Anxiety through the roof again

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I havent been on her for a while as I got through my last bout of anxiety and was more or less back to normal.  However as life has its way of knock you back it has happened again. This time its because my son has been diagnosed with Nephratic Syndrome, which is his kidneys are leaking protein and his legs are swollen.   He goes to see specialist on Thursday.   although he is an 30 he is still at home as he has had other medical problems.   I am so scared for him, my anxiety is through the roof again.  I am already on meds and feel really guilty that I feel this way as its him that is really suffering.  I think too far ahead and already have him on dialysis and needing a transplant and I know I am not strong enough to give him a kidney and I already have high blood pressure. Again Guilt.    I dont know what to do the doctor will only give me more meds, I have been to CBT three times already.   I will be not use to him like this.

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4 Replies

  • Posted

    best thing you can do is try to be strong for your son. And don't feel guilty about it.

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  • Posted

    This is raw fear. Anything that happens to our children, whatever age is so scary. You should not have any guilt at all. Yot dont even have a clue if your kidney would be useful to him, not even if it will lead to that. He needs YOU as his Mom, so forget the guilt. I dont think anyone could cbt there way out of this. I dont even think this is an anxiety disorder. This is raw fear any Mother would have their child. Hopefully as time goes on his care will become clearer and his recovery will be laid out for you by the specialist. Have the doctors themselves sat you down and discussed exactly what is going on and what needs to be done. Oh my love please i would be a wreck too. Anyone would be. Can the doctor give you some sedatives to help you thru this. I will put your son and you in my prayers and i wish you both all the healing. You are a wonderful Mother and a great person throw that guilt in the trash where it belongs! This anxiety disorder by the way is NOT YOUR FAULT! Whatever crap you have come to believe it is not not not your fault. Its an illness in and of itself it is not something you wanted, asked for or gave yourself like the world wants you to believe. It is what it is but do not do not feel guilty for having it because noone on this planet would choose to have an illness like this.
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    • Posted

      I dont know much in terms of his care and needs but whats with all the hype about 3D printing. Is this a possibility of a reality in this situation? If not at the present hospital you are at but in another more advanced one? Just a thought.
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    • Posted

      Son will not discuss with me. If I ask he goes mad at me. He is an adult I suppose and I have always picked him up and given him a home when he has failed in his life. This time all i can do I suppose is be here for him thank you
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