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Anxiety and avoidance is anyone else like me???

Posted , 5 users are following.

vicky51471
vicky51471

hi 

ive had depression and anxiety for years now 26 Long ones!!

i find it hard to get out as it is but because of someone in my family's actions I fear it more and more.

I cancel appointments to avoid where people will see me I don't go to my friends. The worse thing is I hide. I hide around corners under trees in toilets then rush past people. I fear that the people who hurt me years ago will one day be around one of the corners  or in one of the shops the drs etc. I am constantly trying to keep in but I can't.

so I've managed this thing avoidance look down to the ground and don't hang around. Don't go out if I can avoid it. I even get someone to get my medication for me.

my heart races I make myself jump sometimes I'm so scared I sweat my palms so bad. My breathing gets low and it's hard to breathe.

 Does anyone know how I can try to help myself.

i found myself now looking out the window and shutting curtains all around.

i don't want to be like this, I try to day to myself it will be okay. Though I know it's not ok.

even if someone has read this I thank you.  

I'm Struggling with this like never before it has got worse since I moved back to my home town. Where things happened. A small town.

I guess what I'm asking is anyone else like me.

its constant fear of panic attacks and how to avoid them in itself.

thank you if you've read x

vicky

2 likes, 7 replies

7 Replies

  • michelle40250
    michelle40250 vicky51471

    Posted

    Dear Vicky. You are stronger than you think because you are now wrighting your feelings down which is a start. You should be proud. Do what I do I can go out and put on my headphones to shut out the world believe me it works. Don't isolate yourself it will make things much worse for yourself. Take one step at a time and each day as it comes. If I was you personally I would not want to move back to the same town that bad memories occurred. You need to move away if at all possible and try and put the past behind you. Start a fresh. I can never go back to the town were my childhood memories are so bad this would make me scared. I feel safe where I am no one knows my past and it's best that way. So please read this over and over and you will eventually understand. I am so sorry for you living your life this way.

    • vicky51471
      vicky51471 michelle40250

      Posted

      Thank you very much for your reply.. I have to live here, it's where I have my mum. No one else. I did move away for 2 years but had to leave my abusive husband. So that's why I'm back.

      i am on a lot of meds but they make me feel bad.

      i will read your post again and again.

      thank you very much for advice🙂

  • ann55375
    ann55375 vicky51471

    Posted

    Anxiety came first for me, then avoidance.  

    I was given anti dep which was horrendous, long with diazepam to try to get anxiety down.

    do you find some days are worse than others?  I wake with feeling fear, fear of life outside.  Is it the meds that cause these feelings, i was just a quiet person until this struck.

    it is awful, maybe some medicrion would help you?

    • vicky51471
      vicky51471 ann55375

      Posted

      Hi Ann 

      thank you for you reply I am on 2 antidepressants diazepam pregabaliln and pain relief. I don't know if they are any good really.

      i wake at least 5 times with night terrors then I panic about the day ahead.

      some days are worse I'm better around my mum.

      lik you I'm a quiet person.

      hope you feel better soon

      thank you for your reply

      vicky

  • marleen85993
    marleen85993 vicky51471

    Posted

    Hi Vicky I am sorry you are struggling so much.l know that avoidance is probably the main thing that people with anxiety do however we start with small things then it develops to the point where we avoid everything which makes our anxiety so much more in control.I think you should go to your doctor and get therapy for what happened you in the past and help with your anxiety.Write down things that scare you number them.Set yourself a goal and do the one that scares you the least until you lose the fear of it.Also practice relaxation techniques on YouTube.l know your terrified and it won't be easy but living your life in the house is terrifying also.

    • vicky51471
      vicky51471 marleen85993

      Posted

      hi marleen

      i am awaiting therapy but it's been a long wait. Your right I started to avoid small things then big things.

      i am going to try to make s plan to do somethings this week and see what happens.

      i feel safe in my mums house, that's why I will try to do a few things and not avoid them.

      its just I am always on honking what shocks gonna come today if you know what that mean..

      many thanks for you advise

      i will try x

      vicky

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