whats wrong with me?

Posted , 6 users are following.

hello there. im sorry if this is posted in the wrong section, ive just joined. i was wondering if anybody can help me?

im 22 years old. im a male. i look after my granddad around 50 hours a week. 

my mum and dad split up in 2010 and since then ive never been the same. it was pretty much me and my mum. i see my dad around twice a month, normally for an hour or so where we go to my nans. he is happily in a relationship with his fiance. i get on well with her, shes a nice person.

me and my dad never really spend time on our own anymore. sine my mum and dad split, ive never been the same, like i said. i got a xmas temp job in sainsburys in 2010 and stole £300 out of the till. after my shift i went home. an hour or so later, i was arrested and was scheldued to go to court on the 20th january 2011.. i was released that night and it broke my mum and dads hearts. ive never stolen anything before in my life. anyway, the next day, i gave the £300 back to sainsbury's and they were grateful i didnt spend it and that i gave it back.

january 20th 2011 comes along and i go to court and i get a one year reprimand because its my first offence and i gave the money back in full the next day. 

april 2013, i stole £2000 out of my mums bedroom. she noticed it was missing and said please tell me you havebt spent it! i didnt, i had it in my room. i gave it back and she kicked me out and i stayed over at a friends for 3 days. i moved back in 3 days later and me and mum were on extreme frosty terms. i was isolated from my whole family. my dad found out and didnt speak to me for a week. he later forgives me.

sunday 14th, my hairdresser comes round to cut my hair. my mum was out xmas shopping. when she finishes, she noticed my penis was hanging out of my shorts but i stick it out there myslef. she rings up my mum earlier that evening and mum kicks me out again. i moved back in on wednesday after staying at my uncles. ive never done anything like that before. i know im all messed up and this is a long post but any answers are welcome. i appriceate any help.

thank you.

 

0 likes, 10 replies

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10 Replies

  • Posted

    Hi it's sounds although ur crying out for attention but all in the wrong way x
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  • Posted

    I am impressed by your honesty, I think that will take you a long way. Perhaps doing some activities that help you find some enjoyment and fulfilment elsewhere might help. Like a part time volunteering oportunity in something you would  like to know more about. Take care
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  • Posted

    The doctor told me arlier that i done the stupid things because i am depressed. if so, they does explain a heck of a lot.
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    • Posted

      it sure is andy,and it gets worse,im on a lot of meds for all sorts of reasons concerning my mental health,im lucky cos the meds do help, u just have to give them time to work,and its getting the right meds for ur needs, i cant live my life without meds,yes iv tryed counciling but just felt like i was going round n round so that wasnt a real help to me,there r so many diffrent forms of depression,its just try what u think u will benifit ur depression. hope u feel better soon andy :-) x
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    • Posted

      Hi Andy, you most certainly are depressed and it's totally nothing to feel ashamed of.  You've had a lot of emotional and family anxiety to contend with and the stress of being a carer should not be underestimated.  As 185 has said, the fact you are obviously a very honest person and can admit you're having problems will go a long way to helping you get through this.  Counselling is definitely needed and perhaps medication too.  Don't be afraid to admit you need help or attach any shame to needing medication, life has been difficult for you and its not surprising you're having trouble coping with it all.  Please make sure you discuss all the options available to you with your counsellor/doctors.  There are a vast range of medication out there and its important that you find the right one for you, everybody reacts differently so please don't be too influenced by us on these forums in terms of one meds against another.  Take your doctor's advice and please try to stick with whatever recovery programme is prescribed.  Good luck hon. xx
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  • Posted

    Sounds like you need a lot of love warmth and positivity sourounding you now. Counseling might help to begin and keeping yourself in the good company of positive friends and loved ones. Some of us need a lot of attention and when it's not given we may act out in an odd manner unintentionally. Try to stray away from the negative thoughts ampting you to do the wrong thing and listen to the positive thought bc they are there. Telling you to do what's right. You got this. 
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