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A few drinks a night...

Posted , 6 users are following.

Becca1030
Becca1030

So recently I've been having a few drinks in the evening after work. Perhaps 3-5...not enough to be drunk but just enough to be a bit tipsy and numb a few problems. I used to drink lots when I was younger (13-25) but cut down a lot. Just a seems a lot of websites seem to think having a few a night is cause for concern...general consensus??

3 likes, 8 replies

8 Replies

  • pmcg21
    pmcg21 Becca1030

    Posted

    Hi Becca , see what happens if you dont drink for a few nights- if you find this difficult and find yourself thinking about drink or craving drink, this maybe an indication you are developing a problem-some people go through periods of time in their lives when they drink to much-they turn to drink to help them cope with particularly stressful situations - while not recomended on health grounds, it does not automaticaly follow that you have a drink problem-sometimes you need to examine the cause rather than the symptoms- i'm an alcoholic but i am very wary about telling somebody they have a problem with alcohol- there are very many levels of drinking-each of us is different and our reaction to alcohol is also diferent - i would imagine that the fact you have posted on here means you are concerned about your drinking at some level- only you will truly know the effect your drinking is having on your life- be honest with yourself and you will soon know if you are heading for trouble- all the best- 
  • PaulJTurner1964
    PaulJTurner1964 Becca1030

    Posted

    The key issue with what you say there is 'numb a few problems' Becky. If you are drinking for the effect, like that, you are at risk. That is the difference between social drinking and risky drinking.
  • Robin2015
    Robin2015 Becca1030

    Posted

    HI Becca. PMCG said it all in his reply. IT is great that you are sharing your concern and now is the time to evaluate or re evaluate your actions. Are you comfortble or did you really wish to stop deep down? This is a place to get advice and share problems/concerns and please let us know what you are doing and we will all try to best assist you.   smile
  • Becca1030
    Becca1030

    Posted

    Thanks for replying. I've never used a forum or anything before so pleasantly surprised with the quick and caring replies. I'm late twenties and been living with my partner for 5 years. We have a mortgage and both work full time. He has had a problem with smoking weed since he was a teen and its caused us money issues where we are in debt and can't afford any niceties in life or even the necessities due to what he spends on the drug (£80 a week at least!). He came back home from being out a few months ago and said he was moving back to his parents to save money as he couldn't deal with living with me anymore and being broke and arguing etc and I could do what I wanted. This left me no option to have to move back to my parents as I can't afford mortgage or to rent alone and he won't consider any other option. We haven't moved yet but this is the stress that's causing me to drink daily again for the past few months. I don't want to live apart after 5 years together let alone move back home at the age of nearly 30...I thought I'd be married with kids and a house around about now but my life seems to be going backwards. To some people this may not be a huge deal but I'm an independant person who hasn't lived at home for ten years and the towns are an hour apart. I just feel so low I always turn to drink when I feel like this..it stops me from caring so much even if it is just a few vodkas a night. I think I could easily stop if I wanted to but then The problems get me down and I'm prone to depression and anxiety. Seems if I continue drinking it could become a problem again like in my late teens early twenties and if I stop I'll have to face the truth and the possible end of my relationship. Both options suck!
    • PaulJTurner1964
      PaulJTurner1964 Becca1030

      Posted

      Becca, so sorry to hear what you have been going through. Anybody in your situation would struggle. However, I feel I need to point things out about the way you are thinking. I think you probably already know these things but it never hurts to have somebody else remind you of the obvious smile

      You have a man who has prevented you from having a decent-quality lifestyle because so much of your money goes on weed. Then he blames YOU and basically says you can do what you like because that is exactly what he is going to do.

      You mention being an independent person but your dependence on this man is what is making you feel so miserable and has been for years. You have none of the things that you hoped to have in your life, by now. I am struggling to see what he has to offer you.

      You could do so much better for yourself and you deserve better. This man of your's needs to decide what is important in his life. You can put up with years more of feeling worthless until you eventually decide you have had enough of him, or you can decide now that, if he isn't going to give anything to the relationship, that you will find a person who appreciates you and cares about your happiness, and move on to a more fulfilled life.

      You are worth a lot more than the life you have been living, Becca. Don't waste any more years. Tell him to give you a reason to stay in the relationship or to forget the whole thing.

  • patricia44773
    patricia44773 Becca1030

    Posted

    Oh Becca, what an awful position to be in, you have my total sympathy.  It seems that you are self-medicating with the vodka, maybe it would be better to go and talk to your doctor about your anxiety and depression.

    I hope with all my heart that you find a solution to your problems, life is just so unfair at times.

    Pat xxxxx

  • Becca1030
    Becca1030

    Posted

    Thanks for the replies. Everything everyone has said is true..I know that deep down. Sometimes it helps to hear other people say what you're thinking as I doubt myself sometimes as its hard when you're involved with feelings and stuff. Given me food for thought...thanks xx
  • jamie_44327
    jamie_44327 Becca1030

    Posted

    i started to drink because mt father was a bully, i still drink even though i am totally estranged from him and my mother. i would say that the danger you are facing is using booze as a way of feeling better, it certainly can numb things but then it soon wears off, i am actually feeling that i m constantly on the verge / edge of being drink dependent; the more i drink the more i need to, but then i feel ok, it's a funny one, i can't seem to escape the viscious circle but also now it is dominating my life.    So in response to your post i would say that having a few per night really is a problem - yu very soon get used to it, i know that it can be easy to think thta a few [ bottles] is ok, but it will catch up.   Speaking as someone who has binge drunk for 21 years but is also very active, able to do exercise for 3 hours in a go and ironically then feel the need for a drink, also doing 11 hours at work with up to 150 miles driving Mon - Thurs and not drink until friday but then do a massive one, i think it is all about having an alternative to stress relief like walking or herbal tea.     its knowing when to stop, set some goals perhaps ?
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