15 mg to. 10 mg, dose change...........side effect?

sorry but its not mild at all! its taken me 2 years to reduce by 4mgs and its been hell!!!

hi toria

thanks for reply

i was going great, had a few really good nights out, felt like my old self again then last night just crashed!!!

really dissapointed, i thought i was coming out the other end!

hope your good anyhow

rob

when i reduce its usually between 8-12 weeks before i feel withdrawals but you might not get any, try to stay away from drinking its not great when withdrawing.

how long do you feel withdrawl toria?

i was sooo hoping this was behind me!

i ve got some partys coming up & apprehensive at present, i wanna go but dont wanna go!....does that make sense?

its a case of how long is a piece of string everybody is different!

hi kate

thanks for reply

geeeez its so frustrating, its the day before christmas eve & i feel absoultly dreadful, ive just got in from work and working tomortow with what i describe as flu like symptons, tired & spaced out feeling & not really connected, loss of appettite.....is this normal?.......i just keep my head down & plough through!

thanks rob

It is very frutrating - no other medicine for other ailments seems to give people as much grief as these do. That's why many people get it so wrong ........

When you have anxiety its your body that is extremely sensitised, meaning your nervous system is on high alert. It notices every thought and feeling to an extreme, finding it hard to focus on anything else but how we think and feel.

Because your nervous system is behaving like this it will also feel every stress, upset, overwork, and probably too much alcohol too. Its very sensitive and will overreact.

The medicine calms your nervous system and with it those feelings and thoughts ease off too. A change of attitude towards these thoughts / feelings as well as relaxation also reverses this sensitiation.

Having alcohol could have possibly made that days dose not work, so it could be a mix of missing that dose, the effects of alcohol and your nervous system taking a bashing that’s caused all this. Your nervous system is tired, hence why you feel physically tired (your body behaves the same when recovering from any illness, even flu). Feeling spaced out is just those you being focused on how you feel at the moment.

Yes its normal to feel like this - its temporary and will pass. Take it easy for a few days, and try and go about your day with a relaxed attitude - it really will help. Your nervous system needs to heal.

thank you so much for reply kate, i think with this medication its the reassurance that you need in all likewise situations, just to say its normal & your not 'losing it'.

what you ve just written makes perfect sense & feel better for reading it.

i just plough through at work & get on with it & likewise with my family.......but yeh its not easy.......

but you ve put my mind at ease as always kate thank you

That’s the nature of a sensitised nervous system - it makes you doubt everything, and yes I remember needing constant reassurance too. You can’t see or feel the truth about anything to do with anxiety, because fear overrides everything (can’t see the wood for the trees).

But yes, carry on with your day but do try letting go of tension inside - slow things down. Also let those negative thoughts come and don’t follow them through. Again you won’t feel any benefit from doing any of this (anxiety masks it) but in time it will bring about a calmer nervous system, and when that happens those thoughts and feelings will subside too.

No not easy at all - hardest thing I ever dealt with - but it absolutely works.

hi kate

talk about timing......trust me to crash & its christmas, i m suppose to be going to a party tonight on my street but you know when you just really really carnt be bothered at all!!!!!!

i work hard & get stuck in but this feeling is really quite awful!

thanks again for reply kate

youve put my mind at ease

rob

Hi Rob

Sorry, just seen this. Wondering if you went to the party. Just listen to your body - if you’re tired then rest at home, but don’t stay home just to avoid having any anxiety feelings when at a party. If it’s anxiety, then go to the party, relax, you could mention to a few people you’re feeling a little out of sorts so if you’re quiet they’ll understand (they don’t need to know exactly what’s wrong), have a little food / drink, have a little chatter ..... stay for a little while then take your leave. Even if you feel anxious, try and stay the hour, relax into it.

If however you stayed home then don’t feel guilty. There’s always another party. If you were suffering a massive hangover you’d want to stay home.

Whatever you decided to do, I hope your evening has gone well. Try not to worry about how you feel - it will pass.

hi kate

i got home from work & i felt lousy but i got cleaned up & went to the party for 2-3 hours and enjoyed myself, it was all the neighbours so plenty of friendly faces and with it being christmas eve it wasnt going to be a late or mad one so im glad i pushed myself. Its funny kate you almost have to go against what your brain is telling you! its like the fear before the event is never as bad as the event itself! But i went anyhow & glad i did.

As you say i must stop worrying how i feel all the time

thanks again for your reply kate , they very much put my mind at ease.

rob

Yay!!! Glad you went to the party, and yes, anticipatory anxiety is always the worst - you talk yourself into thinking you won’t cope, it’ll be bad, you’ll panic etc etc before you even get there, when the actual situation isn’t bad at all.

You did exactly the right thing - going forward INTO panic instead of running from it. That is the way forward. But you do need to go forward with relaxation, as tensing against it is also fighting.

You’re 100% right - you do actually have to do the complete opposite to what you think (though you can recover on meds without having to do any of this), but my god it helps so much it you understand anxiety and move into it rather than run.

It’s your sensitised nervous system that gives you anxiety, makes you focus totally on yourself and to constantly think inwardly - we become afraid of how we feel. It’s just a feeling.

We don’t need to fix ourselves, as our body will fix itself if we just allow it to. But instead we automatically start searching for a cure, an answer, a way to rid ourselves of this ‘thing’, we constantly go over and over things, analyse each feeling and thought, shrink from our thoughts, tense ourselves up, we hide by staying away from places we think we fear ..... all of these things keep us ill, as they produce anxiety which continually feeds the anxiety, but if we did the opposite then your nervous system will fix itself, it will calm down because you’re taking away the fuel that feeds that fire. As the nervous system calms down then so too will the thoughts and all those other feelings, aches and pains.

Problem is anxiety foxes you - it makes you believe you won’t recover, and even when you are recovering you don’t feel anything or see any results for a long time, so easily get disheartened and give up, slipping back to fighting it again. I did that for 16 years which got me nowhere. Changing the approach is key.

The cure lies within each of us. It comes from the inside - the real cure. Yes you can recover on meds alone (I did the first time), but having the knowledge of how anxiety works and how to help yourself is one of the most amazing things I learnt. This is why I’m able to be meds free - I have no more fear of ‘it’ anymore.

amazing advice katecogs - you said exactly this, to me, and it worked. takè the feelings with you but don't react to them. it is very hard but do-able.....relaxing (when feeling so anxious) is the hardest part and trying to switch your negative thoughts off, whilst attempting conversation, is even harder.

Christmas creates an even heavier pressure as everyone seems so joyful, too.

Thanks Kate,

Im having a super hard time this week with all the pressure of Christmas expectations. Ive been doing well but feel like ive taken 10 steps back. its scary and just makes me want to sleep but i have so many commitments i need to be at, which fuel the fire. your words are comforting.

Christmas, holidays etc are stressful for anyone, and will be felt more so by those already suffering from anxiety. Your nervous is already tired so adding more stress then it will be affected even more, making you feel all those familiar feelings.

Yes those feelings are scary, but try not to dread or fear them. As Rob said, he found you have to do the opposite to you’d think. Know you will feel these feelings at the moment, it’s your overworked and tired nervous system creating them, let those feelings be there, don’t analyse them (there’s no use anyway because you know they’re there because of your nervous system), relax towards to them, carry on. Know that when you give into the feelings, let them be, don’t keep ‘head chatting’ about them, they will go, not today or tomorrow, but they will go. They can’t get any worse .....

We keep ourselves constantly ill by fearing it all, and whilst you can’t just stop the fear if will go if you start to relax towards it all yet still carry out the commitments - slump, let go of tension, take the feelings with you, and do what you have to do,

However hard it feels, just relax and let it be.

i also follow kates advise and it most certainly works.

Yes it is very hard - recovery isn’t easy at all but it’s absolutely achievable.

Yes it’s probably the hardest thing to not engage with the thoughts. But don’t try stopping them, be aware of them in your head, just don’t chat with them. That’s another part of recovery, along with relaxing.

I fought this for 16 years, and though I understood this method from books, I couldn’t quite grasp it, and of course eventually recovered on meds. Understanding helped so much though. But I’ve taken the meds twice and the second time I withdrew I put this method into practice and it really works. I’d never have believed it, especially when I was ill, because you can’t see past the anxiety, can’t see the truth, can’t believe relaxing and not engaging would have an effect. This actually does stop feeding the fire.

Instead of fearing the return of anxiety, welcome it, because you can’t practice without it present (you can’t learn to ride a bike without having a bicycle to sit on).

hi kate

its nice to know im doing the right thing!

as you say its defo hard going against your own thoughts & feelings but you KNOW your being fed a lie!!!

thank you for reassurance & kind words, at this stage where i am means alot.

talking about this & sharing stories is sooo helpful

rob

It is strange when you recover, because you don't feel you're ever doing the right thing, even when taking medicine, and that little voice will always want to question it all (or at least tell you you're not doing it right). Always that 'doubting Thomas'.

But yes, if you know the truth behind anxiety, understand it, know how it works, then even when anxiety lies you should know the truth and cling to that. You never 'feel' the truth (because we're often devoid of all feelings and emotions) but as long as you know the truth you sort of recover 'blind' (ie you do what you've learnt without seeing any results, no questioning anything, on and on ....... and the results will eventually appear).

Yes its definitely weird going against your thoughts / feelings - but its human nature to do the other because it feels right (though its not).

Anxiety is certainly a strange condition - yet everyone can recover from it. The right meds, dose, understanding, mindset, the right path ....... and time, lots of time.