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They tell you to relax...

Posted , 4 users are following.

Cookiemonster
Cookiemonster

Everyone tells you to relax. Take some time for yourself, they say. When, exactly? In between jobs, kids, housework, pets and a boyfriend, when do I find time when no one is demanding I serve them in some way? If I do get alone time in the house, the pets bark and whine to go out, to come in, to get fed, to be petted. If, by some miracle, they shut up for a moment someone rings about ppi, knocks on the door selling Jesus or double glazing. If none of that is happening and I lay down to relax and listen to my meditation recording, it's flies. Big buzzing annoying flies. Buzz buzz buzz buzz. Or, like now when I am trying to use my phone and the Internet, technology is determined to play me up as well. Refusing to work properly. It's taken me ten minutes of swearing to write this message, and I have had to let the dogs out and back in and open the window 3 times to get rid of flies... Relax? Yeah right! It's no wonder I am a screaming nutcase.

0 likes, 8 replies

8 Replies

  • Davesoapbox
    Davesoapbox Cookiemonster

    Posted

    Cookiemonster,

    i know what you mean life is hectic, it is no wonder so many of us suffer the way we do, life now is all about instant action, I'm a great believer in relaxation therapy but I am ofen laughed at and told "and when am I going to do that". Every day I meditate, I may do it for an hour or 5 minutes but I do it, I sit and am aware of the world going crazy around me but I sit, I know that they can wait for me and that is my message to you. Stop being a slave to life, it's yours, in fact it is the only thing that is yours and yours alone. So let the fly buzz, the phone ring and the computer well computers would try the strength of the Buddha himself lol. And as you relax, as you meditate and your mind grabs hold of these thoughts and you feel anxious just breath and remember you are what is important. With out you who would sort the dogs, flies, phones. Stay strong, have faith and put yourself first, no one else will. 

    And if if you need to scream, vent, moan or just talk, we are here for you

    David

    • Cookiemonster
      Cookiemonster Davesoapbox

      Posted

      I guess I feel out of control of my own life. I know it's unrealistic to expect perfect peace and quiet, or to expect to be totally free from responsibility even for a few minutes. I could do with being able to ignore things more, not overreact and take it all so personally. I suppose like other things the ability to do that will take some personal work, strength and willpower. And that's the hard part. :-(
    • Davesoapbox
      Davesoapbox Cookiemonster

      Posted

      But you have all these things,you have strength,you have willpower. You just have not found how to use them yet. I have faith in you and know that in the next six hours you can find relaxation, because you are going to do me a favour, you are going to put a hair band or rubber band on your wrist and every time you feel despair give it a ping (not that hard no self harming here please) to remind you that you need to smile, take a deep breath and be in control. Try it and let me know how you get on

      David

    • Cookiemonster
      Cookiemonster

      Posted

      Ok this is a real problem. I decided to try having a quiet 10 minutes to just sit quietly. I told them all to leave me alone, I put a film on the TV. The kids and the dogs have already been out, been fed, been watered. Me wanting to be alone definitely seems to trigger certain behaviour in those around me. It's like they can't bear to let me take focus off them, even for a few minutes. How can I train them to leave me alone, because this has been the worst ten minutes of the whole damn week!
  • Katharsis
    Katharsis Cookiemonster

    Posted

    Yes. Pretty much yes. But inactivity isn't good for anxiety either. I am currently sick, and so I have nothing to do except worry and worry and worry and google the horrible illnesses I think I have, I mean seriously some distraction isn't bad. It's just a problem because it's either too little activity or way too much things to do and no peace nowadays. Like it's never right.
  • ann85529
    ann85529 Cookiemonster

    Posted

    Your life is very full. Mine was once like that. Now I'm 72 and live alone, and don't like to interfere with my three kids because they have such busy lives. They are all good parents and I am very proud of them. But I so wish I could be a bigger part of their lives. Even an email from one of them is a gift. They don't need me any more, and that hurts. I was once so important to them and they are out there being independent, earning a good living and travelling with friends.

    I have a dog - she needs me ! thank goodness.

    Your problems, big as they are, are temporary. Nothing lasts for ever and we should appreciate the focus on us while we have it.

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