Why should I feel like this? Is this depression?
Posted , 4 users are following.
Hi people can any of you experts on here help? I have just been on a long needed holiday to return to all the usual rubbish! My neighbour looked after our cat whilst we were away. She informed me that she is moving and immediately felt sad, jealous and very upset. I feel numb and down. I hurt, she has everything, a child, which I pine for daily, cats and a new life. Part of me feels jealousy. Part of me doesn't understand. I feel so so sad. It's her life I understand that but I feel at 45 I have done nothing with my life and I have lost my little boy or girl to save face of another man's family. It makes me feel sick, to my stomach. Will this ever stop hurting? Is this depression though? That I don't know. Can anyone please tell me.
1 like, 4 replies
phyllis11904 sam18386
Posted
You should see your doctor and discuss your feelings with him. Only a medical professional should try to diagnose your condition. If he think meds may help, he can prescribe them for you. You haven't said much about your life in general such as family, friends, job etc. If you are just unhappy with your current lifestyle you should socialize more with friends and do things that you enjoy. Find activities that make you happy and pursue them. Wish your neighbour well with his move and look forward to what comes next. Good luck.
Heartbleed sam18386
Posted
Hi Sam
I don't think you are suffering from depression, I think IMHO that you are lonely. It sounds to me that you live alone with your cat. Are there any local clubs or organizations you could join? I think you need more social contact than you are getting at the moment.
Regards Heartbleed.
hypercat sam18386
Posted
It could well be depression as you are only concentrating on the negative and not the positive. It sounds like you have a nice place to live, you have been on holiday so you obviously have family/friends you can go away with and you also have a cat. There is a lot there to be grateful for.
It is a mugs game to compare yourself to others as you know. You don't know the full details of your neighbours life and the pain she might be feeling after all do you. I think this is triggered coz you lost your child - I am not sure of the circumstances there but would guess you had an abortion? Did you allow yourself to grieve for your loss? Maybe some bereavement counselling is the way forward for you?
I wish you the best. x
sam18386 hypercat
Posted
Hi people, thanks for your comments, my doctor has already said I have depression, she is monitoring it. I do concentrate on the negative sometimes but like I explained this lack of child thing has hit me hard. I am Catholic, an abortion was an absolute no-no and still is! I feel terrible that people think I would do that, this is murder to my head. I was forced to take the morning after pill, so my then rotten pig of q boyfriend could 'save face' against his family, never mind me. Now you'll all maybe see whilst the child thing is crushing. Luckily I don't live alone I do have a husband, lots of people around me, but the one person I need isn't here and my mum doesn't care about it. I feel alone in this. Totally, so thanks to people on these forums who keep me going.