Antidepressants withdrawal or underlying condition?

I have already posted this elsewhere but thought I would start a new thread to get a second opinion.

I would like to share my experiences withdrawing from antidepressants.

I had been taking them for a year, but had to stop as they were giving my some very adverse effects (hostility, hyperactive, racing mind, I would go on crazy rants, verbal aggression), and as I wanted them out of my system immediately, I stopped cold turkey (NOT recommended). This was a year ago (to the day in fact)

1-2 months: flu like symptoms, extreme tiredess, shakes, brain zaps, cold sweats, vertigo. Tbh I have little recollection of those months, but it was not far off like the scene in the film Trainspotting. I even nearly went back to taking the ADs as it felt like an addiction.

2-4 months: severe mood swings, tearfulness, angry outbursts, insomnia, I felt like I had damaged my brain, foggy minded. I started taking omega oils, magnesium, krill oil supplements, and Sharp Mind tablets (from Boots)

4-6 months: still emotional, up and down, physical symptoms all clear, went to CBT but I couldn't take any of it in, very hyper, restless, incredibly hostile, resentful, bitter.

6-8 months: anxious, paranoid thoughts (like being watched, fear of people overhearing my conversations, being spied on with hidden cameras), nervousness, overthinking.

8-present: still changeable moods, but my mind feels like it's stabilised to how it was before I took the ADs, I now cringe looking back at some of the mad s*** I did last year when on the ADs. I'm over the paranoia as well, one thing I did learn from CBT, monitoring thoughts and questioning how factual they are.

Thing is, people may say I might have relapsed into depression, but I don't feel it, I'm genuinely enjoying things like socialising, hobbies, I'm working, dating, etc.

I'm not even sure I was clinically depressed in the first place, it feels more like reactive depression to a series of sh**y events in rapid succession.

I think the thing I feel sad and upset about is that I didn't feel supported, especially by the medical system, there's absolutely NO after care, or check ups, reviews, I felt like I was left to my own devices to deal with it, even to be told what was happening to me, I had to figure it all out on my own .... that it was purely the withdrawal symptoms, and not me going crazy.

Then again, even the doctors themselves told me the NHS was terrible, understaffed, badly run, inefficient, etc, so I can't blame them, or anyone really. It's just life.

Thank goodness for my tendency to 'overthink', which led to a ton of googling and extensive research, leaving no stone unturned, otherwise I would have probably thought about topping myself.

I should also add that I was originally put on 20mg Citalopram, but had to reduce it to 10mg, as 20mg was far too strong for me, I couldn't function and I was too unfocused, I could hear myself talking but my brain wasn't registering what I was saying.

Probably around 3-4 months into it, I switched to hyper mode, hostile, aggressive, bitter, etc.

So I told my docs this, and they switched me to 20mg Prozac. I only took it the once, and I had some kind of weird meltdown, it felt like a bad trip. Intense anxiety mixed in with intense aggression, and my insides felt like they were melting.

That's when the docs told me I had to come off ADs full stop. They did tell me to taper off gradually, and put me back on 10mg Citalopram, but by that time I had had enough, and just went cold turkey.

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