Am I becoming an alcoholic?

You're certainly on the way to becoming alcohol dependent. Which basically means you can't go a day without alcohol.

You have to find a way to cut down, their are various ways, but each person is different. Your first priority would be to try and have a couple of alcohol free days per week. Also, long term (you're not long term yet, but it comes around quick) it will damage your health, but not show the physical signs.

Hello Sally,

I am not any kind of expert, but I believe that daily drinking is a problem.

The fact that you feel sorrow and want to stop... is a problem.

The situation when you still go on to drink... is a problem.

Have you spoken to your G.P. or anyone medical, about your drinking?

Alonangel 🎇

Hi Sally, I do feel for you I know its not easy, its harder because ur husband drinks every night, thing is you have noticed its a problem but unfortunately he hasn't admitted it, am sure he feels same as you next day, its a vicious circle I've been there, I do hope you can confide in someone else like a close or a doctor, I wish you both well and hope you can sort this problem out XXX

You say - All day I tell myself that I'm not going to drink that day.......then of course, I do. 

I think you already are an alcoholic...not becoming one .

The criteria I was told to use by many people in therapy...were things like this:

Is it affecting my life?

Is it affection my health?

And more questions but I think the first one you already answered yes to.

Its clear you are concerned and that you searched out a discussion board.

Its clear that you are "praying" for forgiveness...so you feel like you are doing something wrong.

Its clear that drinking alcohol is making you anxious.

Your husband in all honesty probably doesn't want to tell you he thinks you have a problem...because it seems he has the same problem and if you STOP..he will be drinking alone and that may cause problems because your eyes will be opened to how much he drinks and then his drinking will be affecting you and your relationship.

Alcohol is tricky.

Excessive alcohol consumption, or abuse, harms your health.  That is the bottom line.  And that makes it a health issue.  Please make an appointment to see your doctor and explain to him/her that you are finding it difficult to cut down or stop.  Your doctor may be able to help you in the same way that people are helped by their GPs to stop/reduce smoking.  Or, if your doctor doesn't have the necessary facilities in the surgery, you may be referred to a specialist to help you with that.  You are not alone.

For many, many reasons having an issue with drinking, or drug use, is associated with being a weak-minded, or morally corrupt 'bad' person.  This belief has been passed down over many years and is, unfortunately, still reinforced today by the media - look at the films and tv shows that depict drinkers or addicts as 'bad' people, and helpless to do anything about their situation, or the constant ridiculing of people like the ex-footballer Paul Gascoyne.  If you are not sure who he is, google him and look at the general reporting of his condition!

Anyone who over-uses a substance like alcohol will eventaully find themselves sliding so much further down the rabbit hole into extreme problems and ill-health.  Please don't let youself be that person.

You would not feel ashamed if you got cancer, or diabetes, or high blood pressure, or low blood pressure, or was suffering from arthritis.... would you? Hopefully, you would just pop along to your doctor, explain that you don't feel well, and your doctor would begin to look at options to help you.

My point is that this is a medical condition and it can be dealt with.  It's great that you have seen things aren't right for you at preset, seize on the opportunity to do something positive about it and ask your doctor for help.  Years ago, it was believed that not much could be done to help someone who drinks too much - now we know, and understand, so much more about this that things CAN be done to give you the additional support that can benefit you and help you get a handle on things.

Ok, guys! I have had an alcohol free day! I would love to drink, but I purposely didn't buy any to have at home. I'm excited!

Two days, no alcohol!