Anxiety so bad

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I have had had anxiety from a young age. I am now 21 year old female. Basically when i'm talking to someone its as if my brain freezes and all i can say is "that's cool" or "awh right". I can't think of anything decent or interesting to say. I have tried breathing techniques and mindfulness but my anxiety is stronger than them. I know im a nice person but I know people don't want to spend time with someone who's so awkward and not good at conversation. It's making it so hard to do daily things like go to work or to college because i know people avoid me. Does anyone else feel like this? Please help me what do i do

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  • Posted

    You really want to know what do? You have an anxiety disorder that needs to be managed. You can seek out a therapist. A cbt counsellor and take a yoga class. The therapist will assess you and talk to you and work things through if there are issues behind all this, the cbt counsellor will helo you to become more aware of your thoughts and the proper responses you need to take. And the yoga is very important teach you self calming techniques all around and proper breathing. Its a mix of things that will bring all this to a manageabke level. It will never allow you to ignore it or we all would have.25% of the entire world has anxiety related disorders so you are not alone at all. Your college might even run stress classes you should check that positive they have yoga classes.
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    • Posted

      Thank you for the reply! I have seen a psychologist already for almost 2 years and it hasn't helped. I have talked through other issues but i can't stress how bad it gets. I will check out about yoga classes too. Thank you for the help!

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    • Posted

      I have taken medications before but the withdrawls were so bad i came off them. I didn't feel they made much of a difference, i still had the same anxiety level with or without them

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    • Posted

      That stinks. I Have heard they only work in half the people who use them. They do have all new ones never know. I wish i had some answers for you, try the yoga and maybe that will bring you some relief. Anxiety is a hard thing to squash sometimes. Feel better.
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  • Posted


    Are you sure people are avoiding you?

    Have you tried practising on your own different responses for that's cool or Awh right?

    Think about what a response is. It should be your time to shine. And I know right now you shouldn't expect yourself to be ultra confident and varied in your responses but practice different responses.

    Also if you are near some people talking, listen (eavesdrop) and listen out for what the other person says, does or even stays silent. Does the other person sometimes respond with a question, does the other person make a comment in response and turning around the focus of the conversation?

    I'm not saying mimic what these people do but first just notice the wide range of responses.

    You are 21. You are still so young . Don't pressure yourself to be at a certain stage within 6 months.

    Just go with it. I'm sure there are books on the art of conversation.

    Please believe me when I say this but I had similar thoughts for years thinking I just don't know what to say in response. I said 'ah cool' a lot and yeah you do get self conscious. But as you learn to relax more things just come out and then you notice that your having an good impact on the conversation.

    Hope this helps.

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    • Posted

      I have tried mimicing but even at that its as if i don't have anything to say, like i can't even think properly because im so wound up on what other people are thinking. I have overheard "friends" in the past saying i was no fun and that they didn't want me living with them anymore. Since then i can see other people acting the same as them around me so i don't know. I will check out about conversation. I understand im still young but this problem has gotten dramatically worse in the past few years. I'm happy you had similar experience was able to relax and come over it. Did you do anything in particular to help ? Thank you for the reply!

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    • Posted

      I think I just tried to remind myself that I'm just as good or interesting as others even though I don't hav the skills yet to show it. I guess if you like yourself generally then that helps to begin with.

      Oh god it just reminds me how frickin judgemental people are. It makes me wanna cry.

      I'm not having such a good day today tbh. I'm real down on myself and constantly comparing myself telling myself I'm not as good as certain people I know. I'm different to most men, I'm not a blokey bloke, I'm reserved but I'm always thinking I Shud be more manly to fit in. I can't see it any other way. No one else is gonna bend backwards to be like me.

      Anyway I've had to look at myself and change my thinking and behaviour last 3 months. I've made some progress and I'm on a course of therapy to do with compassion for yourself .

      I wish there was a solution to all this cos I just keep coming back to it.

      Hope ur day was better.

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