66 Peri menopause / Menopause Symptoms you may experience which may help some ladies
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SIXTY-SIX PHYSICAL SYMPTOMS: Part one 1 - 49
These are very real physical changes and conditions. Some symptoms alarm a woman that she may be suffering from a serious disease. Perhaps you know the more common ones related to menopausal symptoms in this list. But many of these may surprise you, as they have not been typically associated with this normal physiological transformation.
1. Change in Menstrual Cycle, Cycles may get closer together or farther apart, lighter and shorter in duration or much heavier, lasting longer than one has been accustomed to. Menses may seem to take forever to begin with dark spotting for days until you actually flow, or you might feel like you have your menses every two weeks.
2. Menstrual Flooding can come on with sudden onset and feel like you may hemorrhage to death. Or it can be a gradual build up just when you think your menses will end and you start gushing for days. Flooding commonly accompanies the woman with uterine fibroids as she transits into menopause.
3. Headaches, Migraines, especially before, during or at the end of your menses debilitate and radically interferes with normal functioning.
4. Decreased Motor Coordination, Clumsiness, almost begins to make the woman who experiences this feel like she is certainly less than graceful during perhaps an already awkward period in her life.
5. Lethargy, a persistent feeling sluggishness physically and mentally, that seems to negate ones ability to do much.
6. Physical Exhaustion , and Crushing Crashing Fatigue that can come on so suddenly and grip you into feeling like you will collapse unless you stop this instant.
7. Exacerbation of any Chronic Illness or Existing Condition transpires as hormones decline or deviate from their normal balance.
8. Insomnia, this includes a new or unusual pattern of either difficulty falling asleep, or dropping off to sleep for a few hours and then awakening with the inability to return to sleep.
9. Sleep Disturbances sometimes are from nightmares, night sweats, or just a vague sense of restlessness keeping you up or disrupting your precious revitalizing retreat from this realm of responsibilities.
10. Night Sweats often begin between a woman?s breasts, initially a night or two before her menses, waking her from sleep, later more profoundly disturbing with up to total body saturation, followed by damp or sweat drenched chills.
11. Interference With Dream Recall interrupts the sense of normal sleep, if you are someone accustomed to vivid or at least some detailed memory of your dreamtime.
12. Muscle Cramps can occur anywhere in the body from legs to back to neck, and sometimes reflects the need for more calcium, or simply that your progesterone levels are too low.
13. Low Backache often worsens before or during menses, but if your hormones remain at low levels, you can experience it on a regular basis.
14. Gall Bladder Symptoms of pain, spasms and discomfort felt in the right upper abdominal quadrant under the ribs, which may be accompanied by belching, bloating, and intolerance to certain foods reflect the increased liver load with declining hormones.
15. Frequent Urination, or sensations that mimic urinary infections is a disturbing symptom often unrelieved by actual urination. It is often experienced as the sensation of needing to urinate all the time, even immediately afterwards.
16. Urinary Incontinence, the uncontrollable and spontaneous loss of urine, or the Urge for Incontinence, can occur suddenly or feel continuous, and not only in response to coughing, sneezing, jumping or running.
17. Hypoglycemic Reactions happen when suddenly your blood sugar crashes and you must have food now.
18. Food Cravings, often for sweets or salty foods, but can include sour or pungent foods.
19. Increased Appetite, especially at night and after dinner contributes to that unusual and unwanted weight gain.
20. Dark Circles Under Eyes can also be caused by adrenal exhaustion and thyroid dysfunctions, but no amount of sleep seems to eliminate it.
21. Joint and Muscle Pain, Achy, Sore Joints, Muscles and Tendons, which sometimes develop into actual carpal tunnel syndrome, or give rise to the questioning of other disease possibilities.
22. Increased Tension in Muscles demonstrates itself in those hunched up shoulders as you work or talk about anything uncomfortable, along with promoting lower back pain and a stiff neck.
23. Increased Hair Loss or Thinning anywhere on body, including your head, armpits, pubic area.
24. Increase in Facial Hair especially under your chin, or along your jaw line. It may be defined by generalized hair growth, or a specific and coarse single strand of hair that pokes out, even curls.
25. Unusually Hair Growth, around Nipples, between Breasts, down your back, places where your hair was finer, less coarse.
26. Acne, quite disturbing to any woman who dealt with this in adolescence and never thought it would recur.
27. Infertility causes grief in the woman who postponed pregnancy in her earlier years and now wishes to conceive, carry to term a healthy baby, and discovers she is unable to do so.
28. Loss of Breast Tissue begins with the decrease of progesterone production. Women often feel as though their breast have become empty sacs devoid of their normal fullness, with or without sagging.
29. Breast Soreness/Tenderness/Pain/ Engorgement and swelling, occurs particularly a few days to one week before bleeding actually begins, which usually potentiates complete relief of any pain or swelling.
30. Painful, or tender nipples have been described as this exquisite localized pain only in the nipples and suggests estrogen excess.
31. Cold Extremities feels quite strange especially in the presence of a hot flash, the combination of which is not impossible.
32. Being Accident Prone, bumping into things, not even realizing it until the bruise reveals itself later and then lacking the ability to recall the causative incident feels perplexing and a little scary at the prospect of something more damaging.
33. Hot flashes initially may be described as mild to severe flushes of heat waves, and for some women these evolve into intense outbreaks of sudden heat with sweating and turning bright red all over.
34. Loss of Sexual Energy, our Libido, can be marked by a gradual or sudden disinterest in sex, to the development of an actual aversion.
35. Painful Sex often described as if one?s vagina would tear open at the point of penetration along with feelings of abrasion during intercourse.
36. Vaginal Dryness, Irritation, sometimes accompanied by a consistent unusual discharge - typically odor free, negates a woman?s ability to be sexually active, or able to enjoy or be comfortable in her body.
37. Dizziness, feeling lightheaded and the loss of physical balance, and even a bit wobbling at times, requires pause in movement to prevent falling over or deepening into vertigo or feeling faint.
38. Ringing in the Ears, Tinnitus, can be experienced as a pulsing sensation, a whooshing sound, an almost musical or buzzing sound with a fuzzy sensation.
39. Abdominal Bloating comes on suddenly often after eating, or seems to be all the time, and can be visibly evident making you feel that you look like you are pregnant.
40. Weight Gain disturbs most women, particularly when it seems to happen over a couple of days, settles in the waist, buttocks and thighs, promoting a visceral thickening from the waist down, the classic middle-aged figure.
41. Fluid Retention, Edema, commonly with swelling in the legs and ankles, though not limited to this area and it is unrelieved by urination.
42. Palpitations or Heart Racing usually comes on suddenly, without warning or provocation, and dissipates spontaneously. The experience can be so wild and intense that a woman may become alarmed and wonder if she is having a heart attack.
43. Irregularities in your Heart Rate may feel more like your heart has just done a flip-flop or skipped a beat.
44. Constipation/Diarrhea, intermittent or alternating, results from declining hormone levels, which increase the demands on liver function and alters intestinal motility.
45. Tendency towards Candidiasis can increase, even if you have no prior known history ? and if you do, it may worsen.
46. Gastrointestinal Distress, Increased Flatulence, Unrelieved Gas pains, Indigestion, Nausea all can reflect intestinal changes due to hormonal imbalances.
47. Slow Digestion often goes along with the bloat ? what previously took four to five hours to digest, now seems to take all night. It seems worse in the evenings.
48. Lack of Appetite may be experienced as more of a lack of interest in food, going to the frig and standing there with the door open and staring blankly. Feeling completely uninspired, you busy yourself with something else and forget that you need to eat.
49. Changes in Body Odor especially disturbing when it seems to focus in the groin area, but can be anywhere on the body.
50. Puffy Eyes, not only from sleep disturbances, but also can accompany low progesterone.
51. Facial Pallor alternating with Facial Flushes is often intermittent with hot flashes.
52. Flare up of Arthritis worsens with low progesterone levels and increase sugar intake.
53. Loss of Bone Density, Osteoporosis, is not only an elderly woman?s disease, though it seems to develop over an extended period and is triggered by the decline of hormone production.
54. Dry Hair, Change in Skin Tone, Integrity, and Texture, becomes more wrinkled, and may begin the thinning process.
55. Changes in your Fingernails characterized by easy breakage, bending, cracking and getting softer.
56. Itchy, Crawly Skin with a strange sensation like insects crawling around under the skin ? quite different than the dry skin feeling.
57. Muscle tone seems to slack and sag, and loose its previous response to normal exercise.
58. Pelvic Pain can be random and independent of cycles and may feel continuous for some women.
59. Dry, Itchy Eyes felt in the deep posterior aspect of the eye socket, as well as superficially.
60. Teeth Aching or the experience of a strange sensation in one?s teeth or gums, often accompanied by an increase in bleeding gums.
61. Change in the normal Tongue sensation, which can be accompanied by a feeling of burning in your tongue and roof of mouth, malodorous breath or change in breath odor, and/or a bad taste in your mouth.
62. Memory Loss or Lapses in time, makes one feel disoriented and less focused, especially when you go into another room to get something specific and seconds later cannot remember what you went to retrieve.
63. Feeling Faint for no known reason (this does not include standing up too quickly)
64. Tingling in Extremities not only feels weird and like your hands or feet are falling asleep, but if persistent can be a symptom of diabetes, B12, potassium or calcium deficiency, or a compromise in blood vessel flexibility.
65. Sensation of Electrical Stimulation,or Shock occurring in the tissue under the skin, and may signal you that a hot flash will begin.
66. Increase and worsening of Allergies occurs as hormones become imbalanced, so can our immune system.
153 likes, 3046 replies
emma91040 jayneejay
Posted
I spoke to my GP this morning. She has agreed to do FSH test to see if I'm in peri and says if its not high then I'm definitely not and the symptoms can not be caused by that. Hoping it is high because if not I will be back to worrying I have a host of serious illnesses! Cant tell much from periods as i have Mirena coil which is also stopping me ovulating anyway and giving me irregular bleeding. When i put it to her that not ovulating is going to leave me short of progesterone which could be causing some symptoms she dismissed it. I think she just thinks I'm anxious which I am but honestly think it can not just be anxiety causing all of this. Feel like the NHS doesnt have time for things like this. Unless you have an actual illness they arent interested.
lisa95354 emma91040
Posted
Well that’s too bad Emma, they deleted my one reply to you, not sure why, that’s very strange !
emma91040 lisa95354
Posted
oh no! What did you say? My GP really seems to see this as black and white issue. I had the numb arms in bed really badly last night. Kept waking me up. Today I have a cold patch on my bum and my hand feels like i put a face mask on it and left it on too long!
Sw62355 emma91040
Posted
hi Emma, I'm trying maca and magnesium as well now for the 'numbness' and pins + needles that I get. Its been a bit better the past few weeks (of course it could be that it would have been anyway as hormones fluctuate). I've been getting coccyx pain as well now and one day recently the only way I could describe it would have been to say it felt "cold". What a rollercoaster peri is with all these bizarre symptoms!
lisa95354 emma91040
Posted
Emma, you’re cracking me up with your hand feeling like you left the facemask on too long, you are funny. But I know this is not funny, I’m not making fun of you, but we may as well laugh as cry 😉 try a holistic doctor I would say, and check in to your magnesium levels. A little magnesium can go along way 😉
stacey32660 jayneejay
Edited
im 56 and post meno 1.5 years.
im feeling off balance when i walk and have a rash on torso.
ORIGINALLY ON one side, dr gave anti virals thinking shingles as i had classic symptoms, still burning lower back pain but now i have a rash on other side of torso, looks more like a chicken pox rash.
im taking angeliq its helped hot flushes but thats about all.
Going to dermatogist FRIDAY but im driving myself insane googling all the dreaded things it could be.
ALSO suddenly got a blister on my elbow out of no where. - so fed up.
pam90720 stacey32660
Posted
hi stacey!!! im 2 years post meno and off balance too!!! one of my worst symptoms 😦
brings my anxiety to a whole new level!!!!
take care ❤
cindy17746 stacey32660
Posted
I'm there too! Off kilter all the time.
kjvands stacey32660
Posted
I'm almost two years late perimenopause and get burning lower back pain quite a bit and strange rashes and hives that come and go. I find both worse when my stomach is off meaning lots of bloating, infrequent bowel movements etc. I try twice daily to have psyllium husk in water and aloe vera gel. If I get off track everything flares up again. It's hard at times to stay on the straight and narrow 😦
tonya13787 kjvands
Posted
Hi kjvands,
You sound similar to me, with the strange rashes, the bloating, irregular bowel movements and pains. No matter what I do, I still stay constipated, although I have always been like this. It just seems worse now. It is a struggle to survive at times. I hope things turn out well for you.
kjvands tonya13787
Posted
Hi Tonya, so sorry you have these things too. I too have had bloating for years even dating back to my teens. The rashes can be so inconvenient at times where I'm at work in a meeting and they start and I can't scratch:( What stage are you in e.g. late perimenopause? This time of life is truly a struggle. Thank you for the well wishes and the same for you.
xo Karen
lisa95354 kjvands
Posted
Morning KJ/Karen, check out my post to Tanya, it pertains to you as well 😃
tonya13787 kjvands
Posted
Karen, I am going on 49 this Fall and I've been going through one form of this stuff since my late 30s. Today was a bad day for me. Lack if sleep and stomach and chest pains. I know what you mean about the itching, too. It's pure misery. A while ago, I had a seriously bad feeling that my mother is either dead or is about to die. I've been crying and PMS'ing on top of everything. 😢
tonya13787 lisa95354
Posted
Hi Lisa, I never got your response due to moderating. Maybe they are tiring of us p**s on and moaning about our problems? 😳
kjvands tonya13787
Posted
Sorry you've had to endure this for so long and you haven't had a great day. I'm 50 in July and almost two years have had more severe symptoms. But knowing what I know now I probably started early perimeno around 37 as my muscle cramping issues started then mostly around my periods going to a 21 day cycle.
I too have those thoughts about my parents. I think it's another thing that comes with this age. My parents are both around 80 years and my dad just had cancer in his ureter duct and major surgery as a result. Trying to deal with these symptoms, and aging parents, their illnesses etc., it's a lot. Some weeks I look back wondering how I got through.
kjvands tonya13787
Posted
Lisa I'll read your post once it's available. I'm sure it'll be super helpful. Thank you as always xo
lisa95354 tonya13787
Posted
LMAO Tonya!! Thanks for the laugh, that was hilarious !
lisa95354 kjvands
Posted
Dear Karen/KJ… I’m very sorry to hear your father had that cancer and especially that huge surgery, at his age could not of been easy. My father passed away when I was 25 and my mother did a year and a half ago. It is very very difficult dealing with aging parents that are not well. My best advice is TO remember to take care of yourself, be kind to yourself, and to remember that it is their journey;)my sister and I were both going through fibromyalgia and Menopause when we took care of my mother after her stroke. I mean this with all my heart, make sure you take care of yourself, it’s crucial. Remember to set limits with your parents, there are things we can do, and things we can’t do, and that is OK! I just saw something very interesting on Pinterest about protecting our energy. Google “programming your water." It’s very very interesting and works. Blessings to you and your parents!
lisa95354 tonya13787
Posted
Tonya, Is your mother currently un well? This is extremely extremely common during this time. I had it so bad I thought I was gonna lose my mind. This will make you laugh, but I was even worried about my pharmacist dying. He’s probably in his late 70s, but he is awesome and great with holistic medicines, compounding and advise. When feelings like that arise, try to do the deep breathing and tell yourself allowed, this is my hormones, this is a process, making me feel this way. I even say... thank you for the positive affects, hormones, but the negative, you can go scratch 😉
tonya13787 kjvands
Posted
I'm sorry about your dad. I guess going through these changes really remind one of their mortality. Yes, I was 36 when I started noticing odd aches and the hot flashes started. It feels like a lifetime of experiencing this stuff. Thank you, and I hope things start getting better for all of us.
kjvands lisa95354
Posted
Thanks so much Lisa. So sorry your dad passed away when you were young and your mom more recently. You've been through a lot already. Thanks for your self-care advice. I'll have to look up later today programming your water. That sounds interesting.
kjvands tonya13787
Posted
Thank you Tonya. My GP recommended a therapist who helps you with accepting this time of life, mortality, aging parents, etc. I'm considering it but she's really expensive per session:(
lisa95354 kjvands
Posted
Hey KJ, I know what you mean, when I emailed one the other day she was $350 an hour. I don’t give a damn how good she is, that’s ridiculous, $350/hr. also it depends on their age, how could someone like their counselor if they’re like 30 years old, they would you know the talking about. Something like this, you’d have to go through in order to counsel on it;)
lisa95354 kjvands
Posted
thank you KJ, it’s all good, my dad suffered from clinical depression so when he passed I was relieved because he was finally at peace. And my mom had suffered in a nursing home for several years, so you’re glad to see them go when they suffer 😉 Thank you though you’re sweet!
kjvands lisa95354
Posted
Whoa Lisa $350?! Umm that's like another layer of financial stress we don't need! And agree they need to have at least gone through some aging stuff (would help too if they have or have had perimeno and meno symptoms lol).
kjvands lisa95354
Posted
I'm glad all is good Lisa. I can imagine it's a relief when the person is suffering. Thank you for that insight xo
tonya13787 lisa95354
Posted
Yes, Lisa, my mother is not doing so good because she had to have a lower leg amputated to save her life and she just wants to give up on life. I think it is normal to worry about your pharmacist and anyone else that you have in your life for a long time. My husband and I both have been having nightmares of family members dying and we both expect bad news soon. Thanks , but I am quite sure my crying spell was a warning of bad news to come. This past February, I had a bad feeling and my husband's cousin who was a year older than me was having pains in her hip so she went to a dr and found out she had 2 weeks to live due to ovarian cancer. She never made it those 2 weeks just a week and half. She had no idea that she had cancer just thought it was arthritis. Just last week I dreamed of my mother being shot and killed. I am worried for her, but I have made peace and have prayed that her mother will come for her when her time comes.
lisa95354 tonya13787
Posted
Oh Tonya... I am so very sorry, an amputation is devastating. My heart goes out to your mother, you and your family. I don’t know, you hear crazy stories like this, where people go in thinking it’s arthritis or gout or something and boom their dead a month later. What I find to be very helpful and very comforting is.... that God’s timing is indisputable. You obviously are a woman of faith. I’m not preaching, trust me, I’m not some holy roller or someone who is trying to preach to people. I do believe in God, I am a Christian, I’m Spiritual and I pray to God every day, all throughout the day. But I also cuss like a sailor, and have 1 million other flaws 😉 So we just have to have faith that God knows what the heck he’s doing, and everything, literally, is out of our control. But the dreams, I know... it’s our hormones .. it’s also our intuition... but it’s also a great majority of anxiety. So by all means, I don’t mean, listen to every dream you have as something bad is going to happen. I do believe that so much of our anxiety comes out in our dreams. Do you know that at the end of the day, when we’re laying in bed at night. We all think of negative things, reminisce about the past, shoulda, coulda, woulda, etc... do you ? It really contributes to nightmares. Try to just deep breath and remember that God is in control, we are not.L! I know I’ve had dreams also that are foretelling, but remember, The majority of our dreams are not 😃 I really am so sorry about your moms amputation, that’s so very difficult. I will be keeping you both, in positive, uplifting thoughts 😃 God bless you both !
lisa95354 kjvands
Posted
Karen....HUGS 😉
lisa95354 kjvands
Posted
KJ/Karen, the other thing is ...there are a lot of really screwed up people out there counseling, because believe me, I have run into them. I have a goofy story, basically, on every counselor I’ve ever gone to. Unfortunately… They’ve all been women ...lol Search for a good one, I know they’re out there 😉
lisa95354 tonya13787
Posted
Tonya.... did you know that estrogen is a natural pain fighter, literally. So when you were feeling eggs at 36, that must mean that’s when your estrogen was either depleting or bouncing around. And I am sure that was probably at ovulation and at the time of your period, when estrogen ebbs and flows m. it is freaking exhausting ! it does feel like a freaking lifetime of her going through it and I know it goes on for sometime. I remember telling my doctor at the age of, must have been 41, that I felt like I was dying. I remember him sitting down and looking me straight in the face and saying, you really feel like you’re gonna die?. It surprised me because the guy barely has a pulse and has the bedside manner of a slab of cement. so if I said that at 41 I MUST of been feeling that way for quite some time to go to the doctor for it. We will survive 😉
tonya13787 lisa95354
Posted
Hahaha! I can't help but laugh about your doctor. Most men just do not understand how this stuff feels. Some are more sympathetic. Yes, it's been over ten years since the basic start of aches and hot flashes. 2011 started the times when I felt like death warmed over. So, during spring of 2011, I was 40 going on 41 in Sept. It's been a roller coaster since then.
cindy17746 tonya13787
Posted
Hi ladies,
It really does feel like you're dying, doesn't it? On my bad days, that is exactly how I feel. On good days, I'm just fine. It's definitely a roller coaster ride. Much love and support to all. It's great to be able to share this stuff with a community of people who totally get it.
crystals51917 cindy17746
Edited
Such a roller coaster ride and I don't like roller coasters. Lol! I never ride them. 😃 I WISH IT WOULD JUST GO AWAY AND NEVER COME BACK! I keep thinking this can't be menopause the way I'm feeling. The doc says it is and she has no red flags of nothing else but I keep saying this is crazy! The appetite changes, nausea, weight loss in joints and ache, brain fog, cloudy brain, sweats (at times) lower back ache, don't really want to be around anyone, and depression because of all of this. 😦 All of which just started at this level Nov 2018. I've been going through menopause since 46 and I'm now 52 but not this bad. This is the worse symptoms I've experienced. Praying for all of us.... I really do pray.
cindy17746 crystals51917
Edited
Crystal,
It's hard some days to want to keep going. On a bad day, I cry much of the day. I would gladly have my period for the REST OF MY LIFE if it meant I didn't have to endure this. The biggest obstacle for me to accept is that I am no longer able to make commitments. I just never know if the day will be good or not. It's so frustrating and depressing. I am 50 and the last two years have been horrible. Lots of missed days at work. I think I started about 5 or 6 years ago, but the last two have been misery. And it's hard to explain to people just how miserable it is. They're thinking, "It's just hormones." But they rob a woman of herself and the life she once knew. I pray too. For you, me, and all of us. Hang in there. Reach out to the rest of us when you need to.
crystals51917 cindy17746
Edited
I just said I rather have a period ANYDAY than to feel this way. I try to explain how I feel but nobody understands... Not even the dr's . Thank you for responding. It helps to talk to each other. God Bless! X
pam90720 cindy17746
Posted
cindy ❤❤❤❤ im with you ... im totally with you...sending biggest hug ever ❤❤
lisa95354 tonya13787
Posted
Tonya... Yes .... death warmed over I can relate to, but it does get better. Can I ask you, how are you with hot weather, I absolutely can’t stand it. I literally feel more alive in the fall and winter, the heat and humidity makes me feel dead.
lisa95354 crystals51917
Posted
Hey Crystal, That is the same thing I thought after having symptoms for years, no DR actually told me it was PERI/ Menopause. they just always wanted to put me on an anti-depressant. it’s like my pharmacist said, you’re not short of an antidepressant , you’re short of hormones ?! But you do feel like you’re dying and the symptoms are off the charts but it will get better. So are you still in Peri, or are you post menopause?
tonya13787 lisa95354
Posted
Oh, hot weather made me so sick last Thursday that I thought I was dying. It felt like it was shutting my breathing down and made me sick to my stomach . I had to rush home and use the bathroom and then lay down. So, I can't handle the heat.
tonya13787 crystals51917
Posted
I agree even with the old fashioned cramps and mood swings.
tonya13787 cindy17746
Edited
Yes, it does make you feel like every disease known to humanity is ravaging your body and mind. It's frightening to face it alone, that is why it helps to read about other's experiences.
tonya13787 lisa95354
Posted
Same here, I believe in God and Jesus, but fail miserably in living up to the standards. But yes, all my life I've gotten warnings. Irish ancestors. Lol. What makes it worse about my mother, is she won't talk to me now. I have not been able to see or talk to her in a long time. I was called and informed that she had to have the surgery or die. My mother is a ward of the state due to health and mental issues and we don't live near her. Long story, but, that is the reason I turned it over to God. Our dreams have always forewarned of coming death. I have books where I have recorded the experiences. I have made peace that I have to expect her passing unless I go first. The other hard part of life is saying goodbye.
crystals51917 lisa95354
Posted
Hi LISA, I really don't know what I'm in. . Since OCT of 2018 I have spotted 2x's over a period of 3 months this year. I do mean spot... just for a couple of hours then that's it. Thank you for responding. It's so good to talk to you ladies. X ❤
crystals51917 tonya13787
Posted
TONYA, OMG! I have been thinking the same thing. 😦 They need to have something that we all can take to get us through this time in our life THAT REALLY WORKS to rid the symptoms. ❤ X
lisa95354 tonya13787
Posted
Oh Tonya, I am so very sorry, mental illness is a very slippery slope and very hard to keep relationships In that case. How are you doing with her not speaking to you, are you doing ok with that? and that type of situation you have to realize, and I’m not saying this loosely, but literally, it is what it is. I journal my dreams in my notes feel of my phone, but I should put them in a journal. do you have enough to deal with with the stage in life, so I’m sorry that issue with your mother is an extra huge layer of difficulty. I am sending you positive loving thoughts.
lisa95354 crystals51917
Posted
I was lucky with the way mine exited, I guess. The last two years I had no period at all up until, that is, up until, to the date, May 29, two years in a row! And I was literally like hours from officially being in menopause, and it started. That very last period, hit me like a freight train, terrible terrible cramps which I usually did not have just in passing if any. And I felt like total dog sh**. IDK if that means you’re on your way to entering post menopause, just hang in there, things will get better 😭(VIRTUAL HUG)
tonya13787 lisa95354
Posted
Thanks Lisa. I journal my feelings/thoughts down and deal with them that way. The lady wanted me to talk my mother into having the surgery at first, but mom would not even pick up the phone. At first, she wanted to just be left alone to die, but the State took her leg anyway since they have to try to prolong her life. It has been difficult not being able to talk to her. I had written her letters and sent her cards but she won't acknowledge me now. She'd also had ovarian cancer surgery last year since she wouldn't stop bleeding and if she makes it to Christmas, she'd be 69. Lots of worries crop up with her health and I can't help but wonder if I will head down that same path. 😕 I am just trying to make it through this transition day by day without losing my mind.
tonya13787 crystals51917
Posted
Wouldn't that be great? Something that would let us keep a clear mind but ease all of these symptoms at once. Women like us would flock to get it. 😉
kjvands lisa95354
Posted
Thanks for the hugs Lisa! Back at you.
Oh man all I need is a screwed up expensive counselor to put me over the edge lol. Thank you for the heads up. When I felt good this past Jan-mid May I could deal again with life but then everything flared again and my ability went down and the thoughts of a counselor entered my head again. What a yo-yo time of life.
kjvands cindy17746
Posted
Hi Cindy, I struggle with work stuff too. Before all this two years ago when my symptoms kicked into high gear I had this really good track record at work - minimal sick days, work countless hours, get involved in many things. Then all this hit and I had to start taking sick days including visits to specialists. I actually had to take a LOA for 10 days last June as they were testing me for MS and ALS and I was so scared and literally shaking from nerves. I had to tell work something and as I have mostly male bosses I didn't want to tell them my reproductive system is "shutting down" so had to tell them some of my issues and leave out "related to menopause". Every so often they ask "are you all better?" (ie can we pile on more work again?) and I say no and want to say "Ask me after menopause as I hope to be then." Some days I'm 'half-baked' at work from my leg cramp meds as they affect me cognitively. Those make for interesting meetings! I would love to retire (at age 49) but financially that's not possible for me 😭
lisa95354 kjvands
Posted
Morning Karen, Have you trued anything naturak for the keg cramps, magnesium, COQ10, potassuim. Have you ever gad a blood panel to check your minerals. As I write my left keg us bothering me and it shoots up into my buttock. Sounds like sciatic but I dont think it is. I noticed in the supplement my husband took, years ago, Legatrim, it was mostly Vitamin E? On top if menopause Im dealing w/ my husbands, IED, interrmittent explosive disorder & I seriously cant do this anymore! I googled it & it seems this is an silent epidemic happening w/ women in their marriages/relationships. I think he thinks I will never leave him. I have always had a very high tolerance for bs, but not anymore. If we split Im never getting involved again.
lisa95354 kjvands
Posted
Its worth it but hard to find a good one. When I worked in the foster care system, our 2 shrinks at the office, one was goofy as help & the other, loaded on meds. That is entertaining how your boss asked if you were 'all better'. Like theres a magic pill to take(eye roll.)
lisa95354 tonya13787
Posted
Tonya....That is what men have thought, historically, that we can take some 'rainbow pill' and be all better.
lisa95354 tonya13787
Posted
Tonya, Women have been programmed to think they will end up like their mothers, its a myth. I wondered that too, but like my massage therapist said, I greatly am commited to self care, meditate, sound therapy, this forum... etc... Our moms era didnt do that. Like, you journal, I bet your mom didnt, right? You are looking for healthy options;) Im sorry again for all the challenges w/ your mom, it is a true burden. My dad suffered from what appeared to be clinical depression, my whole life, dibilitating, had to retire early etc... I was grateful when he died at 63, he was FINALLY at peace. There is only so much you can do & you have made efforts, you cant beat yourself up, you need to be kind to yourself;) Do you live in the same town as ur mom?
lisa95354 tonya13787
Posted
Get one of those spray bottles that has a lil fan on the sprayer, mix a few drops of peppermint essential oil w/ witch hazel, feels amazing:)
crystals51917 lisa95354
Posted
Lisa, thank you so much! I just love all the ladies here. We are family! Sending hugs right back!! We are going to get through this! ❤
tonya13787 lisa95354
Posted
Your dad sounds like my mother, always depressed. You're right she didn't journal, even though I tried to get her to. I keep telling myself that I must do what I can and let the rest be. I can only be responsible for my life. Thank you for the therapy. 😊
tonya13787 lisa95354
Posted
I'll look into that. Thanks.
tonya13787 lisa95354
Posted
I wish they were right.
lisa95354 crystals51917
Posted
😉
lisa95354 tonya13787
Posted
Tonya, we can only give so much and I think that’s what this time is for also. We have to lay boundaries down and a hard line, to protect ourselves & our already depleted energy;)