Totally fed up

Posted , 8 users are following.

Hi all just to keep you posted went to see my gyni for a 6 month post op check up, I had a posterior repair last jan 2015 and when I came to was told I needed an anterior repair and hysterectomy that was done last August, I had a 3 month check up with gyni told her of lower abdo and back pain she said would not be to do with surgery she examined me which was painful and put me on 3 month course of vagifem pessaries, I finshed these in January, my Husband and I have tried to have sex 3 times and very uncomfortable. About 3 weeks ago started to feel as though my bladder was going to burst, but no leaks or urgency, went to see doctor who said to tell gyni as had check up the following week, I explianed toher how I felt and about the painful sex, she just was not interested, she said everything was as it now should be, and told be to keep trying to have sex and not be so anxious. She was not interested in bursting bladder, I had to go to see an out of hours doctor on Sunday and he could not believe I had been signed off by gyni said the very least they needed to do was scan my bladder. I saw my own doctor on Monday she is sending me for a bladder scan said could be scar tissue, she inertally examind me and said I have been made very narrow so that is why sex hurts, I really feel so miserable and fed up. I have told my Doctor not to refer my to gyni again as I have lost all faith in them. Sorry its such a long post    

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15 Replies

  • Posted

    lesley I'm so sorry to read what an awful time you've been having recently and feel as though your gynaecologist hasn't been treating you well at all. Please don't feel all gynaecologists are the same, with some research I'm sure you could find someone to put things right. There are Urogynaecologists who deal with problems after prolapse surgery. I don't know where you live but I'm sure there will be one in your area.
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    • Posted

      Dear Matron, glad you are backbiggrin Thanks for your reply after I have my scan I think I may be referred to a urologist so will ask my doctor about urogyni still feel like I am going to burst it is a little easier but very painful in morning wake up about 4am then 7.30 my wee then is lots nearly a pint both times. Sounds funny I know but Doctor asked me to measure it?
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  • Posted

    Lesley

    Poor you, I'm Very sorry to hear you are not having a good time with it all... I hope there is something they can do to help you ...

    Vaginal sex is highly over rated anyway !! I don't bother lol and now I can't if I wanted to.

    Good luck xxx

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  • Posted

    It's always so frustrating when they won't listen. Most of the time we are right as we know our bodies very well !!!

    Like Matron said try and find a urogynaecologist in your area who you could be referred to.

    I hope you get the help and support you need as it simply isn't fair that you been through all of this xx

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  • Posted

    Never be sorry for a long post,we are all her to listen and sympathise.I am 16  months post op Lesley,had a a rectocle repair and still struggling with sex,it is still so painful,was finally told that this op can cause narrowing and shortening of the vagina,well it sure did with me.Aftercare has been very poor and now have a worsening cystocele which  am loath to have reapired in case it makes my problems worse.I also had a very unsympathetic female gynae who said everything was ok.Hope you get your problems sorted xx
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    • Posted

      This is so awful and surely these women should have more understanding and you would think would take more care with the procedure this is ruining lives and could cause marital problems, good luck to you to Froglet xx

       

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    • Posted

      Thank you Lesley,fortunately I have a very patient,understanding husband but we've only been married for 4 and a half years and the last year and a half has been so difficult for us,since my op.We had a very good sex life before my rectocele repair but it has seriously deteriorated since then I try to avoid it as it just hurts and it really shouldn't be like that sad  xx
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  • Posted

    If your gynaecologist is unhelpful how about going with other people?  People power and a note pad in hand. It is very poor that at your most delicate state of being in these interiews the person who can help doesn't.  They want a notice on their door like this "Don't know why you have bothered".  They should be accountable to someone. Struck off.
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    • Posted

      Thanks for your reply I do feel very angry at the treatment I have recieved and am considering getting in touch with PALS at the hospital, you do feel like they really just want to tick you off the list x
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  • Posted

    Hi lesley, I too am appauled by your stuffering but not surprised. For yesra I had the same hospital and gyno tell me there was nothing wrong with my stitch line and that everything was normal despite the fact that sex was always uncomfortable and often painful. Over 20 years I managed then when menopause hit hard the scare became very hard and no longer elastic so even walking was painful and still they did nothing but offer anesthetic creams and suggest I keep trying. Only when I got the prolapse and was examined did the Urgyno tell me that this could have been fixed years ago, You can imagine my anger , all those years putting up with it as I belived what they told me - this was a top gyno and hospital and why wwouldn't I have believed them after all they were the specialists. So my advise go see another gyno or better still another Urogyno and seek more opinions I wish I had. Argh well I had my painful scar removed completely with my prolapse surgery and as such have lots of stitches. My urogyno discussed sex after I brought the subject up. I wanted to avoid pain and a hard scar again. He suggested using a dilo from about 6 weeks and plenty of natural lub to soften the scar . He did say it would really tighten up and Ithat my hubby would have to be patient and take things slowly but recommended the dilo to all his ladies to use first as we are less likely to clamp up and make things worst when we are in control. Not tried it yet as only 5 weeks post op but will start next week. All the best and don't give up, get that second or 3rd opionion nothing that causes pain is normal!
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    • Posted

      Thanks for your reply Tilley it really helps to feel I am not alone, I am awaiting a bladder scan at present and my doctor was so much more understanding than the female gyni and explained I am now very narrow due to the 2 ops, she has suggested the same using a dildo myself to try to stretch the area, I am 60 but still want to feel sexy and womanly x
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  • Posted

    I sent a reply but it was not posted because I suggested a certain brand/website where one might go to purchase a dilator set.  So I say now, just "google" medical dilators.  Hopefully you won't get some "improper"hits!

    I had rectocele repair at the end of Dec 2014.  Recently got a copy of the doctor's notse - apparently he also repaired an enterocele - which he had not mentioned noticing during any exam!  I feel like I was butchered.  Sex is painful like a knife. I'm so grateful that I have a patient and understanding husband.  We only try it about once a month. I keep using the dilators, but it's not really helping.  I feel like our relationship is missing something without that physical part.

    After the surgery I started having leaking problems.  Doing kegels which is helping some.  I have been referred to a physical therapist who helps women with gynelogical problems.  I'll give her a try soon.

    I don't mean to dump all this on you other than to warn others to really think twice about this surgery and look for other options.  But then I do read some glowing reports from some of the ladies... and I'm jealous.  

    Best wishes for a resolution to your ssex bladder problem!

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    • Posted

      You have obviously had a really rough ride Raesue. Fortunately issues like yours are rare here in the UK where all gyna surgery, particularly prolapse surgery is closely monitored in view of the complaints in the USA following the use of mesh. You sound as though you are in the US. In the UK the General Medical Council insist all gynaecologists have undertaken extra training (usually minimum 3 years) to perform any prolapse surgery and if they haven't they are strongly advised to seek help and advice from a urologist. Research here in the UK shows most surgery is successful. 
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