Alcohol problem - seeking advice

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Hello there! I have been a binge drinker for at least a decade now. I have social anxiety disorder and I believe I first started binge drinking at bars/clubs in order to handle my anxiety. 

As I have gotten older I generally drink once, sometimes twice a week. Most of the time, if I start drinking, it is hard for me to stop. 

I believe my drinking these days is mostly tied to built up stress. After a week of work, it hard for me to wind down, and the majority of my binge drinking happens on a Friday night. I probably black out 20-25% of the time I drink, for at least part of the night. I have made stupid decisions such as driviing drunk, getting in verbal fights with people, and engaging in risky sexual behavior. 

I believe I have a problem. I know eventualy I will hurt someone or myself if I don't stop ( I have been fortunate so far ). I believe I need to find another way to release stress on Friday nights, without having to drink and party to excess. 

I am extremely hesitant to join AA. I don't believe in god or a higher power, and I don't like speaking in public or sharing these type of personal issues with a large group of people. 

Any advice? 

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4 Replies

  • Posted

         Hey Micheal. 

      My name is Nathan.  I'm 31, have been drinking for 16 years.  With that said...

      First, AA does not work unless you want to believe in God.  If you don't, there is not someone watching over your shoulder.  And the "sponsor" concept actually got me two drinking buddies.  Stay away from AA.

      Drinking due to stress is why almost EVERYONE drinks.  The drink creates the stress which necessitates the guilt which leads to more drinking which you then feel guilty for and...am I right

      (FYI, I am not pro or con any program anyone wants to participate in).

       Your anxiety.  I understand that.  Served in the US Military (yeah, I'm from the States but ya'll are more open about this) and did so with massive amounts of booze.  More than I'd ever imagined.  Joined when I was 22 and the drinking age in the states is 21 so I was already good to go. 

        Anxiety.  Alcohol disables the anxiety.  It does create more if you let your mind wander but when you are actively drinking, it is temporarily disabiled.

        Your acknowledgement of problematic behavior is key.  Glad you see it.  Driving drunk is NEVER okay.  Sure, you drink twice a week but you see the errors.

         Honestly, I do not think you are an alcoholic.  I AM AN ALCOHOLIC.  I do not expect a response nor do I expect you to take this with any grain of iodine ...sorry, salt.  You drink more than you think you should.  If that is what is running through your mind, than you drink too much for you.  Good for you brother!

        Joining AA isn't necessary unless 4 occurences happen:

           1)  You refuse to stop drinking for 30 days

            2)  Alcohol is 60-100% of your social function planning

             3)  48 hrs after NO ALCOHOL, you are not sweating, nervous, paranoid (look up withdrawals)

               4) You have no desire to quit drinking after the 30 days and understand what it can do to you. 

     If you can do that, well, you are not chemically an alcoholic.  So rest well with that

     

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  • Posted

    I don't believe I am an alcoholic, but it isn't important to me what label you put it on it... the important part is that I feel drinking alcohol is putting my life, and the life of others in danger. 

    To reiterate, I guess my question is, what resources and advice do others have to help me quit drinking.

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  • Posted

    Ok.  You have actually 99+ choices to stop drinking.  The fact that you are on this commentary says to me that you have already figured out 97 of them.  Now, I will be real with you.  Alcohol is the most selfish drug on the planet.  Your answer is not going to come fun or easy;  alcohol sucks.  If you want a wonderful answer?  Ask a more idiotics question.  I love it.  The answer to your real questsion?  Find a reason better to not drink than to drink.  Human contact, etc.  Then when that fails will you know that you rely on alcohol.  It is your friend, your silent partner.  I'm 31.  I figured it out 7 years ago and still cannot break up so if you think I'm wrong or you're right, I'm sorry I wasted your time.
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  • Posted

    My son has been a alcoholic for yrs.. He started as a teen to medicate himself major anxiety. Parties,,, after work.... College....until he is no longer my son!

    He is still in denial & 25 yrs later still thinks he can quit. Some if not most can never quit...it a life long mind change which leads to mental diseases & character disorders. AlcohoL destroys Brain cells....big time.. Look it up... Comparisons of normal brain vs alcoholics brain.cat scans....MRI...

    See for urself cat scans don't lie alcoholics DO.. TO GET that drink even LIE to themselves they LIE to do  undermine there own thinking to stay clean, for finding ways to cheat, devert, excuses... Sneak... Steal... U name it it gets much worse.

    I have seen him thru hell and back..just reciently he was on life support. Now that's a picture any parent cannot ever get out of their head. After several weeks of fighting for his life then rehab... The first thing the brain wants is alcohol.Alcohol... That's just what he did.. Even after he was given a second chance at LIFE. _ ALCOHOL CONTROLS THE BRAIN ....it's killing me & his whole family and the children who he fathered & never took care of , abandoned cuz of his addiction to alcohol.. That's is how powerful the brain craves alcohol....THAT IS YOUR FUTURE!

    All ur habbits are around alcohol & catered to UR cravings that's UR life. What are u going to do about UR addiction? It will get worse.....so where are YOUR priorities...

    a future or THE BOTTLE...? So..........Do u want a life ...or a slow DEATH...?

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