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So drained and tired of others manipulative behaviours, so much so, I have distanced myself as much as I can from people.
I think it disgusting that when you've given a lifetime of pleasing others out of fear of rejection and or abandonment it really does takes its toll. Used by family, by friends and by partners all wanting something from me. Not content with just me but what they can gain from me. From care to counselling, from being overworked to dropping everything to ensure they have what they want...safety, money, houses, my time and constant favours. Listening to them rabbit on about how life is so bad for them and knowing they are using me as an outlet.
My beautiful kind father passed away and left a maladaptive narcsisstic mother and sister to deal with who constantly talk about me behind my back and include me in nothing. Even when my mother talks to my sister on phone and I'm in the same room it happens. No respect for someone who gave them so much of me.
I was so distraught it brought on 2 cardiomyopathies. My 2 lovely boys have left home and the silence is deafening, they have their careers so rarely contact me. And I know from experience that empty nest syndrome is real and can and does bring about depression.
My career I left as it near killed me.
And was used by an ex partner for all I could could gain from me.
What is this all about to be on this earth to be used, disrespected and fundamentally thrown by the wayside when they've had their fill. Sister goes on holiday 4 times per year, who's picking up the slack? Me, as I am asked to stay with my mother until she returns. These are the same people who didn't think to come visit me in hospital when I was on life support.
What is it with people who have no emotional intelligence, no empathy for another's life, they know it isn't right but continue to do it.
I'm done with horrible disgusting money grabbing and emotionally manipulative users. it is soul destroying. I understand the psychological explanation for people like this and why I'm the way I am. But come on, how much more can one person endure.
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