What to expect from CBT ?

Posted , 6 users are following.

Male 56 life long low self esteem OCD over skin past acne and appearance . Took early retirement now almost recluse with no interest. Have been on setraline 100mg for 7 months but feel it only takes edge of overthinking and anxiety over how I look . I overwaah and just obcess even more since more time . I've read a lot of books but feel trapped still in this cycle which has always been in my life and often made me late for work and never feeling comfortable in my skin. Yes I know at 56 that's daft but I had cystic acne that left scars and then at 45 had total skin resurfacing that did zilch for scars but gave me hypopigmentation . I guess I should of addressed this aspect of MH years ago and instead of wasting thousands of pounds on skin treatments but was ashamed as it sounds to most that it is vanity 😞 Truth is I relished giving up a stressful job in social work field as I was sick of daily ritual of appearance OCD and overthinking on how I look to others so was never happy in my skin. I just don't know how my mind can re programme through CBT as I can't even bring myself to go out . I can't even find acceptance as to what and how I should enjoy retirement as I feel my skin has won as I took what I thought was easy option. I am not suicidal I just feel I have been a waste of a life and so unmotivated 

3 likes, 6 replies

Report / Delete

6 Replies

  • Posted

    Hi David , what to expect is a difficult one to answer as everyone has different needs but generally it's to look at those unhelpful and intrusive ways of thinking and behaving that cause you anxiety, deoression, stress or discomfort and look at different ways of looking at them and how to challenge negative thoughts and thought processes that cause anxiety.

    Youll be asked what has been going on and brought you to CBT, between you and the councillor you will identify those thought processes and behaviours abd be given practical advise on how to change them.

    You will probably get things to work on between sessions.

    ?Uktimately it's you who decides on what outcomes you want from the sessions.


    Report / Delete Reply
  • Posted

    Hey David

    I wrote you a reply hours ago but it seems it didn't go through. But I will do it again. Don't worry about your appearance. I know it's not easy. But just remember we are all human. No one is perfect. While you're suffering with low self esteem due to your acne others feel they have a few extra pounds or too skinny or too tall or too short etc. We all have Flaws. It's what makes us special and unique. smile I know it's easier said than done thats where CBT therapy comes in. They will help you and it does work. My mom has CBT therapy and was even going to leave my abusive father. She changed no one recognized her. She had confidence in herself and was now happy. So give it a try you have nothing to lose but so much to gain. Best of luck👍Take Care

    Remember everyone is probably worrying about some insecurity they have and how they come across to others too. Don't worry and get out of your house. While others are living and enjoying themselves you're reclused in your home. Just like me I have agoraphobia and I am reclused on my own home. I'm my own jailer and prisoner. So please get help I mean this from the bottom of my heart. I do understand you I feel the same way but it's because I'm depressed right now. Good luck🙌

    Report / Delete Reply
    • Posted

      My mom had* CBT therapy and ended up leaving my abusive father. So CBT does help. Before getting help she was insecure and a shy women, and submissive. After CBT therapy she was stronger and defended herself. 

      I hope this helped.

      Report / Delete Reply
    • Posted

      Thank you Ashley it's good to hear back from you. I guess it is down to me I just can't get over for someone like me who worked so many years in social work field why this has hit me so hard that all my surpressed fears and insecurities have bit so big time . I guess my thankless job and pressures and lack of support from managers didn't help so perhaps after the initial honeymoon of rest and tv has worn off my insecurities have manifested from having at one stage too little time to think to now too much 😒 I've always been a homebird but never sort to try things of interest outside trying any new treatment for my skin or products hopping that things would improve. It's a sad imitation of life and very shallow. I would of thought doing a job where I was dealing with people a lot worse of than me should of been enough but perhaps I was in the wrong profession because I helped everyone other than myself . What do you think makes you agrophobic have you always suffered with this ? I never went out other than work so perhaps all is not lost as I've acted now rather than have this eat into me when retired fully 

      Report / Delete Reply
    • Posted

      Its good you helped others but what you say is very true. Sometimes we need someone to encourage us and talk too.👍 Social Workers are overworked and underpaid and unappreciated. I have been Agoraphobic for 7 years now. I don't go out at all. I haven't been outside my house in three weeks. Before these 7 years I would struggle getting out of my house since I was 4 years old. All my problems started when I started school. I have Social phobia, and Generalized Anxiety Disorder. I start panicking when I have to go out in public so I don't do it no more. I'm a home person too. 

      Report / Delete Reply
  • Posted

    Hi I could have written this as I suffered severe acne as a teenager and have ended up with lifeling scars.  I think probably the only thing which could help you is laser treatment.  I looked into this and the dermatologist said it would improve my skin by 30/40%.  The only trouble is it's not available on the NHS.   If you are in the UK and can prove you are psychologically imparied by this then you might be able to get it free.  See your doctor.

    I too took early retirement (well I was dismissed at 56 due to illness) and haven't been able to find a job since.  I am however doing voluntary work in a charity shop and love it.  It gives me a feeling of being useful again and part of something bigger than me.  It also gets me out and about and provided company. 

    I understand the lack of motivation as this comes with the territory and is a very common symptom of depression.  But no one is going to come knocking at your dooor and you have to put yourself out there.  As far as your skin goes you must be used to as I am on the 'ugly' comments though I think as a female I probably get more than you.  Men can be very cruel and cutting and tend to treat women at value of face rather than face value which women are more likely to..  Ok it does still hurt but I have developed a sharp tongue and at the end of the day am fairly comfortable with myself and my skin.  I have had my share of bf's despite my appearance and have learnt that personality is the most important thing. 

    I hope this has helped at bit.  You are not alone.  x

    Report / Delete Reply

Join this discussion or start a new one?

New discussion Reply

Report or request deletion

Thanks for your help!

We want the forums to be a useful resource for our users but it is important to remember that the forums are not moderated or reviewed by doctors and so you should not rely on opinions or advice given by other users in respect of any healthcare matters. Always speak to your doctor before acting and in cases of emergency seek appropriate medical assistance immediately. Use of the forums is subject to our Terms of Use and Privacy Policy and steps will be taken to remove posts identified as being in breach of those terms.

newnav-down newnav-up