After 3 Weeks On Citalopram I'm Confused Help Please

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hi everyone i'm 41 not had a good life to be honest and due to a recent bereavement all the past as come rushing back to me i've been told it's grieve coming back from when i lost my mum when i was 12 and a year later my gran and since then my dad passed away and now something simple as losing my pet dog as made me remember the past i never really grieved for my mum,gran, and dad like i was on auto pilot and to be honest i did feel so bad at one point i thought life wasn't worth living anyway i've been on 20mg citalopram for 3 weeks and not been able to face work and the doctor as put me forward for councilling but still not heard a thing about it.

And now i am starting to go down hill feeling bad anxiety about everything my sister reckons i shouldn't go back to work until i have seen a counciller because after a couple of sessions i might get worse before i get better all so i'm on sleeping tabs 3.75mg which do work to get me off to sleep but during the day i get tired so quickly.

Any advice on what i should do my head is everywhere at the minute don't know whats best for me maybe more time off???

thanks

dave

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  • Posted

    Hi Dave, I'm feeling your pain. Grieving is commonly associated with anxiety as I understand it. Your mind is everywhere, you're fighting scary thoughts, you feel like you're having an out of body experience... the list goes on. Whilst it's hard to accept and see through the mist right now, you need to remember that this is just a very temporary blip that most people experience in life, I know that doesn't make it any easier. I recently had a bout of anxiety, same age as you, put it down to no sleep (new babies), work stresses, over sensitisation, male menopause... who knows. I recently found this site http://www.anxietynomore.co.uk/anxiety_q_a.html which I found a breath of fresh air. Just have a read of the Q & As on this page and the next, it will hopefully put your mind at rest that what you are experiencing is temporary and provide you a means to pull yourself out of it - the simple solution is to tell the anxiety to 'come get you' and lower your defences... the scary thoughts and worries then slowly dissapear as you are not giving them importance. At the moment you are giving anxiety too much respect that it does not deserve. Don't fight, just accept and get into a habit of this - it will take time, BUT this is your way out. Good luck mate
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    • Posted

      thanks mate that was a nice reply just like marcel i will try and take all the advice in and try to get through this i've just got back from the doctors he said i'm doing the right thing by not rushing myself trying to get myself better i just feel weak at the moment and was expecting to get councilling quicker to be honest but there is a big waiting list for this so i will have to wait a little but one thing i have learned is that i am not alone with advice of this site i've just been a very emotional person and very sensitive but that is due to what i have had to grow up with i.e childhood and you know i can speak to people like yourself i just hope i don't give up because the last 2 days have been bad ones for me.

      thanks hayden

      regards

      dave

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  • Posted

    Hi Dave,

    I have been on Cit 20mg for almost 8 weeks and I know exactly how it feels. For the first 2-3 weeks things will be difficult as the Cit may not have kicked in for you yet. Hopefully you should notice a change / difference in yourself between weeks 4-6. Everybody reacts differently to this drug as It took me 4 weeks! 

    All I can say is that you are not alone and there are some people on this forum with similar experiences and have great tips / advice. Im going through a really difficult time as we speak, and this forum has been a real life saver. Definitetly talk to someone and keep busy / active. Hang in there a little longer mate its worth it smile

    Dont give up.

    Regards Marcelsmile

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    • Posted

      Thanks marcel for the reply maybe thats what it is another week or so i just feel that if i did go back to work i might get stressed out even more than i am right now and things might just spill over for me if you get me.

      I had 2-3 days at the weekend when i was feeling ok and then for the last 3 days i started thinking about things to much like i'm analysing things that i can't do anything about and the more i do the more i feel myself get all upset inside i'm going to the docs later today and i'm a little nervous i know i still have these stupid thoughts goling around in my head and i'm at a all time low and should i put councilling before work i don't really know the answer.

      Anyway thanks marcel again for the words of comfort i just hope i can get to finish line soon but that seems a long way off at the moment.

      take my friend 

      regards

      daveconfused

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  • Posted

    Hi Dave,

    Yes, I felt very Anxious, worried and stressed about going back to work, I felt as if people would judge and treat me differently. I told my boss my about my situation and to my suprise she was very supportive. In fact all my friends said they would be there for me. I was even more suprised when some of them said they are on or have been on Cit too. 

    Currently I am experiencing the same problems as you. for the last few weeks things have been really good and positive. I'd have the odd day of feeling down and depressed and that would soon pass. However the last 3-4 days my mind wonders, the anxiety & depression creeps up on me and then Im a mess again, lifes not worth living and I feel like giving upsad

    I have gone back to my GP and she suggested to stick with 20mg for another few weeks and if there is no change she wil increase my dosage.

    I have tried councelling whilst working and it did help a lot but I found that it wasnt me. A friend suggested for me to do volunteer work, so I do that once a week, for only an hour on my lunch break to take my mind off things and its been great. Some sort of routine may help as well.

    I know these are hard times, you 'll get through it and it will get better. You're not alonesmile

    Regards

    Marcel

     

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    • Posted

      Thanks again marcel for the support well i'm off to the docs shortly not sure what to expect to be honest i just need to tell him everything and not keep things in if you get me like i have done in the past but as i write this i am worrying so much about things just been talking to my sister and once again she says don't go back to work until you have at least started coucilling because she is worried that if i went back to work and then started my councilling i might be too much for me because i know a lot of things are going to come out from the past etc... and the added stress of work won't help me but i'm sure the doc will know whats best for me ???

      regards

      dave biggrin

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    • Posted

      Hi marcel,

      The doctor feels that i am not ready to go back to work just yet maybe in a weeks time and he said the 20mg is right for me.

      He told me to not rush myself just yet.

      and to be honest the last few days have been bad ones.

      regards

      dave 

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    • Posted

      Hi Dave,

      Glad it all went well with the Dr. Are you happy with the result?

      I agree with the Dr, don't rush it, as it takes time for the drug to work. I know you want results fast with these bad thoughts and feelings to end now, I did too. It's really hard, but you've come this far, don't give up.

      You'll know when you're ready to go back to work, if they are a good company, they should understand and support your situation / decision.

      It also sounds like your sister is a great listener. I wish I had someone like her to talk to. Just talking about this helps.

      As for councilors, yes there is a massive waiting list but I couldn't wait, So I went to the Citizens advice Beareau to see what options were available to me as I couldn't afford private.

      Hopefully, the next few days get easier for you, let me know how you get on.

      Regards

      Marcel smilesmile

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    • Posted

      thanks marcel yes i feel happy with the result of what the doctor said i will see how the next few days go and i will let you know and once again thanks hopefully one day when i get through this i can help others in the same boat.

      Its like now it nearly 6:40 pm and i don't know what to do i got a xbox there and i've only been on it twice in 8 weeks and thats not me at all and i just don't feel like watching a dvd even but i'm here i surpose thats one good thing fingers crossed i will feel better soon.

      regards

      dave smilesmile

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    • Posted

      Hey Dave,

      Glad you're happy with the result from your Dr. Yes it's definitely a learning curve and quite a journey.

      Yes, it's great to share your experiences with others and they will appreciate it as I do.

      I'm not a gamer so when there is time to kill, I know it sounds bad and a lot of people will disagree with this but I have a few glasses of whiskey as it relaxes me and I read or watch a DVD like Shawshank redemption etc or exercise. Something to stimulate the mind which helps me. I guess what ever works for you.

      I just want the old me back and I'm I'm sure you do too. Believe me it gets easier. If feels as if you don't care about things but you do, hard to explain, but you'll get what I'm talking about soon.

      Exactly, one step at a time. You'll be yourself again soon

       M smile

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    • Posted

      hi well it's been over 4 weeks on citalopram not sure if i'm doing the right thing going back to work this week i start back on weds on a phase return basis but there is some part of me saying not to go back and the other saying yes go back i'm in a bit of a confused state and feeling very anxious and feeling them anxiety states again but i have got a doctors appointment in the morning maybe he not to happy to let me go back so soon but work did say that they would support me for as long as i need but how long is a piece of string i won't know how i feel until i do go back in work and still no sign of the councillor appointment yet which don't help me at all the citalopram may still not being doing it's job just yet maybe i should just see the doc and see what happens but i am anxious sad

      regards

      dave

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    • Posted

      Hi Dave,

      Sorry for the late reply, Hope you are well?  How did the doctors go? Did he/ she say hang in there a little longer or has you dosage increased? Some people take a little longer for the drug to work than others, between

      4-6 weeks. I think mine was between 4-5wks

      I think that is fantastic news that work will support you smile 

      I agree it is worrying taking that first initial step back to work, I'm sure you will be fine. You can only try. If it doesn't work out, just say you're not ready yet.

      Gee there must be a long waiting list for a councillor. I'd try a local charitable one. My first assessment was £20 then each session after that was a small donation. She was just as good as private. It was great to offload my issues and have someone to just listen, not judge & give guidance.

      You could be waiting for ages if it's on NHSsad

      Anyway hopefully the Cit kicks in soon and thing get better for you

      let me know how you get on.

      Take care & talk soon

      Regards Marcel smile

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    • Posted

      hi marcel sorry for the late reply i have been back to the docs twice since i spoke to you it's weird because it's now been 5 1/2 weeks on citalopram and i have had a streak of good days and then i get two bad days together then thats when i think they are not working properly but i have been told to stay on them for a good while and the Dr said i'm fine being on them as long as i'm happy to and feel better i think he might up the dose but i might be wrong also he wants me to finish taking zopliclone for my sleep problem which is a big worry when that happens but there is only one way to find out.

      I have been told it won't be long until i get to see a counciller but i was told that 2 weeks ago i still get days when i feel better just staying away from people but then i get it the other way round when i need to be around folk.

      I Did my first late shift last night in work since the start and then i was in first thing this morning and i really struggled to get up but i did it but only just.

      i hope your doing ok my friend it's been good to chat to someone 

      take care and do keep in touch.

      regards

      dave

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    • Posted

      Hi Dave,

      Thanks for your reply, Im good thanks for asking. Still taking each day as it comes. Like you I have really good days and the odd bad one. I have to keep telling myself, everybody has a bad daysmile

      Hope all is well with you. Sounds like the CIT seems to be working and you are having more good days than bad.

      Thats great news about the councillor, however I cant believe its taken this longsad

      Its good that you are back at work too, and have had the motivation to push yourself.

      Hang in there mate you are doing great. things will only get better.

      take care of yourself and chat soon

      Regards

      Marcel

       

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