Wondering if im becomming agraphobic

Posted , 10 users are following.

Hi everyone

Since struggling with menopause and having to give up work....also of Not feeling up to wanting to do much of anything,i seem to have got where im doing nothing,its suddenly dawned on me how isolated i am....to thé point where im Not even wanting to see my partner(living together 15 years)

Im post menopause age 51...

Can anyone relate,im concerned....

3 likes, 15 replies

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15 Replies

  • Posted

    Hi Lisa very much I'm kind isolated I know how you feel I live alone talk to my friends on the phone. When it comes to meeting them ain't going and I would love too. They know what I'm going through hopefully they will bear with me,I want to brake the cycle and invite my friend round soon meno messes with your brain I think we have to push through this horrible time I go out not far to the Doctor shops and home,try to keep busy cleaning the house watching TV listening to music but still need to do more with myself,nothing is not happening to us having to keep telling ourselves that everyday probably to get on with life it's hard we will be OK hugs xxx
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  • Posted

    Hi Lisa,

    I too understand what it feels like to become isolated. I am quite a sensitive type, aged 50 and still peri at the moment. The wanting to stay in and keep to myself thing has happened gradually and has gotten worse over the past 3 years or so. Quite honestly I feel that it might be kind of natural for some of us to want to do that at this time of life. I feel that its a bit like the nesting instinct, just wanting to curl up a bit until it is all over and done with. I have low energy and confidence at the moment as well. I see that you are post meno though. Could it be early post meno where the hormones are still a bit all over the place? If so, the same might apply. I also had to ask myself if I was depressed and if maybe some parts of my life were not as I would have wished them to be, also if there was stuff left over from my past that maybe needed emotional healing. I looked and decided that I possibly needed to see a counsellor. Mine is fantastic and I am so grateful for her support right now. But that's me and may not be you at all. Still, maybe honouring this right of passage is necessary, allowing the need for alone time for a while rather than being down on ourselves about it. I might be inclined to ask myself if depression for other reasons might be in the mix too though. A dedicated bit of talk time, even if it is on the phone, might be useful??? Sending you huge hugs. X x X

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  • Posted

    Dear lisa326. Don't let this menopause hell ruin your relationship hun!!! The way you are feeling is NOT the real you - it is mother nature overwhelming the real lisa with hormone irregularities. I say this in a supportive way (not telling you what to do) but I would see if your gp surgery have a meno specialist doc or nurse & make an appt to see them asap. Failing that see your own gp asap. I think you may benefit from hrt. Maybe try to explain to your partner what you are going through & to try & "bear with you" while you seek professional help to bring back the real lisa & try & get some control of meno symptoms back. I'm so sorry you've had to give up work because of this, I understand how you feel as I am currently off work unwell with a couple of other non perimeno related illnesses which makes me feel isolated; my work is a very social place to be & many of my friends are there. Are you able to keep in touch with any friends from work to help you stop feeling so isolated? xxx
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  • Posted

    Hello Lisa,  Yes, I have stopped doing things too.  I rarely leave the house anymore, except to go to the doctor, and to the store.  I talk to friends, but don't go out to lunch or even shopping anymore.  I have stopped doing things I love, and I don't know why...even feeding the birds!  I don't understand it.  I do have other health issues as well, but I have never let that bother me before.  Maybe just tired finally?
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  • Posted

    Lisa I was the same and had to force myself out - found it easier to be around those I did not know - volunteering at the op shop was the start to getting me slowly back to work and physical activity. We are also very isolated where we live and far from family. Take things slowly hrt diet exercise and communication are a huge help - be kind to yourself just now - well alwayssmile

    Loui

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    • Posted

      Hi Loui

      Yeah iv thought about that....volunteering,thing is,thinking isnt good enough is it....got to make it happen..i didnt opt for hrt as i suffer from migraines,i have Changed my diet( my Body stopped being able to tolerate alcohol,in that One glass of Dinner wine knocks me out for a few days)so Thats out....i really feel different towards my Partner tho....im at a loose end with that One,....and i cant seem to tolerate dirt,germs,that Kind of thing....

      Thanks for replying Loui x

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  • Posted

    The right antidepressant could turn things around for you 100%. I know because I've been there and I feel like I got my life back, that I'm myself again. No zombie feeling, just relaxed, more energy, able to socialize again, able to SMILE again. For me it was/is citalopram. I no longer hide from the world in bed, often literally curled in a ball. Please see your doctor. My heart breaks for you.

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    • Posted

      T.Sage and Lisa...Citalopram is a good medication, and does work wonders!  I have actually been on it for 3 years, recently going through my Mom's illness, and her moving away, has turned me upside down, and will be making a change in the dose I am taking, and will be on my way to feeling much better once again soon!  T.Sage is right, it really can turn things around, and help get your life back!!  Wouldn't hurt to give your doctor a call.  Good luck!!

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  • Posted

    Hi Lisa there has been suggestion of anti-dep - from my situation these made things worse - totally took away libido and any closeness with my husband. Off them again and just taking HRT - mostly all good - finallysmile I found dthey took away sadness, but also joy I was just numb and a non feeling human - buy just my thoughts - they obviously make a wonderful difference to somesmile

    Loui 

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