Alcohol is the devil
Posted , 10 users are following.
I made a post the other day. I spoke to my sister and she said that I need help. I agreed, while drinking beer, and didn't stop. I have mental health issues (anxiety, depression, panic disorder) and I blame this for why I drink so much.
I work from home and literally love (hate it) because I can drink when I want to that my partner doesn't know (because she hates it).
I never get hangovers, I drink anywhere up to 20 cans and still get up at 7am and make breakfast. Yet I believe this is where my problem lies, drinking for up to 16 hours a day.
I wake up thinking of alcohol (I don't have a drink though) I can get through until 5pm without a drink but then I binge.
I probably need help, but I literally love getting drunk (mostly on my own) and at this moment in time, I would be willing to lose my family to be alone and drink.
I haven't lost it yet, but I will do, surely, and I think I need help before I do.
1 like, 16 replies
ADEfree mathew20446
Posted
Matthew, have a look at this, more as a starting point for finding out more about Medication Assisted Treatmement in general.
https://patient.info/health/sinclair-method-for-alcohol-use-disorder
That's one med and a method of using it, there are others for sure. It may be that Naltrexone would be a problem for your anxiety, but maybe not. Like I said, Naltrexone isn't the only game in town.
Cold turkey without post-detox medical support has a success rate of about 10%, a lot of people relapse when going that route. Add in Alcohol Deprivation Effect and when they do relapse, they often shoot past the amount they were drinking before. There are meds to help kill the craving/compulsion to drink. That's mainly what needs to be handled, as when you get stressed out, the immediate problem is likely to get tossed to the part of the brain that remembers that alcohol = pleasure. It's an unconscious part of the brain and the conscious mind doesn't have a good track record of controlling it.
With the booze out of the way, efforts to move past the mental issues will yield much better results. As you hit your usual drinking time of day, the lack of alcohol in your system will tend to trigger anxiety and it's ilk. Alcohol is a short term antidepressant, but when it starts to wear off, it shows it's true colors as a powerful depressant in itself.
You're doing the right thing in starting to question your relationship with alcohol and looking for a way forward. Keep it up, you'll get there. Keep gathering info and resources. Never give up, Never surrender!
vickylou mathew20446
Posted
Mathew, from what you've said, I would imagine your a 'functioning alcoholic".
regarding loosing your family, are you seriously saying that you would choose alcohol over you family ? If that's right then you seriously need help.
you probably don't get hangovers due to the fact that there's always alcohol in your system.
you need to see your doctor if you're serious about tackling your problem. Whatever you do, don't just stop as your body will go into withdrawal. You need a medical detox with either diazapam or Librium to avoid withdrawal.
However, in one sentence you're prepared to lose your family so you can drink alone, then say you need help.
mathew20446 vickylou
Posted
It's got to the point where alcohol means more to me. Alcohol has ruined everything for me thinking about it, every since I was 20 and I drink even more now.
I dare not stop because come 2pm I start getting angry and I need a drink to calm me.
I have seen the functioning alcoholic description and I am like a leprechaun to Guinness in comparison.
With that banter, never guess I'd had 14 pints would you?
ADEfree mathew20446
Posted
Mathew, have you ever been through detox?
How would you like to proceed here? If you're inclined to get rid of the drink, there are meds to help you do it.
vickylou mathew20446
Posted
The reason you dare not stop drinking and start to get angry come 2pm is because your body craves alcohol. In other words it needs topping up. From 5pm to 7am.
if you don't start till 5pm and don't drink in the morning, I don't understand how you can be drinking 16 hours a day.
alcohol will only ruin your life if you let it. You know you've a serious problem, but with effort and support you can overcome this.
i hope you do ask for help, otherwise as you say, you will lose everything
neville79844 ADEfree
Posted
My doctor won't give me the meds I need to stop the shaking. the sweating, the sleepless nights. Is there any way not have to go through all that? Drink has lost me my job, my wife. I am 61 years old.
h1954 neville79844
Posted
Oh that's awful, Neville. And yes there are ways to not have to go throught that. RHGB is someting of an expert when it comes to tackling the medical professions and associated beaurocracy, so I hope he replies to you. Or you can google alcohol use disorder, campral, and the sinclair method for info to take to your doctor, if you haven't already done that. Meanwhile, rest, drink as much water as you can, eat what you can, especially a couple of bananas
neville79844 h1954
Posted
vickylou neville79844
Posted
poppy47815 neville79844
Posted
h1954 mathew20446
Posted
If you don't start drinking til 5 pm and get up at 7 am how are you drinking 16 hours a day?
It's really good that you recognise a problem and want to deal with it. Others have given going advice about medical treatment options and not stopping suddenly
It might be worth writing down exactly what and when you drink just to get a baseline from which you could gradually reduce.
If you really would rather lose your family than not be able to be alone and getting drunk I am seriously concerned for you. Please go to your doctor, say what you've said here, and what you've learnt from this forum and agree a way forward to help you.
I wish you all the best
h1954
Posted
Misssy2 mathew20446
Posted
I SO remember the feeling of wishing everyone would go away so I could JUST drink and I remember believing I loved alcohol more than anything.
What I learned is...I loved the feeling of blocking out feelings....I loved the creativity I felt I had when I was drunk...I loved the person I thought I was when I was drunk.
So...what scares me about your particular post is I do not think you are ready to stop. I do not think you will stop right now....I do think that this post is a STARTING point of you realizing that alcohol has some sort of control over you...and you thinking maybe....you couldn't stop if you wanted to....so that you subconsciously believe it is YOU that choses to love alcohol.
I was where you are many, many years ago...and I tried to quit many times to no avail....because I was not ready to quit. For me..it wasn't until I started getting the hangovers, starting being unable to be part of my family functions, started being not so great at work and started realizing that I could not stop if I WANTED to.....That is when I finally made a real attempt to quit....and failed, and failed and failed...until one day I did quit and I quit for 8 years.
I've struggled again with this demon....your post reminds me of the Adam and Eve story in the bible...the devil is telling you this is good...and it really is not good. I feel for you.....You will know when you are ready to stop...I just don't think you are ready.
This is a safe place to post about your problem to people that really understand....maybe here you will pick up a seed to be planted for future freedom from alcohol....maybe you have left already...not to return until another time you think you may be ready to address the problem.
Sounds like at least cutting down would be good for you...if you tried that Naltraxone method they talk about...it may help you.....if not it is still worth a shot...no harm....just one little step toward "readiness"
hope4cure mathew20446
Posted
you call alcohol the devil. Is that who you really want to spend your time with? Becuz it really is as you well know! It has controlled ever corner of your life.
it is a depressant and makes all your symptoms you have worse .
Please see the you tube video made by Paul Turner a alcohol specialist in the UK. I will private message the link to you.
gwen45436 hope4cure
Posted
G.