Where do I turn?

Posted , 6 users are following.

Still sad and depressed although I've moved on with my sad lonley life.

My partner told me to leave him alone and don't phone him. I've stuck to my guns and have no contact with him. His loss not mine.

Anyway it looks like a court letter has arrived at my home for him also another fine for parking. Obviously he hasn't changed his address.

I'm sick of sending them back I've even sent them to his work place.

What else can I do before bailiffs come knocking at my door?

Why do I feel as though I'm being punished when he left me and abandoned our daughter?

1 like, 8 replies

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8 Replies

  • Posted

    all you can do is send them back with a covering letter informing them that he is no longer at that address and you will forward any future letters to the police with a complaint of harrassment
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  • Posted

    Hi sandy.

    How sad he's left you and your Daughter in this way..

    I know he said don't contact him but surely he has to meet his responsibilities.

    He had made these debts not you could you contact him to tell him to change his address. It would be for his benefit as well as yours. You won't have to deal with it and he will get his post.

    He can go to the post office and have it redirected for six months for just under £40 I don't know other prices all he needs to do is fill in forms at certain places.

    Its irresponsible of him to leave this with you.

    If he is uncooperative The C A B may be able to help you.

    You seem that your stuck and can't move on until late these things are done so to speak to him or even write a letter to him.

    Tell him your Daughter would not want the stress of seeing men turning up at her home that he can stop now. He's a responsibility to her!!!

    Im Feeling for you right now.

    Remember if the debts are in his name they can't take your things once he's left. He no longer lives there. If they do turn up tell them his new address they will write it down. Probably go there. They'll get that for future reference.

    Take care

    Vicky xx

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  • Posted

    Hi Sandy so sad, suggest returning the letter to the court recorded delivery advising that he no longer lives at your address and tell them where to re direct it too assuming you know where he lives.

    Best of luck NeilĀ 

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    • Posted

      Hi I don't know where he has move to. Im so fed up I just want to forget him.

      He just up and left turn everything off in the house. After 20 years together. He use to be so kind and loving. He broke my heart and destroyed his daughter neither of us know the reason he really left.

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  • Posted

    Hi Sandy - You're feeling punished because you are a whirlpool of emotions after an ubrupt and disruptive end to your 20 year relationship with that man. Your life is sad and lonely at the moment because you are making a transition - from a landscape of turmoil to a clean slate where you can start again. It's not easy - but it's worth it. Hind sight will prove that to you.

    As regards the court letters, do what you have been doing, send them back marked "not at this address." I would assume that if he continues illegally parking - and whatever else - and getting tickets, the bailiffs will come. Tell them the situation - he walked out on you and and your daughter, the relationship is finished, he doesn't live there anymore and will not live there again. I would suspect that if he continues dodging his fines a warrant will be issued for his arrest. 

    Meanwhile, soldier on. Forget about a reason as to why he left - he probably doesn't have one that isn't totally selfish. Stick to your path of non-contact - he has chosen what he wants and he wants it without you or your daughter. You're better off without him. Things will get better, you'll get stronger, and a new life will open for you. Don't let the letters upset you - they are not your problem.

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