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Male 56 life long low self esteem OCD over skin past acne and appearance . Took early retirement now almost recluse with no interest. Have been on setraline 100mg for 7 months but feel it only takes edge of overthinking and anxiety over how I look . I overwaah and just obcess even more since more time . I've read a lot of books but feel trapped still in this cycle which has always been in my life and often made me late for work and never feeling comfortable in my skin. Yes I know at 56 that's daft but I had cystic acne that left scars and then at 45 had total skin resurfacing that did zilch for scars but gave me hypopigmentation . I guess I should of addressed this aspect of MH years ago and instead of wasting thousands of pounds on skin treatments but was ashamed as it sounds to most that it is vanity 😞 Truth is I relished giving up a stressful job in social work field as I was sick of daily ritual of appearance OCD and overthinking on how I look to others so was never happy in my skin. I just don't know how my mind can re programme through CBT as I can't even bring myself to go out . I can't even find acceptance as to what and how I should enjoy retirement as I feel my skin has won as I took what I thought was easy option. I am not suicidal I just feel I have been a waste of a life and so unmotivated
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