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What's my point?

Posted , 4 users are following.

fbbuffay
fbbuffay

I feel depressed, not to the point of killing myself. At first I didn't notice these feelings and the bad lifestyle. I just ignore them thinking that its just normal, because I grew up not having a routine like waking up or eating at a certain time, its just always irregular. Now that im a college student, these irregularities started to get out of the way and also became worse, I just cant help it anymore. I suck. I dont know where to blurt these feelings out, even to my family and friends. They wont understand. I mean my family they all have their issues but I just know they wont. I love them so much, not wanting to bother them. I also have great friends, the friendship was good at first. It feels good having people who you can laugh with and share the ups and downs of life in college (Im taking up Architecture--- which is composed of things I also suck at but I just love it).There are times that I just felt that they hated me because of knowing who I really am eventually. They wont undestand.

Knowing me, I am very awkward person, NBSB, maybe also because of my boring life, I have a social anxiety, a part of me has OCD which adds up my frustration. Yet also a Crammer. I think the only good thing in me is that Im good cheering the people that I care about even though Im a pessimist at times. 

I feel depressed, not to the point of killing myself,  its just difficult, I feel so tired of everything because my life just wont let me live normal. I feel so pathetic, I know there are solutions as "simple" as pulling yourself together. People say that everyhting will be alright --->well here I am still waiting. I feel lost, I dont even know what's my point writing here.

Right now, I just want to breathe a great sigh of relief just to reset myself. Its is a great feeling tho it just last for a while. I wish things would be just as easy. 

P.S. So sorry for taking up your time reading this pathetic whatever-it-is.

2 likes, 5 replies

5 Replies

  • dawn57104
    dawn57104 fbbuffay

    Posted

    Hi fbbuffay,

    Firstly your not pathetic, anyone can feel the way you do at any age and under any circumstances.

    Secondly have you spoken to your GP about how you are feeling?

    The hardest part is admitting to yourself something is wrong. I know i have been there and only recently done something about it. with the help of some lovely people on here who support everybody no matter what. No one judges each other. That is what i find so helpful posting questions or just wanting someone to understand.

    Please dont feel alone i would suggest seeing you GP to talk things through.

    • fbbuffay
      fbbuffay dawn57104

      Posted

      Hi dawn57104,

       I know there is something wrong with me, I just dont know how to start pulling myself together. Especially these few weeks that Im living alone, my frustration are just piling up.

      I have never spoken to a GP about this, I mean here in our place GP are only for physical medications thats why I havent considered it as an option before. 

      Thanks a lot for your advice and support smile

    • dawn57104
      dawn57104 fbbuffay

      Posted

      Hi fbbuffay

      You sometimes just cant pull yourself together no matter how hard you try, trust me i have been there.

      GP's can offer many different services to help, why can you only get physical medications? Have you thought of a short term course of meds to help you think and be more clear in your mind?

      Your more than welcome, feel free to post a reply and i will answer when i can. smile

  • deirdre._03652
    deirdre._03652 fbbuffay

    Posted

    Hi fbbuffay....oh bless you lovey xxx

    Are there any counselling services where you are...there is usually a mentor to approach....( also..your GP is a good idea )

    You are not !! In any way..shape....or form..pathetic, never, ever, ever think or feel that....

    Please lovey. Get some advice and help, this should be the best time of your life...a stepping stone to a bright future....one thing to remember, we have ALL FELT THE SAME....you must have all of the attributes needed...so ask for help. Relax, things truly will get better...I wish you happiness first...and then success, think of your future prospects, you can have the world at your feet.....

    Hugs to you lovey...dee . Xxx

  • deryl44443
    deryl44443 fbbuffay

    Posted

    Fbbuffay hello,

    I agree with the others and all they have suggested and would add that the most obvious thing that jumps out of the page is an incredible lack of self confidence. Could I suggest you may consider CBT to look at why you have such low self esteem

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