Posted , 3 users are following.
Hi guys im tiffany, 19 years old. I havent been active here since the last 2 weeks because I thought I had recovered from anxiety.
Last 2 weeks I've been happy, relaxed, cheerful , ive been out shopping and I was so happy ti be my normal self.My ecg abd echo reports came back normal and since then I havent been having panic attacks.
No cheat aches, palpitations nothing.
But since yesterday I've been feeling really down.
Like everything around me isnt real.
My mind is constantly telling me im goin crazy.
I look in the mirror and think yes I feel different im not like others.
Im gonna end up being crazy.
even as im writing this I feel really tired and not like myself.
Its freakin me out.
I know it's my mind playing games and the over thinking brought this up but even when I'm watching tv im lost in these thoughts.
Also im a pretty religious girlabnd I'm trying to pray but I've been having really bad sexual thoughts about Jesus.
And it just... im so disgusted with myself I dont know what to do :'( I feel even God himself hates me now and he wont help me.
Im feeling so suicidal just wanna end it.
But I wanna live a happy life like I used to 3 months ago.Its been 2 days, these constant negative thoughts dont leave my mind I dont even know what led them on!
My family loves me to pieces and I cant hurt them or give them unecessary stress I have everything I need I have loving family and friends yet my mind is not at ease.
These thoughts juat came out of no where all I do is sit in my room and pay attention to them and its made it worse I cant just push em' away and do my own thing!
Its so frustrating I'm literally crying my eyes out what do I do.
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