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For the past 30 years my life has been totally destroyed by what has been diagnosed as an Anxiety disorder combined with depression. The symptom of this anxiety is to want to pee all the time and my life revolves around going to the toilet. As a result I've been stuck in a job I absolutely hate as I can't attend meetings, training etc and so can't progress or change job. Relationships have never lasted and I don't have much in the way of friends or social life as a result. The only times I go out anywhere with other people are the occasional visit to pubs in evenings as I know there are toilets available all the time. I can't remember the last time I went anywhere with someone during the day. I have missed out on so much as a result of this illness and become very lonely and depressed.
It all started when I was 18 and at college. I was very intelligent and thought I had a great future ahead of me but 6 months before A levels this started and that basically was the end of any sort of career/decent life.
In the beginning I had all the tests for physical causes but nothing was found and I know in myself that the problem is in my head. With the exception of feeling edgy most of the time this is my only real symptom of anxiety, but it is a life destroying one. It's only really in the last 8 years that anything has been done to try and sort this problem as help doesn't seem to have been available during the majority of my illness. I was on Clomipramine for 7 years which did help and I would say I was 70% well but they had so many life effecting side effects, I was like a zombie and also had zero sex drive which contributed to the demise of my marriage which lasted all of 4 years. I have recently come off Clomipramine because of this but obviously the peeing problem is still there. I have tried CBT recently but after 30 years the problem is so much part of me that this has proved unsuccessful.
With no hope of a relationship ever lasting, a low paid unfulfilling job I hate, very little social life and fear of going almost anywhere the depression is getting worse and I'm desperate to find an answer to this problem. I really cannot remember ever being happy and I simply cannot carry on like this.
Does or has anyone else suffered from this either short term or for as long as I have and does anyone know of a drug or any other treatment that works for this type of anxiety? Thanks
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