23 year old male memory loss for years

Posted , 5 users are following.

When I was 8yr old I had a big rock dropped on my head in school. I don't remember anything prior to that or the event's of that day. I have had other hits on the head including a biking accident 7yrs ago, flying over the handlebars with no helmet, had swelling on the right side of my face but that's all (didn't get checked out).

I constantly keep forgetting things, a lot of things and it's putting a huge strain on many things such a my relationship with my girlfriend.

I don't know whether or not it's the knocks tot he head that stop me remembering my childhood (primary and most of secondary school) but I don't. I remember tiny little things and to be honest, I think the only things i think I remember are actually just bits of information I've been told by others.

Often I can't even remember things that I've done yesterday or sometimes not remembering what I've done the same day.

I don't know if this could effect memory loss but recenly one of my friends committed suicide and we were quite close. He was asking me for help and he did on the night he committed suicide but I didn't know how to help and I feel somewhat to blame. That, plus other things, added lots of stress on my shoulders and I tried to deal with it all myslef and it did lead to depression

I'm just worried about the memory loss. It seems quite significant and I'm gettign headaches a lot and mild pain behind my eyes and quite often am feeling unbalanced, though my balance is recorded as very good. 

Not sure what I should do, or if I should do anything?

0 likes, 6 replies

Report / Delete

6 Replies

  • Posted

    Hi Danny,

    You're obviously under a lot of stress, having lost your friend to suicide. That would be enough to derail anyone. But you're certainly not to blame. I volunteer on a suicide help line, and I know that once someone has really made up their mind to go through with it there's nothing anyone can do or say to change their mind.

    It sounds as if that childhood accident left you with retrograde amnesia (loss of memory for events before the accident). This is very common after a severe knock on the head, especially if you were knocked unconscious. Anterograde amnesia - where you have difficulty remembering events after the accident - is less common but can also happen. However, anxiety and/or depression is another very common cause of short-term memory loss, and you've clearly taken a major emotional knock after the death of your friend.

    I think the best thing you can do right now is go and see a doctor about your symptoms. There could be a residual brain injury following on from your various accidents, and this ought to be checked out.

    But above all, don't beat yourself up over the death of your friend. It's good to mourn him, but there's nothing you could have done to stop him taking his life.

    Report / Delete Reply
    • Posted

      I think it's great that you volunteer with a suicide helpline, I know that can be particularly hard at times too. My girlfriend was suicidal after her mom died. I talked her out of 6 suicide attempts and then we broke up and at the beginning of that, she tried suicide again but there was noone there to stop her. So she was in a bad state, rushed to hospital where she stayed unconcious for 3 days. She pulled through and is now doing much better, getting her life on track. She's adamant that she's going to comitt suicide and she would've done at least a year ago if it wasn't for me. 

      So trust me, talking to people who feel like comitting suicide, helps more than you know. 

      I've had quite a lot of emotional knocks and it has played with my head quite a lot, but also, the memory loss started before all of that too. I can remember a few little bits from my past but definitely nothing before the rock to my head. 

      For example, me thinking about Saturday, I can't remember what things I did or anything I ate.

      I feel there might, at a slim chance, be some kind of brain injury from past accidents but I know I'd feel like like it's stupid and/or wasting the Dr's time because if it was serious then over the years it would've got really bad

      Report / Delete Reply
    • Posted

      Hi Danny,

      Not necessarily. It's only brain tumours that kill within months or weeks if they go untreated. (I'm a former neuro nurse, btw.) It's possible that you could have been left with some other kind of lesion - e.g. calcifications, but there are other possibilities - which could cause trouble without necessarily getting worse over time. You certainly wouldn't be seen as stupid or a time-waster if you consulted a doctor over this problem.

      The other possibility is that you're simply someone who doesn't have a good memory. We're all different. I've always had a weird memory myself. I remember all kinds of minute details. For example, I can still remember chewing the wooden bars of my cot and exactly what the varnish tasted like, yet my mother told me they transferred me to a proper bed when I was only two! But I've always been absent-minded about important stuff, like appointments, people's birthdays, what I'm supposed to be doing at any one time. And I couldn't tell you what I had to eat on Saturday either. I also regularly forget PIN codes and how to use household appliances, and always have, even when I was young.

      There are all kinds of other possibilities that might be making your memory even worse at the moment. For example, at 23 you're still in the age range for infectious mononucleosis (glandular fever or the kissing disease, depending which country you live in). Ditto other low-level viral infections that can cause general fatigue and low mood without making you seriously ill. You really do need to discuss all this with a doctor. But try to avoid taking antidepressants or anti-anxiety meds - especially benzos - as these have a bad effect on memory.

      Report / Delete Reply
  • Posted

    Hi Danny,  My spouse was hit in the head by a cinder block at work about 10 years ago.  He, however, remembers everything from before the accident.  His short term memory is what has been affected.  I could have told him something yesterday and he would've forgotten it when he woke up in the morning.  It happens more times than not but on occasion he does remember some things.

    He refuses to see a doctor and get an MRI.  This brain injury does put stress on not only him, but myself as well as family.  But we remind ourselves that it is not his fault.  Though I get mad that he forgets important things, I know he can't help it.  It is stressful to be repetitive. 

    Your girl friends as well as others around you need to be supportive.  It is not your fault you experience memory loss.  Don't be as stubborn as my other half.  Go see a doctor and get an MRI.  Find out what is wrong.

    Report / Delete Reply

Join this discussion or start a new one?

New discussion Reply

Report or request deletion

Thanks for your help!

We want the forums to be a useful resource for our users but it is important to remember that the forums are not moderated or reviewed by doctors and so you should not rely on opinions or advice given by other users in respect of any healthcare matters. Always speak to your doctor before acting and in cases of emergency seek appropriate medical assistance immediately. Use of the forums is subject to our Terms of Use and Privacy Policy and steps will be taken to remove posts identified as being in breach of those terms.

newnav-down newnav-up