Tightness again 😔

Posted , 6 users are following.

Hi ladies me again sorry.

So I'm 8 weeks post opp from a rectocele now and Iv been feeling ok for the last 2 weeks i even went to the seaside on Sunday with the hubby and the kids. But for the last day it's gone a bit tender down there again and it feels like iv got a mini tampon up there (sorry for the description but not sure else how to describe the feeling). Me and the hubby have attempted sex a couple of times and was successful but did hurt a bit towards the end 🙈 but that was a week ago . I'm just a bit worried now though that I may have done something.

Any reassurance or guidance welcome.

Hope your all getting there and feeling better.

Healing hugs.xxx

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  • Posted

    Good morning to you! I can't give exoert advice - only my experience. I am 7 weeks post op on Monday. For me the tenderness and feeling better - or worse - has gone up and down. At week 3 - 4 I felt dreadful and all had failed etc. Then I got a bit better and felt more positive. At 6 weeks we attempted sex - it was ok except there was pain - not at the wound but much higher - which was pretty painful. Then I felt all had failed again - didn't feel that I was emptying bowels properly - in and out of the loo again - just as it was before - and felt sore and bulgy.

    ​This week?! Felt a bit better. I did/do have aslight bladder prolapse which wasn't repaired at the same time as the surgeon felt he would leave it to see if it got beeter or worse then repair it properly later. I wonder if it has got worse and this is why I still feel bulgy at times and the pain on sex?

    ​I have been doing more, walked into town - which isn't far. Bought some bits and pieces and weighed the bag when I got home - 9 1/2 lbs which I would say is the max I can manage. My son has been here with his little lad and I didn't pick him up. When they were going home I couldn't pick the bag on the side up (too heavy) to give to them so I think tiredness plays a big role in what you ccan do.

    Due to go back to work next week which I'm quite nervous about.

    ​Have you had your post op appointment yet? I am still waiting for mine. I am sure you have done nothing wrong. The recovery time is far, far longer than I thought. I can't say I feel great at all - hoping things get better for you soon. Somebody will be along with more medical knowledge. Perhaps the instruction guidelines need to be re-written by people who have gone throught the op rather than by others!

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    • Posted

      Thank you trizwizz for your reply, your describing exactly how iv been feeling. It's frustrating not being able to pick up things and can't believe how weak I feel. I'v been having up and down days aswell and after the last attempt at sex I'm scared to try again especially as it hurt further up to. I had a feel last night and the left side feels more puffy than the right side and feeling quiet sore. Think I'm just feeling a bit frustrated and a bit fed up now.xxx
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    • Posted

      Yes, I knew I needed the procedure to be done. I underestimated how bad I would feel. Yes I knew it was major surgery but there wouldn't be a hugely visible wound. I did watch the procedure on Youtube (!!) so I did know what was going to be done. None of that really prepared me as to how bad I would feel!

      ​Today I will probably do very little after having family for a couple of days. I think this is why I am nervous about going back to work too. The thought of working a whole day is a bit scary. I do only work three dyas a week though.

      ​I think probably we shouldn't be feeling around too much as that may make things - if not worse - probably no better! But I do admit to doing that too!!

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    • Posted

      Definitely agree with you on that point, these repairs need far longer recovery times than stated in guidelines.

      They should be written by a range of people who gave gone through the op themselves.

      The coat to the NHS for repeat repairs most be mounting up!

      Also and more importantly is the cost to individual patients who have loss of health, quality time with families, and time and earnings lost at work.

      When it all goes well and we get some normality in our lives then if is so worth all the hassle and are so grateful to NHS for regaining quality of life!

      Just hope in future the guidelines change; that they are extended to allow proper recovery times to ensure healing and higher success rates.

      They also need to impress on patients the need for rest 'as if we were still in hospital for most of early weeks and that we should be very very careful when starting light household tasks. I also think that retuning us to the work place so early is putting us into care og our employers who really have no idea about light duties and we are very much at their mercy.

      Unfortunately occupational health has a conflict of interest as the companies pay their wages and therfore their interests are leaning more towards that of the company.

      So not ideal!

      X

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    • Posted

      I think for me in some ways it has been easier. I work for the local county council so do get full sick pay - which I am grateful for - as it means I don't have to worry. The GP signed me off for another 2 weeks to make it 8 in total. Work just had to put up with it!!

      Also being older means we don't have quite the same financial constraints as we did a few years ago. And I don't have young children any more that need lifting and carrying. There was a lady on this forum a few days ago who was in the states and had three very young children and had to go back to work after something like 3 weeks. That must be tough indeed!

      ​My only experience of occupational health was after knee surgery. I know what you mean that they are paid by the employer but again my experience was good. Although it was a telelphone consultation he was very good. I had certain concessions given to me. I said I didn't want to make home visits to families in flats with no lifts or those living in houses with upstairs living rooms - my job involves lifting bags. I was also allowed to buy knee pads and I could have got them paid for. I chose not to but that was my choice. Those concessions are still in place for me. It was put in writing that I had to agree with and is in my personnel file.

      Alas my job does involve lifting, carrying, driving & getting up and down off the floor. Light duties aren't really an option. I am concerned about going back to work.

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  • Posted

    Topsi, I am 4 days behind you and everything you mention I have been feeling this week, haven't got round to the sex  but the tampon the itching on the left, I Evan felt to see if somthing was hanging out but all seems in place, the operation is awful I had a A&P but every week is difrent.

    i am much better this week but just them feelings that you mention, it must all be a part of the healing xx

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    • Posted

      All the changes we feel aren't really explained are they. I've been up and down physically and emotionally. I think there needs to be another paragraph put in to the instructions give to say that you will be a wreck for at least 8 weeks and a link to this forum - which has been very helpful indeed!!
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  • Posted

    Thank you ladies I'm glad that I'm not on my own but sad that were all going thorough this. I hope you all feel better soon as do I hope I do to. Your words are comforting though and I suppose I just need to keep resting.

    Big healing hugs.xxx

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  • Posted

    Hi I'm 8 weeks a&p repair and know exactly how you feel, I have attempted sex but I presume from the swelling we couldn't go all the way, I work for the nhs and I must admit occy Health and HR have been great I'm not due back till week 12 and then on phase return my ssp has run out so I have the added worry of money but I no that I couldn't even manage a hour at work, I totally agree that more information is needed the silly booklet I was given states things that I still can't manage but before I found this forum I put a lot of things down to my age even though I'm early 50s lol , take care x
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  • Posted

    Hi Topsi

    How many weeks post op did you start driving?, I tried last night for 5 mins and the strong ache in my groin and lower back made me turn around and go back home.

    I don't remember anything being this hard when I had my hysterectomy and rirst rectocele 15 years ago.It  Maybe because I am older.

     

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    • Posted

      I drove at 4 weeks - but only about 10 mins journey. Had every intention of walking round Tescos too - went into one charity shop then came home - too exhausted! Drove home. The farthest I've driven is about 10 miles there and 10 miles back - that was a fortnight ago so at 6 weeks. Had a rest when I got home - could really feel the tightness in my groin and lower abdomen
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    • Posted

      I would say take it easy and always remember you have to get back as well! I don't have an automatic so had more pedal action to contend with - but it was still hard work.
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