8 Weeks in and still not feeling too good
Posted , 7 users are following.
Hello
I've been taking 20mg of citralopram for 8 weeks now. At about week 3-4 I did notice a difference, I felt like the edge of my depression was taken off and I no longer thought about ending everything. I never felt totally better but had a bit of a dip at 6 weeks which I put down to pmt but the following week I had a few days of not having any motivation to move or do anything, other than the necessities with children. I just wanted to sleep.
I have always hidden my depression from everyone and paint a smile on my face. I just feel numb now and in limbo. I'm waiting for a talking therapy appointment but have no idea how long that could take, I'm desperate to talk and get things out but have no one in my family or friend circles who I want to talk to about it. My husband does know but I think he is sick of it all to be honest and he has noticed I'm smiling more since taking the medication so thinks I am better.
I'm seeing the doctor for a prescption review on 7th June so will wait and see how I am then as I know it takes time to get into your system but I just need to get it out! I have spoken to my Health Visitor (as I have a pre school age child) but I glossed over things and said I would email a friend to talk about it who lives overseas but I just couldn't bring myself to email her. The HV told me she was there if I needed to chat but I know how busy all healthcare professionals are and don't want to waste her time and what would I say!
I feel like I am more accepting of my own depression and it has made the symptoms I had been denying more prominent and feel worse, if you know what I mean!
I'm also still exhausted, my short term memory is terrible and I keep getting words mixed up eg lunch for breakfast, pan for cup etc. Silly things that the kids find hilarious!
Anyway any advice and virtual hugs would be appreciated.
R
2 likes, 13 replies
paul57484 RayLou773
Posted
RayLou773 paul57484
Posted
My eyes have been opened up to a world of depression too, it's helped me accept what is happening and that we are far from alone.
Rx
weenett RayLou773
Posted
RayLou773 weenett
Posted
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michele_76511 RayLou773
Posted
Michele
RayLou773 michele_76511
Posted
Rx
roby_54688 RayLou773
Posted
I think Waite untile it's 12 week
some ppl need more time
if after 12 week no diffrent think about increases the dose with your doctors
I hope u will get batter soon
stuck with it and give it time
try to talk with ppl that's will halpe u not feel alone
RayLou773 roby_54688
Posted
I'm struggling with the talking to people, I have friends with depression and they talk about it but I'm just not ready. I think I will in time. I really want to start my counselling asap but not sure how long the waiting list is.
Rx
debi76 RayLou773
Posted
I started on 20 mg of citalopram which ive been taking since Jan this year.
The first few weeks were awful and then very slowly I started noticing little things that my mood was lifting .
I was off work for 2 months . I was off again recently for a few days as my mood dipped again but did improve .
At first I posted on this site anytime I wasn't sure about any side effects or just for moral support ..,,, never keep anything in just post on here.
Everyone is so supportive it really does help.
Oh and message your friend overseas I'm really sure she won't mind . Just think if it was her and she was wanting to confident in you im sure you would want her to message you .
You need to talk.
Debi x
RayLou773 debi76
Posted
It's good to know that it takes a few weeks, I do feel different but still very low. I can't tell if I'm just more aware of the symptoms now, as I was hiding it from myself (if that is possible!) for so long all a bit confusing really.
I will email my friend, she went through depression herself and talked to me. I just don't like burdening people with my nonsense. I know she'll not see it like that.
Rx
debi76 RayLou773
Posted
Yes it makes total sense you saying hiding it from ppl close to you and not wanting to admit it to yourself. Yes I was very aware of feelings I posted on here most days just for reassurance.
Great idea writing things down if you don't feel ready to chat just yet. It will come in time the main thing is don't bottle everything up inside.
Sounds like your friend will know exactly how your feeling if she herself has been through this. Good luck R .
Debi x
deidra40034 RayLou773
Posted
RayLou773 deidra40034
Posted
It has been good to talk on here, I'm going to email my friend and I think I'm going to start writing things down, I feel like I'm storing too much of this in my brain and need to get it out! I don't feel ready to talk to anyone in person (family/friends) yet but I'm sure I will at some point.
I'm also going to take my meds at night, starting tonight. So will see how that goes. The brain fog is so annoying and a little upsetting even though the kids find it funny!
Rx