Alcohol Dependant

I really want to drink right now. I've been very good recently - not drinking, but it doesnt make me less depressed, and I'm more socially phobic.  Alcohol has hurt me and my family terribly, but I still sometimes want the oblivion it can bring, and the feeling that it doesnt matter what happens.  If I wake up in hospital or a police cell - again........ - then sod it, here we go again - if I dont wake up at all, I can think of worse ways to go. 

You want to drink it because you are mentally and physically addicted to it, like I am, and no matter how much it hurts you, or how long you've managed without it, you always will be.  Without it, life doesnt magically become great - you have to cope with the same problems, sober, and people are still awkward and grumpy with you.

Sorry, I know this isnt much help. Its a horrible dilemna. I've been thinking I can manage without going to the alcohol support sessions I was offered, but now I know I cant, so I'm going, starting Monday.

Alcohol is a depressant, which is not good because it makes you feel bad then you want to drink more.

You need to break the cycle, which is hard but not impossible. Are you recieving any support? Your doctor should be able to refer you to places that will help.

I have never met an ex-alcoholic that isn't pleased they gave up drinking, which is something to think about.

Also, I have cirrhosis of the liver at 24. Not from drinking, but still, I can promise you that you don't want to live in pain like I have to. xxx

I think the answer is in your title heading.

The brain controls us to feed it with its cravings even if they will hurt the body as a whole.