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today i found out i had herpes. i have been crying for hours please help me....

Posted , 7 users are following.

teara32026
teara32026

Just found out i have herpes today i was just examined Tuesday and there was no sign. But today i had my 1st outbreak. I am really scared and lost. Just wish i had someone to ralk to i feel really embarrassed. Im praying it gets better. Ive told my partner and they dont believe they have it. I just feel so alone.

0 likes, 12 replies

12 Replies

  • triya1
    triya1 teara32026

    Posted

    Hey if u wanna talk about it u can call or text me
    • teara32026
      teara32026 triya1

      Posted

      Thank you i jus dont have a phone rite now..can we talk on here..
  • Guest
    Guest teara32026

    Posted

    I would be happy to private message you if that would be of any help. I know it seems scary and almost the end of the world but you can make it through
  • bree36367
    bree36367 teara32026

    Posted

    If you need someone feel free to message me. Of you and abr I will give you my number. Its awesome to have someone to talk to. 
  • sunshine44960
    sunshine44960 teara32026

    Posted

    Hello Teara,

    I'm awefully sorry to hear that but just know that you are not alone. Everyone in this forum has herpes or has someone in their lives who has it. So you did the right thing by posting here and you will get tremendous support in it.

    What I can tell you with certainty is after the "mourning and acceptance" phase things get better smile I got my first outbreak of HSV1 on the 9th June 2014 (it's a date I'm not going to forget easily) and I can tell you there are days I don't even think about it. Like you I cried alot the first weeks and thought the world had come to an end for me but after accepting it and reading much about it, it has gotten lighter and it will too for you like for everyone else in here smile

    Read as much as possible about herpes to help you avoid or reduce outbreaks. The more you stress the more risk you are at having an outbreak. It's maybe still early for you now since you are still mourning your herpes free body but you need to try and get to terms with it. You are a super strong person and you need to look deep down inside of you to find the strength to move on. As it's usually said "there is no need crying over spilled milk" You can't do anything now to reverse the situation except to get stronger and move forward. Build up your immune system. eat healthy, exercise, take your medication. One forum member here swears that fresh pineapple or pineapple juice has helped her stop outbreaks. I have also adopted drinking a glass of pineapple juice everyday with a multi-vitamine tablette. So you might want to try pineapple too. It's cheap and tastes delicious smile

    Concerning your partner, some people don't show any symptoms, this doesn't mean they don't have it, they are just asymptomatic. Some people however are lucky and test negative eventhough their partner is positive. So it's a possibility. You did the absolute right thing to inform your partner and I don't know your current dating stituation but it's good for you and any person who might want to get involved with you to know the truth. It will be difficult but you will feel better and they will also appreciate your honesty.

    Don't let this herpes control your life!!! It's just a minor inconvenience and you shouldn't give it the time of day. The more you focus on it, the more it will impact your life. Tell it to go to hell smile

    If you have any pre-occupations don't hesitate to write, I will reply and try to help as much as possible.

    Hugs and love

    • Sassy2543
      Sassy2543 sunshine44960

      Posted

      I'm trying to go to the doctor today to confirm that I have HSV even though I already know that's what it is. I'm so scared to tell the guy that I recently started seeing because I know it will probably scare him off. Right now I feel like the scum of the earth. How do you deal with it? I feel like I have no future and my life is ruined. 
    • sunshine44960
      sunshine44960 Sassy2543

      Posted

      Hi Sassy,

      First you need to be sure if you have herpes or not. Hopefully it will be the latter. If it turns out it's herpes, you have to know it's absolutely not the end of the world and your life is very very trillion kilometers away from ruin.

      Usually it goes through stages and you just need to let yourself go through them. Cry for your herpes free body, think about all the things you are convinced you can't do, get to terms with it and then move on with your life.The duration of each stage absolutely depends on you. If you make it feel like the end of the world then it will drag on. Just think positively, read other people's posts. It definitely gets better. I was diagnosed a month ago and I felt exactly like you and then I "picked myself up" after I finished my medication and my sore got finished. You will see. If someone told me I'd be here encouraging others, I'd have called them a liar. This just to emphasize on the fact that herpes is a little inconvenience that has no real impact on your life except you let it. It doesn't deserve precious hours of your life. You deal with it one step at a time and don't focus on the big picture then your mind will probably blow things out of proportion.

      I'm following the advice of forum member here who said pineapple does wonders for her. So maybe you can also try that smile

      You are beautiful inside out and you are not being fair calling yourself "scum" How will you expect the guy to view you if you view yourself like that? All of us, with herpes or any other disease for that matter will like to turn back the hands of time and change everything but fact is we can't. You can't live in the past daydreaming about your healthy body. You need to take things into your own hands as you are the one in control and not the herpes. So forget about the herpes, try to eat healthy to strenghten your immune system, exercise if you like doing that and surround yourself with positive thoughts. It's very easy to let the negative thoughts take reign but you shouldn't let them as they are a major source of outbreaks. Negative thoughts lead to stress and stress leads to outbreaks. So don't go there smile

      About the guy you are seeing, you have to inform him, you owe it to yourself and to him. He will feel betrayed if you don't tell him something this important and then he finds out later or worse he gets infected. You have to give him the choice to decide for himself if he wants to stick around or move on. As difficult as it sounds, you will feel better and have a clear conscience.

      In a situation like this you have to arm yourself pyschologically cause you may get rejected because of the herpes. Just know that there are alot of open minded guys out there and when the right guy comes along, he will not give a damn about the herpes. He will see the beautiful, strong, smart, funny, desirable woman you are and you deserve it all smile

      Stay strong and you can always drop me a line if you want someone to listen to you.

      Hugs

       

    • Sassy2543
      Sassy2543 sunshine44960

      Posted

      Sunshine,

       Thank you for your kind words. I am already feeling better about it because of this forum. What I am still very upset with is the fact that the guy gave me oral about 4 days prior to my symptoms and I'm scared of the chances that he may have contracted it. Everyone seems to think that it is a low chance because it was a one time thing, but I still feel horrible. He comes home on the 23 and that means it will have been a few days shy of 3 weeks since it happened. I will tell him when he comes home and if he hasn't had any oral symptoms, then I pray that means he didn't catch anything.  I'm just beyond freaking out. I'm ready to talk to him and let what will happen, happen. I just need support. sad

    • sunshine44960
      sunshine44960 Sassy2543

      Posted

      Hi Sassy,

      Yes you will get alot of support in here smile

      There is no need beating yourself over it. I know it feels terrible to think you might have infected somebody but you can't do anything about that now. Let's hope he didn't contract it. Just hang on until he comes home and then you can talk about it. Don't stress yourself out and yes that is the right attitude to adopt. If he really loves you, the herpes wouldn't stop him from being with you.

      Just know you are not alone

      hugs

    • teara32026
      teara32026 sunshine44960

      Posted

      Omg thank you its about day 4 for me. Ugh i came on my cycle so its hard to keep the moisture down before i had been using corn starch i read about it and it is very soothing but since my cylce it feels very irritating and painful. I have gotten better with accepting this but i just wanna get past this 1st outbreak. There's life after finding out you have herpes i promised myself i wouldn't cry anymore because that will not help me and it may make my symptoms worsen. I have cut all ties with past partners after informing them. They were terriblr guys anyway.
    • sunshine44960
      sunshine44960 teara32026

      Posted

      You are welcomed smile

      Yes I can imagine that it isn't easy with the flow but it's just for a couple of days and it will get better.

      There is definitely a life after discovering that you are infected and that is what you have to look forward to.

      Good you have informed past partners, if there wasn't any relationship potential in them then you have to work towards getting much better and the right guy will come along smile

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