Posted , 3 users are following.
I have posted a few times not knowing what to do. And things keep changing. About a month ago my ex broke up with me saying she couldn't feel love for me. Work stress and relationship stress just made her stop feeling. She said she cares about me and wants to be friends. We work with each other but don't need to have any face to face contact and really nothing more than a few emails a week is all the communication that is required. For a week we really didn't talk and tried to keep things only work related. It didn't stay that way though. Neither one of us kept radio silence and after 3-4 days if we hadn't talked one of us would contact the other to check in via text then last week we had a work discussion going via text and I had to ge in the car so we turned into a phone call. We went from talking about work to talking about everything like we used to when we were together. We talked for two hours that night. Then after we text and she said it felt more like it used to. (When we broke up she said talking to me caused her anxiety because I reminded her of work- and at that time she was near the point of quitting$ Since then we actually talk more( not text) we both admit we miss each other. She has started going to therapy she has told me. This week we talked on the phone at least an hour every night about everything. And she tells me that she is going to visit family and that she could detour and have dinner (she lives 3 hours from me and her family is about an hour from me) she said "if we are going to be friends we should act like it" referring to spending time together. She said she doesn't want me to think that she wants more then friendship. But then her mom contacts me and she went to her moms last weekend and her mom (for what ever reason has loved me from even before she and I dated and wanted us to daate from the first time we met- my ex and I were close for months before dating and I met her mom then) and says to not give up on her. She doesn't know what will happen but she went through her mom's phone and stopped on the pictures of her and I and told one her mom's friends that I am a wonderful person and that she doesn't want to lose me but that she got scared of how fast our relationship was moving.
I just don't know how to react or what to think intent is or isn't. She says one things and does others. My anxiety is just now getting back under control since the blindsided break up. Another factor is that two weeks after the breakup I was in her city for work and everyone went out drinking. I ended up stopping drinking and being the DD for everyone. When I dropped her off she got sick. I helped her to bed and she grabbed me and told not to leave her. She pulled me close and just held me until she fell asleep. No sex or kissing happened. The next day sober she says she still can't fell anything.
So if you have read all of that : I guess I would like advice about what to think or expect. When my anxiety hits I pull people closer( not always a good thing) but the point is I don't understand her reaction.i do love her and there isn't any question that she loved me at one point. I would give it another go and try but I am confused on what is going on. Any help would be great thank you!
1 like, 20 replies