that dared use the f word
Could that be a way to make everyone happy?
hypercat unforgiven
Posted
I agree with b. I feel that words abbreviated with *** get exactly the same message across without being overly offensive.
Don't forget that this site is for everyone whether they be very open minded or not so. A happy medium has to be drawn to keep the majority happy.
We are all different ages, come from various backgrounds and cultures, so all we can do is strike the best balance we can.
The post I am referring to was very sexually explicit describing in graphic but uneccessary detail everything. There is such a thing as too much information.The rules on that site stated that comments were not to be 'sexually explicit' and everyone should be aware of this. I am glad I am not subject to that much detail on here. I presume this is because the mods would edit it first which is the way I think it should be done.
As an older person sometimes I am sure the young think they rule the world and they can decide what is best for everyone regardless because they are young. Maybe it's a rebellion thing I don't know.
I think if all of us recognised that we all have an equal right to be here and have our say, and learn to compromise the world would be a better place.
That's my viewpoint and I am sticking with that.
Ashley025 unforgiven
Posted
I disagree with you. I understand what you're saying but we dont want to see sexual material here. It's about our mental illnesses not about sex. It's completely off topic and this website is respected now but if they let that happen. It will ruin it. If we wanted to see that would go to another website those talk alot of trash. No pun intended. If they want to say bad words let the **** do the trick we won't see it but they wrote it and expressed themselves.
jmcg2014 hypercat
Posted
It just depends on the site and how people share their experiences. We're all adults so we have a choice whether we think something is acceptable and what we need. There's no right and wrong, just whatever it takes for us to feel helped and listened to. Personally it wouldn't bother me at all
hypercat jmcg2014
Posted
I respect your opinion. I think we have to keep in mind though that this site and others like it are for everyone and not just the few. This is for my age group, young people, those from different cultures, backgrounds and sex etc.
Believe me the post I am talking about wasn't just some mild talk about sex. It well crossed the line into pornography with all the full details coupled with foul language such as the f and the c word. You might be comfortable with that but I most certainly am not and I bet lots on here feel the same way and it wasn't necessary anyway. I think the guy was just getting his rocks off!
Like I said compromise is the key as always.
Ashley025 hypercat
Posted
I agree with you 100%. 👏 We dont need to see explicit material here. It's about our mental illnesses not about that.👍
jo651107 hypercat
Posted
Hello Hypercat
Just saw your post and frankly....I agree. I am new to this site, and well, i would simply delete the post with the profanity.
It isn't nice and telling someone that they are 100% wrong is equally wrong on all levels of what is appropriate.
Personally, and suffering from.PTSD, depression and anxiety, i think that to write extreme profanities in an environment such as this (where we are all wanting help advice or supporting others) shows a lack of understanding for the ethos of what the site hopes to achieve. It also shows poor judgement and an unwillingness to even contemplate the effect that negative and extreme language has on those who continue to try to be on an even keil.
That aside... each to their own. If they have to swear, then in truth I would not be able to stop myself from simply deleting their post. Period.
I too am not a prude, and my illness does not prevent me from showing compassion and support for others in my daily life. I just prefer not to have vulgarity a part of it.
Nice to meet you...lol
Kind regards
Ashley025 jo651107
Posted
She was talking about explicit details. I can imagine what's she saying. I saw it once and was traumatized I didn't need to know all the details. It should be banned. If someone feels the need let them put **** and that's it. No one wants to see bad language. It's a respected website. It would be just like the rest. Vulgar and trash. No pun intended.
unforgiven hypercat
Posted
I think I'm not explaining my point well, if you don't mind I'll try to do a better job.
These forums are just a computer program. The system could easily give every single one of us, our own individual option, to see only what we want to see. Sexual content? Each person could make their own decision. The five choices I gave were meant to show it also doesn't have to be an all or nothing choice. We could each pick "Yes", "No", or a level of acceptance if we wanted to.
>>A happy medium has to be drawn to keep the majority happy.
This is the part that's not true. There doesn't have to be a happy medium, or rules that limit us to the lowest common denominator of what we all agree on.
I hope it's more clear, I am certainly not trying to suggest my values are somehow more right/correct/important than someone else's. On the contrary, I'm sure your wrong because I *don't* believe that. But it's not you who has made a mistake, the feature needs to be added. It's not right for any one value system to be enforced when it costs us nothing to accommodate everyone (other than a day of computer programming).
wayne1962 hypercat
Posted
Hi hypercat - I've been on this site for a coupla years and I am heartened by the respect posters show each other. I can only recall two posts in all that time that i found offensive, and i ermeber them because they are so rare. Wherever I post, this site or anywhere on the web, I always remind myself that when I hit send, it's out there forever and might one day return to bite me in the arse - er, ahem - bottom.
Ashley025 hypercat
Posted
I agree I don't want to see explicit material here. Sexual adventures? No one cares they shouldn't be writing it here. That's nasty and this site is about mental problems not about nasty things. It's disrespectful. I always delete my account from those sites that have this kind of material. Because I know they're just like the rest.😑Thanks for letting us know this is happening. I didn't know I haven't been on this website for a while.👍