17 year old having INSTRUSIVE suicidal thoughts

Posted , 4 users are following.

 hi everyone! I am 17 years old and I have severe anxiety. I’ve had it for eight months now and Ive on medication for it. I’m on Zoloft and I went from 50 mg and bumped down to 25 mg because I wanted to ween off of it because I was doing so good with my anxiety I thought I grown out of it. I was only on the 25 mg for 5 days then I completely went off of it without my doctors notice. I was fine for 3 weeks and then during school a bad panic attack hit me and I had to leave early. After that I began to have some negative thoughts abd for some reason I am having suicidal OCD thoughts and they are very overwhelming. I DO NOT want to hurt myself in anyway and I have no desire in committing such an act but for some reason I have thoughts like” I want to die” “I don’t  wanna be here” and I have very disturbing images of me harming myself. I HAVE NEVER THOUGHT OF SUICIDE OR HARMING MYSELF BEFORE I HAD SEVERE ANXIETY and I would never want to do such a thing!!! I believe it is just a fear that was triggered somehow but my head is making it seem like I want to do it, can anyone please help??? 

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7 Replies

  • Posted

    Best thing to do is get into counseling right away. You are doing the right thing by expressing how you feel so others can help you. My nephew killed himself last July, and didnt express himself or reach out. Im Praying for you to keep your honesty how you really feel and let the drs help you. My son is 23 and struggles with severe panic attacks so i truly understand.
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  • Posted

    Hi.  When you were feeling better that was the tablets doing it’s work.  I’m no doctor but have been on the same tablet for some time now and it’s at a steady level in my system to keep me feeling good but you just can’t stop them straight off, hence your return to anxiety. Please go back to your Doctor and tell him/her exactly what you have put here, it’s an important step.  Hang in there girl, when I’m feeling really low I just say to myself “there are so many people in the Hospice that would swap with me in the blink of an eye” and I’m grateful for my crappy days as I know the good ones are there also.  Well done you for coming on here, there are so many helpful people that have pulled me through.  Now make that appointment and keep,us posted on how you go... x
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    • Posted

      Hello! Thank you so much for the reply. I forgot to add that I spoke to my doctor about how I got off my med quickly 2 weeks ago and she was surprised I would do such a thing and told me to go back on 25 ASAP. I did that for a week and I finally bumped up to 50 yesterday. Like I said I know for a fact I would never harm myself but it scares me that these thoughts will cross through my mind. Will they go away? 
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    • Posted

      Also,  I never keep my feelings in and I tell people about the thoughts that go through my head especially my mother and she has been there through it all. 
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  • Posted

    Hi this is what can happen when you suddenly stop your meds.  This is never a good idea as you are now getting withdrawal symptoms.  You should never go off your meds on your own and should always do it under a doctor guidance.

    Also you need to  have been feeling better for at least 6 months before you even think about stopping your meds otherwise your symptoms can return.  You need to go and see your doctor and get some help.  

    Chin up it will be fine.  x

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    • Posted

      Hello,

      I spoke to my doctor and she told me to go back on 25 mg for a week and then bump back up to 50 so that is currently what I’m doing, will these thoughts go away? They’re very scary...

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  • Posted

    Hi it will take a while for the med to get back into your system again so hold on and you will feel better in time.  x
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