2 months now

Posted , 3 users are following.

months ago I came to this website looking for something, anything that would keep me going...

I was in a very dark place for a few weeks after finding out  I just felt so hopeless. i just kkept thinking, I'm 19 years old and my life is over. I was embarrassed and disgusted with myself, I was completely repulsed by my being. I couldn't look at myself in the mirror for a while and I couldn't make it 2 hours without breaking down into sobs. I didn't know what to do, or think or feel. And that was the thing, I didn't want to think anymore. I didn't want to feel the emotions I was feeling. I was done with life.

 then i was recommended to go to this website and everything changed. I can honestly say this forum and all of the kind people willing to share their stories saved my life. Here i learned that it's not really that terrible of a thing to have because so many people have it and it doesn't kill you or anything. It could be so much worse. Before this site I ddidn't have the facts,  I only knew what I learned from society and that was very ignorant of me. The stigma is the worst thing about having herpes in my opinion.

I've lost almost 10 lbs since learning I have herpes. I've been walking a bit and just eating a lot better Iin general. I feel better about myself healthwise. I'mnot Iin any way obese but my diet consisted of McDonald's and any other fast food place you can think of.

i also have a lot more respect for myself. I realized that I'm not a bad person or a nasty person for having this,  it isn'tmy ffault the person didn't tell me. It's been two of the hardest months of my life but I am ddefinitely a better person from all of this. I wanted to post this jus to show people tthat it DOES get better. I still get sad and I still have my moments but it's not as bad. I have hope. I feel alive. I'm happy again. 

1 like, 4 replies

4 Replies

  • Posted

    Very cool story Bri. Thank you for sharing with us all. smile 
  • Posted

    Hi Brio,

    It's very inspiring to read your story and to know that you have come to terms with having herpes. We are get through the different phases, the shock, everything crumbling, the awareness, the acceptance, living a more healthy and responsible life then just finding out it isn't such a fuss.

    I'm really happy you have been very strong and courageous about it and at your age it's even more applaudable smile

    Just keep it up and things will get even better smile

    • Posted

      Thank you. Though I wouldn't really say I've completely come to terms with it, i still have plenty of moments, but it has gotten a lot easier to think about. I just want people to know that it sucks, especially at first, but with time you kind of just forget that it was such a burden. I was so depressed for a while but II'm too young to worry like that. I want t still live my life and love the life I live. I don't want something that 1 in 4 (or what ever the percentage is now ) people have. It's so common and it'sreally nnothing.  
    • Posted

      Yes it sucks but nothing to waste time on.

      Kudos to you, do exactly that, live your life smile

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