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i am still worried about my gf sister that she meant take my son of me

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  • Posted

    Hi Paul how are you doing?

    I'm sorry you're still worried about your girlfriend's sister taking your son, but it's just not going to happen.

    You're his dad. As long as you are providing him with a safe home environment, feeding him, clothing him and making sure he is bathing and sleeping adequately, there's nothing at all anyone can do to take your son from you.

    You aren't abusive or neglectful towards your son.

    You aren't doing anything wrong.

    You and your boy are just grieving at the moment so life is bound to be a bit messed up, things won't all be working perfectly, but as long as he is safe and his basic needs are being met there is no way anyone can take your son.

    You just keep on doing the best you can my lovely, and remember we are all here for you.

    Thinking of you.

    Best wishes xxx

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    • Posted

      Why does your friend think you need a solicitor?

      Has your girlfriend's sister repeated the threat of taking your son?

      Look she really doesn't have a leg to stand on, I don't know why she even wants to raise this issue.

      I'm sure you said you'd sought advice from some organisation before?

      If it will ease your mind then maybe do seek out some legal advice so then you KNOW that nothing is going to happen, and you can brush off her threats and get on with your life with your son.


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    • Posted

      Calm down a bit Paul, take a deep breath and try and look at this rationally.

      You are the father of your son.

      You are making sure he isn't hungry.

      You are making sure he has clean clothes.

      You are making sure he gets some sleep.

      You are making sure he is safe.

      You are not neglecting your son so there's no reason she could take your son.

      So it's not going to happen.

      And you aren't going to end your life because your son needs you and loves you, and you love him.

      Come on Paul my darling, try and keep it together.

      You can do this.


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    • Posted

      Do you mean your girlfriends sister physically coming to your door?

      Or problems coming to your door?

      Because you can do something about the former, you don't need to see or speak to her if you don't want to. I think it's important that your son still keeps in contact with her (providing she is a safe person for him to be around) because its a connection to his mum, but you don't have to be actively involved with her.

      You don't have to take her advice or listen to her threats, just be polite but be firm. This is your life with your son and whilst she can be part of it, she can't dictate how you want to do things.

      It's perfectly acceptable for you to put limits on the amount of time your son spends with her, for you to tell her she can't just pop by unannounced, for you to not see her when you don't want to.

      I think you need to speak to somebody who can give you some clarity on the situation so that you don't have all of this worry. A doctor maybe?

      Do you have anyone to offer you further support?

      You do not need this added worry on top of your grief.


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    • Posted

      Well that's really good news, I hope it eases your mind and brings some certainty to the situation, so you can concentrate on you and your son and your future together.

      Take care, and let us know how you get on xx

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  • Posted

    Hi Paul. Some good advice there from Audrey. Also, for some assurance, you might want to have chat with someone from the Citizen's Advice Bureau. They will be able to tell you what your gf's sister can and can't do (can't do much at all really, as you are a good Dad!).

    If you are feeling the strain, a trip to the Doc is also in order. Your son needs you - he would be devestated if anything happened to you, and you would no longer be around to look after him.

    Hope your trip to the cop shop went well today. That's good that you have made a report - that will now be on record that you are being hassled by this woman.

    Take care. xx

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