whats the point.....i really don't want to be here

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I recently started working for an NHS trust that claims to look after your mind and body. They also claim that they're the best NHS trust to work for. I had to resign due to the stress they put me under. Nasty work colleagues, lack of understanding from my manager….it was an awful experience. It made my anxiety levels shoot through the roof and since then I’ve had palpitations, and feel like I wish I could fall asleep and just never wake up. All this stuff about logging events to help prove what you’ve been going through is rubbish when the other parties can say it never happened. Really wish i could snap out of it but i feel like i'm sinking lower and lower

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    It's how we respond to other people that lessens our anxiety.  We can't control them but we can control how we respond.  People are born with a sinful nature.  They/we learn to be good.  It's an individual decision.   I wonder if you are having the same symptoms that I have:  dazed, dreamlike,  my thoughts are better when I'm asleep, feeling like I'm not here..really weird..but knowing what is real and what is not.  Thank God!  Learning that there's not much I can do to control the negative behavior of others but only my response.  Praying for you KinderKid.
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