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I have periods of confusion and a sense of unreality which last several days and then gradually subside when I unilaterally reduce the dose for a while. During these periods, something I see, hear or read may trigger a memory or suggest a relationship or correspondence with something else – but what? I can’t find the connection. I may remember something (e.g. a past event) but can’t place it. After great effort I realise that the event never occurred, and that it isn’t a real memory at all. It’s as if the part of my mind concerned with dreams and imagination and the part concerned with memory (information recall) have got mixed up. The result is chaos. I don’t forget things; I remember things that never happened.
Also, for long periods there seems to be something in the back of my mind (sometimes almost a sense of doom) but I can’t make out what – like having icons on your PC screen but the links have all gone or lead you to the wrong file.
In the past I have had side effects from other drugs and my GP’s reaction has usually been “well if it does the job I would put up with a few (silly) side effects”. Thanks doc. My cardiologist smiles smugly and talks of “CNS side effects” without suggesting any alternative. I don’t think they really hear what I’m saying. That’s often the trouble with doctors – they are far too fond of the sound of their own voices to listen to those of their patients. They are victims of scientific medicine which makes us all survival rate statistics.
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