Anxiety, Doctor wants me to come off Mirtazapine in 2 weeks
Posted , 2 users are following.
Hi everyone,
I've been on Mirtazapine for about 1 and a half years, mostly 30mg. This was due to relentless online bullying and harassment from 2019 to 2021 causing depression and anxiety. Back in November I reduced my dose to 15mg as I felt like I was much better and that the drug was doing more harm than good (I was pretty emotionally numb) and didn't really experience any side effects.
Then a month later my dog died. I went back up to 30mg to cope, I felt pretty numb again. Recently my anxiety has been SO much worse, surrounding around the time I was being harassed and the things people said about me, I had a literal meltdown crying about my anxiety. I contacted my doctor thinking the 30mg was making it worse, so he reduced it to 15mg, saying I've might have been on Mirt for too long and now it's effect has run out, and mirt is perfect for anxiety and OCD anyway.
It's been about 2 weeks I've overthought about the anxiety thoughts one too many times and now it lives with me 24/7 like a constant black cloud from the moment I wake up until I go to sleep. I'm withdrawing from my family, I feel down constantly. I feel like I'm spiralling again.
I contacted the doctor again today, it was a different doctor and my only options were:
a) Increase dose to 45mg (which would bring back the zombie-like emotional numbness)
b) Take both mirtazapine and propranolol at the same time (which I hate because I'd have to take it 4 times a day and it does nothing for me aside from slow my heart down.)
c) Taper off the mirtazapine completely and try something else.
And I was like, finally. I want to try something else. Then he said I should taper off it completely in 2 weeks. What?! There's so many horror stories out there about mirt where it takes people 6 MONTHS to come off it on lower doses like 7.5mg. My anxiety is so extreme right now I'm not sure I can even tolerate the awful withdrawl symptoms. And part of me wonders if the anxiety I'm feeling is due to coming down from 30 to 15mg anyway.
I don't know what to do. I'm so terrified of continuing to spiral to where I used to be - suicidal, self harming, alcohol, wanting to die. I'm SO scared of going back in that darkness but it feels like that's where I'm heading.
I don't know what to do.
0 likes, 1 reply
jan34534 holly11909
Posted
One of the best things you can do right now is to get a counselor to talk this through. You need support right now because it’s difficult to go through all of this by yourself. There’s lots of help out there and you could get some great guidance and support! I would also suggest that you look for other things to do that will boost up your self-esteem. Social media won’t do that for you. when we care what other peoples opinions are to the point of feeling bad about ourselves, then they basically control us. That’s not good. You are worth more than that. This is where a good counselor comes in. it’s time to take care of you! ❤