Posted , 7 users are following.
At the beginning of April I had a rough life event (my husband cheated on me while being drunk) and since then I am struggling with myself. First I couldn't eat, I couldn't sleep, we had loong talks about what happened and us and so on...Unfortunately the derealization came along so I resorted to professional help. I got Cital and today is day 20. Gosh, I had all the side effects - starting with heightened anxiety, nausea, foggy mind, dizziness and now - I have totally stuck throat:( I mean when I talk I have like a blocade, like I am trying to sound naturally but it sounds tensed. I feel strange even talking to my work colleagues with whom I had always great laughs. Today I also got negative thoughts about myself (which I never have!) and I don't know if it is due to the citalopram or the self-confidence drop I could get from the situation...
I don't know if I should stop the drug (not cold turkey but gradually) or let it work...But how long? When do I take decision enough is enough?
I am starting to think maybe I should drop Cital and try natural things - sports, meditation, counseling (I am doing it anyway already), 5-HTP...As my depression (?) is due to some event - maybe I should rather try to overcome it by myself, live through that, let emotions flow...? What I am worried about is that the pill will only mask the problem and delete emotions I have to express sooner or later...On the other hand - I feel really low now, with the throat blocade I feel more and more lonely as contact with other people is not fun anymore and I have to function somehow...I work, have 2 children...I want to be happy again.
I wish that inner tension would leave me...I will embrace all the emotions, even hard ones - but I have to feel myself to do that. Right now i DO NOT feel myself and it hurts so much.
Did you have similar experience with Cital? Will it take the tension away?
0 likes, 17 replies