20mg to 40mg - Really struggling and looking for support.

Posted , 10 users are following.

Hi all, I'm new to this forum but it seems like a good place to come for support. Last year I was diagnosed with Cyclothymia which is a mild form of bipolar. I was given mood stabilizers along with my Citalopram 20mg. They didn't seem to help my depression and my anxiety got worse so was taken off mood stabilizers and my Citalopram was upped to 40mg then I was put on 15mg of Mirtazapine. This helped alleviate the depression but then I got hypomania so I reduced the Citalopram back to 20mg. I steadily got more depressed and anxious and the psychiatrist suggested a different mood stabilizer which again didn't help my depression and anxiety. At my request, I'm now back on 40mg Citalopram. Been taking it for 13 days and I'm not feeling any better. I'm getting myself really anxious and panicking that this time I'm never going to get well again. I've been given diazepam to take when I'm really bad. Being on my own during the day doesn't help. I just want to he well again and I feel like it's never going to happen. I'm struggling so much. Thanks for reading.

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  • Edited

    Hello Jones,

    your story really touched me because before I started citalopram, although for anxiety though, I was feeling confused and inward and constantly needing support. Since you increased your dose.. unfortunately your body will need some time to adjust to this dose increase and that can lead to feeling symptoms all over again or feeling like you're back to square 1. Patience, prayer and perseverance is key at this point (if you're religious) You can also keep busy with books. Kate Cogs on this forum reccommended me 'At last a life' by Paul David and also 'Hope and help for your nerves' by Claire Weekes. These books will help you understand and give you the much needed knowledge you need to get through this difficult period. Be patient with yourself and try to sleep well and dont run from negative thoughts.. it is pretty scary and heartbreaking i totally understand but you need to understand anxiety is the main reason you are feeling this way to begin with and your recovery will eventually come to you. You can pm me if you need more words of encouragement daily x

    • Posted

      Hi Sharon, thanks for your reply. You're right, it's frightening feeling like this and I get so upset every day. I'm trying to accept that it's my anxiety telling me I won't get better but it's so hard. I'll look into those books you recommended.

  • Edited

    Give it at least 12 weeks I know it is so very hard but you will get there

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