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Does my Ex GF have bipolar ?

Posted , 3 users are following.

hangcool
hangcool

Hi All, I need some advice and guidance and I hope I have come to the right place.  

I met my gf on Nov 2014 and things were great for the first month and a half and it started to gradually become worse.  Her patience for me started dropping quite drastically and towards the end of the relationship, whenever I say something during our altercations, she would snap.  She has walked out of the restaurant on me a few times and hung up, break up with me more than I can remember.  I think its almost a weekly / bi weekly occurance.  

Now I know our relationship is on rocky grounds and there was a fair bit of argument.  Most of them (90%) would just be me trying to defend myself when I have been wrongly accused.  For example, she told me we should take a trip to somewhere for the long weekend and I said okay and proceeded to take leave on Monday so it became a long weekend. When I told her about it and asked if she had taken her leave, she got instantly defensive and said I had not planned anything.  I told her I couldn't make any reservations because I didnt know if she can take any leave.  She then proceeded to tell me that her company does not allow people to take leave before Australia Day (Tuesday) and after that she started saying I heard wrongly.  There are lot of incidents like this whereby she would simply throw everything back in my face.  Sometimes I just keep calm about it and other times I try to get my poin across but it always end up with her getting angry and hanging up on me, or just walking off.  

She is also a very controlling person whereby she would get angry whenever I do something she doesnt like, e.g playing games (20 mins) or playing with my phone (even though she is on the phone almost exclusively).

She broke up with me about 3 weeks ago and had blocked me for about 1.5 weeks.  We had some email correspondence whereby she sent a barrage of messages with personal attacks about me.  She asked me to go kill myself several times and also told me that she hopes I get hit by a car.  I did send her flowers after that and she unblocked me and thank me for the flowers.  We had a very flat line conversation and she told me that its over and I should move on.  I told her I was sorry and I'd like to make it up to her.  After about 8 hours she replied telling me she's free that night so I asked her if we could catch up and she said she wanted to go watch a movie.  Within a span our 30 mins she said she didnt want to go so I said okay that she can just rest for the day.  The next day thinking that we might be able to reconcile, i sent her a message asking what her plans are for the day and she wrote back saying it's over, she doesnt want to see or hear from me, doesnt want to have anything to do with me.  I said again then I am sorry for whatever I have done in the relatioship and I would try harder.  9 hours later she would just message me asking me if im there.  We had a quick chat and left it there.  The next day I asked her to come over for dinner (Chinese New Year Eve) and she agreed to come over.  The night went quite well and she mentioned that if she didnt have to work the next day she would stay.  She also said she will be back in the next few days.  The following day I told her i had to drop something off but she said she didnt want to see me but then later she said its okay to come drop it off.  When i got there, I gave it to her and asked if we could have a chat, she got angry and said its over.  We talked about 5 mins before she went back home.

That night she sent me a message again telling me to dissapear from her life and that she likes someone else, said she doesnt like me and never will.  She said she hated me and then proceeded to block me.

I just wanted to know that a few days before she broke up with me, we were even discussing marriage, we went to look at wedding rings, checked out real estate sites for houses etc.

I am just perplexed by the sudden shift in her behaviour and even more alarming was after I sent her flowers, she unblocked me and her mood went back and forth.  During our relationship together, she would often tell me she feels hopeless, sometimes about the relationship, sometimes about her life, sometimes about her job.  I havent really took much notice until recently.  I wanted to know if a person has bipolar, does it only affect relationship or will it affect other aspects as well ?  I don't really hang out with her friends so I don't know that side of things but I do know she has altercations with people at work, the building manager where she lives in.

I'd like to help her if she really has bipolar.  Though we've broken up I still care deeply for her.

0 likes, 3 replies

3 Replies

  • Natnat89
    Natnat89 hangcool

    Posted

    Honestly, it sounds like the only way you can help her is to get her to a physchiatrist. It sounds like she has some sort of mental disorder but it sounds more serious than bipolar. It could be a more severe form. Mentioning a psychiatrist will probably upset her, it usually does to anyone suffering a mental disorder, but I would try to tell her it's for her own good. If she doesn't respond and refuses to seek medical help, there's nothing else you can do. She can only be helped if she wants to be helped. In the meantime, if you can't get her to seek the help she needs, I would move on. You may have loved this girl but it sounds like she is very unstable and without the proper medication/treatment, a successful relationship with her sounds unlikely. I hope this helps!
  • lisalisa67
    lisalisa67 hangcool

    Posted

    Without knowing you and your part in this and her personally no one can diagnose your ex.you clearly are not a healthy couple.
  • chris11182
    chris11182 hangcool

    Posted

    i have read your statement, and feel she is bipolar, my ex was, constantly getting me arrested, for beating her up, never did. its a bloody heartbreaker. one min your greatest then next not worth dog sh*t on her shoe. i spent so much time with this woman and i loved her to the core, but having said that, the depression rubbed off on me.used to make a point of making her laugh at least once a day. but the other person would reservice. you cannot bargain or reason, she babbled so fast she could not get her words out fast enough. then exploded on me. i treat her like gold but, i had to walk away. was sending me nuts because i had to double take all i said and did. was hardest thing ive ever done but had to call it a draw. heart was and still is broken

     

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