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Did it kill the "seks"?

Posted , 12 users are following.

belleAUSSydney
belleAUSSydney

I understand that some might not want to respond to this post. Just wanted to ask others if they lost all desire for seks after their op? I am now five months post-op and have realised I have never wanted it once since the op. This is unusual for me...

2 likes, 40 replies

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  • sarah1996
    sarah1996 belleAUSSydney

    Posted

    I lost mine before op due to the severe amount of pain and considering i had no movement in my left leg it made some positions impossible. Which meant i could never look my fiance in the face during. How depressing. Nearly 3 weeks post op and obvs still not wanting but couldnt even if i wanted to 😂
  • bini31328
    bini31328 belleAUSSydney

    Posted

    Hi - yes I went off the whole idea for a while as just physically too uncomfortable - back to normal after a few months - prob did it out of obligation at first TBH - but happy now 😀Was same with last 2 ops plus after childbirth - it's all a bit of an assault on the body ( the ops etc !) and takes a while to feel normal xxxxx
  • linda38528
    linda38528 belleAUSSydney

    Posted

    Good question Belle!

    Likes Sarah and others, ... this was not a burning preoccupation for quite a while before the operation and since.

    TBH, it took some courage the first time (on the part of both of us). I think it would be fair to say that we are still engaged in a gentler, cautious exploration of this element of our relationship and may well be for a while yet with my 2nd THR scheduled this summer.

    😕😉😚

  • annie.conway
    annie.conway belleAUSSydney

    Posted

    Yep, 7-8 weeks for me and absolutely no interest, much to my husband's unhappiness ....
    • Rocketman_SG6UK
      Rocketman_SG6UK annie.conway

      Posted

      Yes, it happens to us guys too - after my 6 week relaxation of the rules regarding turning on my side, my wife was pressing me for some loving ... and it took me a while to get into that loving place again.

      Take your time, enjoy each other without full relations, and progress as you feel able, try different positions, have a laugh together at your attempts.  

      You could always get him to rub Bio Oil into your scar - make it a fun time ?

      Graham - 🚀💃

  • toto64676
    toto64676 belleAUSSydney

    Posted

    HI

    The pain before the op, the recovery time and the menopause all combined to make it less of a priority.  We are much more careful now as I am still nervous of how much movement I have in the new joint.  Hopefully we will get back to some semblance of normality but it is slow going at 4 months post op.

  • bini31328
    bini31328 belleAUSSydney

    Posted

    Dont know about anyone else but , given the excess weight from inactivity, the fading bruises across my belly from the tinzapain  injections , the appearance of cellulite i never had before , the pills on my bedside chest, the leg swelling that means i have grooves when i take my socks  off, the being reminded to take my walking stick with me , the being tired and going to bed at 9 30pm ........i am definitely not feeling my most alluring ! I know the other two post op times everything worked out fine eventually and we got back to normal so i,m remaining optimistic ! Xxxxx
    • sarah1996
      sarah1996 bini31328

      Posted

      I know the feeling. Being 20, taking so many medications before op, having to use a crutch, 3cm shoe raiser in my shoe (which was even thr correct size as they couldnt make one to fit inside my shoe) covered in stretch marks because of having to gain weight because of weight issues, but actually managing to lose weight over this whole ordeal is a plus rather than gaining it due to being unable to exercise, but now being added with a new huge scar to match the others, covered in bruises and pin pricks from those stupid injections and now being concerned that the surgery has made the operated leg worse than it was before hand. I feel awful, no point wearing anything nice because i cant, my hair is a mess because i cant wash it easily. I feel like a wreck atm. And im concerned this whole thing was for nothing.

      God dont i sound happy haha xxxx

    • bini31328
      bini31328 sarah1996

      Posted

      Ahh, its early days yet for you honey , and you will get back to normal - just going to take time . Can you treat yourself to the hairdressers ? When i couldnt wash mine in the first few weeks i went to the chap across the road and he washed it for me , just asking me to put a donation in his charity tin - i blow dried it at home . And wear your nice clothes because they,ll make you feel better . Get a pedicure ( or one from a friend if cant afford) - all those 'trivial ' girly things make us feel better about ourselves , and you,ve lost weight which is great . Although must say i agree with you about those injections ! Chin up lovely Sarah - you will be fine , am sure the surgery will work in the long run . Big hug xxxxx
    • sarah1996
      sarah1996 bini31328

      Posted

      I was thinking about going to the hairdresses but i was concerned id get there and the chairs wouldnt be suitable. Also i cant even walk to the end of the street yet never mind the hairdresses even though if i was back to normal they are literally only a 3 minute walk away. I have a district nurse coming out on monday to ivaluate me for a wheelchair because college wont let me come back unless in a wheelchair and atleast if i had one i could go out. As for a friend giving me a pamper session, my only friend lives in a different country so thats not gonna happen haha

      The only clothes i look good in are jeans and im to scared to try jeans as my incision isnt healed yet haha. But i am going to get my first shower on monday hopefully in 3 weeks. Lucky me haha xxx

    • bini31328
      bini31328 sarah1996

      Posted

      I dont believe the only clothes you look good in are jeans ! But leggings and a nice loose top? A wheelchair will help and you,ll feel a lot better once youre able to get out and about a bit hon . My hairdressers chair was fine , they have nice recliner ones so your feet can go up and i had a pedicure but on the couch as i couldnt sit with my foot in her lap ! Im lucky as both those are about 20 foot from my front door. You will feel amazingly better after your shower - i couldnt for 41/2 weeks as my wound was leaking - my first shower felt like a birthday present 😀😀xxx
    • sarah1996
      sarah1996 bini31328

      Posted

      Hahaha they really are. And i bought my very first pair of leggings on Monday 😂 i actually do like them though. And yup the wheelchair will allow my Mr to take me out so I hope my mam can either bring me one from work or the district nurse gets her arse into gear and actually say i need one haha. Plus if i get one i can go to the salon and pamper myself a bit. And 20ft? Im pretty sure that chair wouldnt get through the door never mind you being able to sit on it 😂😂 and yes im so excited for my shower but it will be my first and last for a while as i only have a bath and theres no way i could get in, and OTs couldnt fit a bath board. And theres no way im travelling 36 miles everytime i want a shower 😂😂xxx
    • Soos2016
      Soos2016 sarah1996

      Posted

      Well, you definitely need a wheelchair, Sarah  - for the exams, hairdresser and mobility!
    • sarah1996
      sarah1996 Soos2016

      Posted

      I know. Its scary how little i can walk at the moment. It worries me
    • lors23
      lors23 sarah1996

      Posted

      Sarah l am honerered l wish l could come and do your hair for you l would in a second l still remember the basics from hairdressing college. But hun l still think you look pretty regardless of what you think of feel you will always look pretty my little peanut. Its just how this op makes us feel as l am the same xx
    • sarah1996
      sarah1996 lors23

      Posted

      Haha i know hun. Im just feeling crappy atm. Ill cope. And as soon as i get ny hands on a wheelchair i can start going out and that will cheer me right up xxx
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